The Overwhelmingly Huge Guide to H2G2 Clubs

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All over H2G2, hundreds of cultural and countercultural movements are underway. People form their own religions, their own sports clubs, their own countries, and their own societies. To the latecomers to this overpowering wave of social interaction, the task of finding a comforting social setting is overwhelming. To ease the transition, we now present the official guide to the social, political, philosophical, and just plain silly groups within H2G2, all with open memberships and inexpensive dues.

Want to see your club here? Then post below with the following information:

  • The name and location of your club.
  • A descriptive ad to be posted here. See the examples below.
  • The URL of the person presiding over that club, if you are posting it for someone else or you are posting it yourself under a different identity. Also, if you can think of an appropriate title for the in-charge person, post that... otherwise, you place yourself at the mercy of my sarcastic wit.

General Social Gatherings

Clubs under this heading are just general friendly places to meet other H2G2 researchers, usually under some sort of theme. They're places where pretty much anyone could fit in, and as such attract massive numbers of researchers. New researchers looking to immerse themselves in the culture right away would do well to stop by a club of this sort.

H2G2 Anonymous, Deacon Deackie presiding:
This newly founded but I'm sure, soon to flourish society is for all those researchers who feel unable to cope without their regular fix of H2G2. Join the self-help group and share experiences, while providing support and advice for fellow sufferers.
BOF Inn, Boring Old Fart Pheroneous presiding:
There are, lurking around the nooks and crannies of h2g2, many quiet researchers, many boring researchers, many not very exciting or industrious researchers. A few have begun to congregate at the BOF Inn. They will not notice the intrusion should you wish to join them. The premises are rather seedy, more than a little down-at-heel, and the patrons, when not stuck in mud, are liable to be grumbling quietly in the corner.
The Freaks, Co-founders Cutlery and Lisa presiding:
For the people who are normal in every way excepting the normal one.
"Course I'm different, everyone's different. I'm just different in a Different Way."
The Greebo Appreciation Society, Self-genuflecting Greebo T. Cat presiding:
The Official Greebo T. Cat fan club, started in November 2000, this group of dedicated researchers worship the grinniest cat on H2G2. Affectionally called GAS, this society has grown, and keeps on growing due to the over-whelming cuteness of Greebo herself.

Why have a name, when you can be just a number? Join NOW. You may live to regret it, but life would be terribly dull if you didn't take chances. ~grin~

The H2G2 Guardian Angels, Creator God - almighty presiding:
The H2G2 Guardian Angels are a band of semi-pious souls, who see it as their mission to help out new users logged on H2G2. They seek to answer any questions that might arise out of the intrigues of H2G2, offer advice on constructing homepages and general advice across the wide vista of human endeavour (although, they might be a little sketchy on the last one). Who knows, you might even end up with your OWN Guardian Angel!!! So pop on over, and we'll send out the welcoming party.
H2IQ, Host Greebo T. Cat presiding:
A game show with a difference, H2IQ is here to stay. Visit and find out what all the fuss is about, and find out if you have got what it takes to be...
~fanfare of trumpets in the background~
Lazy B******s, Elusive Three-Toed Sloth Anhedonia presiding:
Basically for very lazy people, who aren't afraid to admit that they're very lazy people. Very lazy people who don't like big words and won't use a thesaurus.
Lil's Atelier, Curator, Hostess and Ottist Asteroid Lil presiding:
Lil's Atelier consists of a gallery where researchers can have their own creative works displayed for the general public to enjoy. But in addition there is also a very active salon, in the classic sense of informed discussion. Since the Atelier has its own geography and a pantheon of pets, you can expect there to be a certain amount of "performance art," but in the main this is a good place to come and hone your skills at topic drift.
H2G2 Musehome, Inspiring Archangel Dragonfly presiding:
Do you find yourself inspiring people at random!?? Are you a creative genius who lives in clutter!?? Are you artistic, theatrical, or musical...or are you composing a great novel... and no one seems to understand!?? Join the h2g2 Musehome, where all creative quirks are given their due respect. Our doors are also open to those who seek inspiration, as well as any mythological gods or creatures that will help us build an atmosphere of (Greek) MYTHIC proportions! Muses Wanted.
H2G2 Procrastinator's Society, Inertially-Dominated Goshoogoshoogosh presiding:
It's the only club you can become a member of without actually bothering to join - our stunningly low roster indicates an enormous membership of H2G2 researchers who have already thought about applying... but have put it off until tomorrow. Any promptly returned applications will be treated with disdain.
The Utopia Cafebar, Terminally-positive purplejenny presiding:
The Utopia Cafebar is a place to drink and eat and smile. There is a large noticeboard on the wall, and people are posting links about the environment, globalisation, space, freedom and fun. We are hoping to find Practical Solutions for a Utopian Future (TM). Sneerers and cynics are also welcome, but will be subjected to relentless positivity. Purplejenny is serving drinks, tea, chocolate cake and all sorts of yummy imaginary delights.

