The Blasted Heath : A Sanctuary for Challenged Gardeners
Created | Updated Jan 28, 2002
Well away from the rush and hurly-burly of the modern world, an old moorland packhorse trail winds along the foot of a dark, precipitous fell-side crag. Eventually, the ancient gritstone buttress gives way, briefly, to a steep-sided valley at the mouth of which is a small stone-built bridge that crosses the lively, chattering gill below. Just beyond the bridge, and blending so intimately with the towering rock face beneath which it shelters that at first only the brightly painted door is visible, is The Blasted Heath.
A Mainly Welcoming Threshold
As you draw closer, a dozen or more stone mullioned windows peek shyly at you over blowsy window boxes stuffed with ferns, petunias, nasturtiums and blue lobelia. The scrubby grass and bracken alongside the setts of the bridleway give way to a flagged pathway lined with heathers, wind-nithered dwarf conifers, and a flanking shrubbery mainly of species Rose and Rhododendron. Two pot-bound honeysuckle frame the doorway and its array of noticeboards:
- Today's Special Event H2G2 Gardeners Discussion Group (All Welcome)
- A problem shared is a problem the rest of us can have a bloody good laugh at
- Strictly no music, pets, politics, sport, religion or vine weevils
- Select from our richly varied Cordon Bleu Á la Carte menu (mainly pie)
- Choose your favorite vintage from our well-stocked cellars (homemade elderflower a speciality)
- We Accept in Payment well-rooted disease free cuttings of interesting NAMED varieties, or a pound of flesh, at our pet leopard's discretion
- Staff Required : Enquire Within
The Staff
Crossing the threshold, you find yourself in a quaint low-ceilinged saloon bar where cheerful, welcoming staff .... are occasionally in residence.
Wilfrid is supposed to be looking after the place, but is often in foreign parts for reasons best kept to himself.
Mina - Muse of Bondage has very kindly offered to venture from the torture chamber when inclined to discuss matters ecological in general, and trees in particular.
John-the-Gardener is our resident expert on scrambled eggs and plant propagation.
The Library
The Blasted Heath has a small gardening related library that patrons are welcome to peruse at their leisure.
Garden Plants
Trees
Horticultural Science
Wildlife in the Garden
- Wildlife Gardening - Getting Started
- Wildlife Gardening - Woodland Habitat
- Wildlife Gardening - Water Habitat
- Wildlife Gardening - Wildflower Meadow
- Wildlife Gardening - Mammals and Birds
- Wildlife Gardening - Insects, Amphibians and Reptiles