Special Interests

These clubs bring together researchers with similar interests, and are a forum for news, exchange, and debate about their chosen subjects. It's a great way to share a common interest with others, or to possibly gain a new one.

H2G2 Astronomy Society, Astronomer Yeliab Salohcin presiding:
H2G2 Astronomy Society, only a begining but it should grow. The astronomy society is looking for help with observing the perseids meteor show around the 12th. Go to for information on how to take part.
The Barracks, Private Major Two Bit Trigger Pumping Moron presiding:
Any soldier, sailor, airman, or marine has fond memories of sitting around the barracks and sharing tall tales. In the Guide, we gather here to share our experiences. Regardless of the nation we served, or whether we were in the Army, Navy, Air Force or the Marines, we are all brothers in arms. If you have served, are serving, or are thinking about serving, visit the Barracks.
The Blasted Heath - A Sanctuary for Challenged Gardeners, Green Man Wilfrid presiding:
A remote virtual inn-type forum for uninformed speculation as to the cultivation of barren squares, the horticultural requirements of inappropriately tender varieties grown under Arctic conditions, and the proper response to those suffering from Wilted Clematises, Mites, Blights, Rusty Plums, and Honey Fungus over a glass of elderflower smiley - bubbly
Bring Back Dangermouse!, Campaign Manager Mike A presiding:
BBD is something that gets all the old DM fans into one place. From there the fans mingle, and get a good few handy pointers to things that will keep their DM memories going.
Chocolate Lovers' Fan Club, Hostesses Saint Galaxy Babe and Mina, Muse of Bondage presiding:
For chocoholics everywhere, finally, somewhere we can gather together, read, write, and laugh about our experiences worshipping our God CHOCOLATE. Salivate over previous postings, be inspired to share your own delicious encounters. Whether oral or sexual, anything goes.
H2G2 Fiction, Chief Editor Lance Boyles presiding:
Tired of ordinary H2G2 facts? Feeling like something.... fictitious? Then H2G2 Fiction is for YOU! Read what other researchers have posted, maybe post that old story you wrote in 10th grade and were secretly proud of, or write a synopsis of your new novel. Dammit, if it's not true, H2G2 Fiction wants it.
"H2G2 Fiction - It Won't Rot Your Teeth like Ordinary Fiction!"
The Freedom From Faith Foundation, Chairman Colonel Sellers presiding:
A gathering of enlightened individuals who reject the cosmology of Christianity, the Foundation is dedicated to the impartial study of all religions, and promotes free discussions on any related topic. It is also houses a collection of links to pertinent H2G2 articles, some esoteric, some silly.
The Haiku Challenge!, Grand Haijin Sad, mad, or bad presiding:
Can you string words together to create powerful imagery, or a deep sense of peace in your reader? Do you love to create poetry in its highest form? No? OK, well uh... can you count to seven then?

Yes, no matter if you're a prize-winning poet or semi-literate why not pop over to the Haiku Challenge and turn somebody else's topic into a form of high art? You'll laugh, you'll cry (see your Grand Haijin's efforts, and you're GUARANTEED to cry), you'll make some friends!

The H2G2 Hi Fi Club Rooms, Audiophile SPINY presiding:

Do you ever sit down in the "sweet spot" to listen to music from your hi fi? Is your equipment capable of annoying not just the neighbours but their neighbours too? Have you ever bought a record because it sounded good even though you don't like the artist, or convinced yourself that the 30 quid cables sound better than the 25 quid ones?

Then you're probably a hi fi nut, and you'd be better off coming along to the h2g2 hi fi club rooms to talk with others who are similarly afflicted, because there is no cure for you. Sing the praises of your new turntable, tell everyone how you cured that annoying bass boom, wax lyrical about the sweet top-end of the recordings you've just made on a newly-serviced Revox - if you're the sort who can't listen to one side of a record without getting up to move the left speaker three inches, leave the music to everyone else and come and talk technical with us!

Messy Haven, Indolent Lady Elly presiding:
Are you messy, and proud to be so? Does the word 'Order' sends shivers down your spine? Do you think untidyness is a sign of true genius? If you've answered 'Yes' to one or more of these questions- please come join us on Messy Haven, a place for eating, drinking, sleeping, reading and talking without ever having to clean up after yourself! We also have the Messalot Library- librarians free, and are about to open a support group for clean, tidy people.
Musicians Guild, Music Director Fragilis the Melodical presiding:
The Musicians Guild brings together the musicians, singers, composers, and other musical aficionados at h2g2. The group holds music-related chats, organizes virtual concerts, and collaborates on entries about music and musicianship.
M2M2, Tony presiding:
M2M2 is a new area of H2G2 for people of alternate sexual orientations (the name is supposed to suggest 'M to M, too').
Northwest US Researcher's Group, Tree-hugger Mikey the Humming Mouse presiding:
In the spirit of imitation, I'm trying to create a Northwest US Reseachers Group. While getting people to write more entries on our wonderful part of the country will be encouraged (although we won't write them too gushingly, otherwise even MORE people will decide to move out here!), the main purpose of the group will be to plan some get togethers, hopefully involving food and alcohol.
Northeastern US Researchers Group, New Yorker Shea the Sarcastic presiding:
Come meet some friends from the Northeastern corner of the US. Hang with people who's understand your accent and cultural references!Links to Northeast Entries cheerfully provided!
We'd like to plan get togethers in different cities, help us plan!
The H2G2 Politics Forum, Councilman Dogster presiding:
The H2G2 Politics Forum is an international, inclusive (both left and right wing viewpoints, libertarian and authoritarian, etc.) place for people to publish articles and talk about a broad range of political topics (anything from the influence of utilitarianism on early 19th century anarchist thought to comments on the election campaigns of various parties in whatever country you live in).
Southeast US Researchers' Group, Redneck Curator Chick presiding:
We are dedicated to presenting a fair and complete portrayal of the American South as it is today on H2G2, socializing, and planning SE US meets.
H2G2 Vegetarian Society, Chairpersons Zarquon and Pegasus presiding:
The H2G2 Vegetarian Society provides a positive environment for vegetarians to find recipes and other valuable resourses, while discussing issues that affect vegetarians. All members get a link to their h2g2 home page. Come check us out!
The Virtual Supporters' Club, Referee Ormondroyd presiding:
I'd like to draw the attention of all soccer fans on h2g2 to this page I've created, which contains links to a real wealth of footie-related websites from all around the English-speaking world. If you follow the links in the Virtual Supporters' Club, you can get to web sites or pages for all 134 clubs in the English and Scottish Premierships, the Nationwide League and the Scottish League, and to lots of superb soccer news and results services. There are also links to sites dealing with women's and non-league soccer, and to the official sites of the governing bodies of the game. Not to mention the Official I Hate Manchester United website... Virtual hooliganism is strictly banned, and all true lovers of the beautiful game are welcome.
Word Gymnastics, 'Just try to shut her up' Sad, mad, or bad presiding:
Word Gymnastics is about games with words, we twist them, we make them do backflips -- hey, we even put them on the uneven parallel bars!

Well OK, we don't; but we DO play some awfully silly games -- like 'what happens next in the story?' or making up silly word definitions! If this sounds like fun to you, why don't you pop in for a visit?

Zaphodista Army of Cybernautic Liberation, Subcomandante Insurgent Deidzoeb presiding:
Zaphodistas seek to work within the existing rules of h2g2 for a reform of the BBC's new system. We will push for more democracy and freedom, away from the pre-emptive moderating, the ridiculous ban on posting URLs, the ban of languages other than English, and those stupid ******** asterisks. THE REVOLUTION WILL NOT BE TELE-TUBBIED!

Imaginary Realms

These clubs are open to anyone with an active imagination. The researchers all come together to interact with each other in imaginary settings, and each plays a part in advancing the story line. Most story lines tend to degenerate into silliness, but then, that's where the fun is.

Camelot, His, Her, or Its Majesty Pheroneous presiding:
Now open and welcoming visitors, a very simple role-playing game, or a place to have fun, in whatever disguise turns you on.
Campaign to rename Thursday "Thing", Warlord of the Thingite Clan Clive the flying ostrich presiding:
Can't quite get the hang of Thursdays? Then wallow in the pits of anguish no longer! The Thingites are a band of (not so) hardened, but certainly crazed revolutionaries campaigning to change the names of the days of the week. The campaign boasts it's own beach with artifical true-blue sky technology (it's underground) and also an infinite smiley - stout dispenser. All are welcome and any succesful sucessful applicants (which is practically anybody who walks in through the doors - whether by design or accident it doesn't matter to us) will receive a Titanium Spork and the option to pick a random title.
CHOPPERS Superhero League, leader Vestboy presiding:
Sworn to protect the innocents of H2G2 from evil, this League of Superheroes calls upon various superpowers to foil crime and mischief wherever it occurs. So if you're vaguely heroic, have a theme tune, enjoy wearing your underwear above your tights or just plain have some spare time, join CHOPPERS(Certified Heroes Opposed to Perilous Pernicious Evil Rats from STUMPED) today!
Church of the True Brownie, Archbishop Marv the Grate presiding:
CotTB is a place where people come to worship all things good about the Brownies. I am their arch bishop, and one and all is invited to join!
Crime Fighting Unit 6, Chief Constable Jachap III presiding:
Have you ever had an overwhelming urge to free the universe of villany? Well, if you have had one, then you may have joined CHOPPERS already. But if spangly tights aren't for you, and you don't like lycra, or you just need a change of scenery this is the place to come. Hopefully, if we get recognition as a organization to be in, we will be able to engage in crook catching pursuits and even (maybe, hopefully, possibly) join in with the superheroes to battle evil. Unlike Superheroes, however, we get paid, and we get less trouble from the press.
The H2G2 Free-Form Fantasy Forum, Dungeon Master YK and Company presiding:
Gotten tired of fora with just one interest? Are you a fan of Fantasy? Do you like Role-Playing?

If the answer to the above questions, or just the second two, or even the last one, is "Yes," then come on down and join the H2G2 Free-Form Fantasy Forum! (H2G2F4) Select a Character Class and a species and join in the fun! You can be a hero, a villain, a bystander who refuses to help either of the above on the grounds that you might face retribution from the other, etc. and then join in!

The Kingdom of Balwyniti, King Cthulhu presiding:
The Kingdom of Balwyniti is a Kingdom for those who like things a little bit different. Ever wanted to play mini-golf with Hamsters? Hurtle along an escalator whilst being drenched in orange juice and rained on by donuts? Search through the forest for the lost ruins? Then come to the Kingdom where oddity abounds, where the crocodiles roam free (when they aren't busy eating the hamsters) and the shovel is the accepted weapon of self-defence....or attack, if you happen to prefer....applications being accepted for subjects, nobles, and even royalty if you happen to do something particularly odd....
The Land of Peace, Prime Minister Infinity presiding:
The Land of Peace is somewhere where nothing matters and anything goes! So visit, relax and spew out anything you want about anything or nothing. A rumour came from Nowhere about an ambassador being appointed from the Alabaster House!
The H2G2 Saving the Galaxy Effort, Captain Al Boy presiding:
The H2G2 Saving The Galaxy Effort is an ongoing work of collaborative fiction/banter, based on board the Starship Esirpretne. The mission is ostensibly to save the galaxy from the doughnut-hating Horrible Somethings, but anyone who has an ear for comedy and a fondness for Science Fiction is sure of a warm welcome from either Captain Al Boy or First Officer Eomando.
The Pirate Club, Non-scurvy (I eat my greens) Sea-dog Dastardly presiding:
Have you ever found yourself running around with a stick pretending it's a sword? Have you ever been on a boat and longed to mutiny, seize control and sail off to find treasure?

If yes, this is the perfect club for you.

If no, then you probably need some excitement in your life, so this is perfect for you too.

If you join the pirate club you can fight, look for treasure, make other pirates walk the plank, or have a serious discussion on whether Sir Francis Drake was a national hero or a thieving low life.
The H2G2 Space Centre, Captain Alien presiding:
H2G2 Space Centre is the centre of all extraterrestrial traffic taking place in the realm of h2g2, and the meeting place for inter-galactic travellers (and hitch-hikers) from all around the Galaxy - and beyond. Among the features are hangar and spaceship rentals, and of course a marvellous bar, the Cheshire Grin. Don't forget, there's enough space for anyone to start a new business. See you there!!
STUMPED, Evil Genius Krylma Leader presiding:
STUMPED stands for "Sinister Thinkers Unleashing Multifarious Pernicious Evil Deeds", this is essentially a haven for thieves, villians, and generally any wrongdoers of all sorts. We supply the only thing H2G2 does not currently have: Crime! Just ask yourself: "Does my H2G2 nickname at all imply evil or craziness? Have I ever plotted something? Do you ever think of the perfect ploy to subdue those superheroes on TV or comic books? Do you find yourself watching cartoons just to take notes on the villains? Do you think you'd have fun being evil?" If you answered yes, no, or even maybe to any of these, you should seriously consider joining!
Tea on the Lawn, Hostess Trillian's Child presiding:

Imagine a large expanse of lush, green English lawn. It's the 1920s and inhibitions melt in the hot, sultry afternoon sun. Come and cool your feet on the freshly-mown grass, drink endless tea served by dozens of Jeeves-type butlers. Natter with the ladies on the terrace, talk about the decline of morals with them. Play croquet to get to know the young people of the opposite sex, take them to the arbour when it gets too hot.

Tradition rules here, stiff upper-lipped Englishness, with undertones of stifled sensuality ready to burst and explode as the relentless afternoon sun beats the men's brows and renders the girls' dresses damp and translucent

H2G2's Underworld, "Large" Tony Fenji presiding:
Once you're in, you're in for life. Members can gamble, bet, and pull off missions in order to gain more respect of other members.
The H2G2 Waterworks And Beach, Lifeguard Blubottle presiding:
The H2G2 Waterworks and Beach offer a wide range of many exciing possibilities. Whether it is relaxing by the side of the sea or in our swimming pool, searching for monsters in our sewers, or climbing or ski-ing down either of our mountains, you will be sure of an exciting time. If it is relaxation you want, then you can have either a doughnut on the beach or a drink from the beach hut, and just enjoy talking to the many researchers who visit.
Web Bug Racing, Speed Racer Greebo T. Cat presiding:
All the fun of the race track is here on H2G2. Own a racing Web Bug, train it to win, see you name on the winners board. It couldn't be easier to join, or sponsor a race. So come over and enjoy a day at the races.

Starting Your Own Club?

If you've decided you want to start your own club, but are unsure how to attract members, you can get some ideas here. And you can also get your club listed at the ultimate H2G2 directory, the Quick Reference Guide

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