The Church of the True Brownie

79 Conversations

Church of the True<br/>

And the light did blinketh, and the timer did sound upon the land, and
the people did watch as the oven was open'd and the brownie descended. And
the brownie did say 'I come to you to bring unto the masses true
And the people did eat the brownie's flesh, and they did lick the
frosting. And it was good.

- from the Holy Book of Brownie

Created three years ago, the Church Of The True Brownie now has over
hundred acolytes, whom are all devoted to the worship and study of the
Brownie. The study of the Brownie has long been shrouded in secret by the
ones who know it the most. However, those who join the church find that
church's teachings allow many simple paths to enlightenment partaking in
worship of Brownie as you go.

Even though our church does not have a strict bible or scripture, the
teachings of our church are quite simple and have very few rules. However
the rules we have must be enforced with quite strictness:

  • Not partaking of the Brownie
  • Claiming that a Blondie is a Brownie

Tbe Ten Holy Suggestions

Marv the Great, one of the original members of the church and now the
archbishop of The Church Of The True Brownie first wrote down the ten
suggestions when reformeing the church into what it is today. His ten Holy
Suggestions are now the basis of all Brownie worship and teaching.

  • There should not be any Blonde Brownies.
  • There can be nuts in and on your Brownie.
  • You should put chocolate sprinkles on your Brownie.
  • Share and enjoy your brownie with others.
  • Respect all Brownies, as they are good for nutrition and well
  • Please try not to add ingrediants that detract from the unadulterated
    goodness of the Brownie.
  • Frosting is also excepted with grace.
  • Fruit is not reccomended.
  • Beer, while always good usually goes not well with the
  • Try not to swim right after consuming Brownies.
  • Historical Events of Brownie Significance

    The followers of The True Brownie, in the past, have undertaken
    of knowledge that have took them across the world. The most famous of
    crusades has been the crusade in search of the Ark of the Brownie. After
    finding a mysterious map with an 'X', they set off to find the holy

    In one of the darker moments of the church's history, the sacred fudge was
    stolen, and the members were unable to partake in the eating of the
    Fortunately, the fudge was recovered, and everyone ate Brownies again. The
    all-important Recipe is always kept in a safe place, so while ingredients
    and brownies may be stolen, the Brownie can always be prepared by the

    The Followers Of Brownie

    (Marv the Gre<br/>
at) Arch Bishop of the Church of the True Brownie by Kumabear
    The Church of The True Brownie is growing larger and larger as more and
    people convert to this most illustrious faith. Its populariity continues
    grow. There are many positions within the church that still are in need of
    filling, so if you feel the call to join our church, do not hesitate to
    in and be converted. The Church of the True Brownie propagates good clean
    living, and good cooking as a way of life. All brownies will be eaten with
    the official eating implement, The Spork (foon). Share and enjoy!

    Please note that I am working on getting the rest of the Phreds in the list... Many thanks to Old Uncle Zarniwoop for the coding
    Visit a follower...

    Marv the Grate: Arch BishopFenchurch: High PriestessGw7en: High PriestessLoonytoons: Lord WarlockMonsy: Abbess Shazz: OrganistNM: PriestShorty: ChocolyteBaron Shatturday: Lord High InquisitorZed: Master Inquisitor Inferno: Chaotic Bard Skahbey: Apostate Exorsist Extrordinaire Old Uncle Zarniwoop : Prophet of the Holy Cacao
    BeanIcarus: SeraphZonker: Lord Exchequer Sporkulious Eglon: Saint Spork of Abbot Frizzychick: Animal Keeper JimiX: Bishop of Nuts, Chocolate procurerAnonymouse: Semi Official TasterDudemeister: GoatherdTV's Frink: Saint Carameldanielt@adelaide: GuitaristMustapha: Keeper of the ApronsOrmondroyd :Prophet Jinx : AltarpersonLance Boyles: Keeper of the SporksAstrodome Goth :Tithe CollectorWowbagger :Feind Extrodinare Cafram: Crumb ManagementNick O' Teen : Shaper of BrowniesEt Cetera is now Lisa : Chocolyte Furby Killer: Furby Exterminator: Psychosomatic Pseudo`Nymph : ChocolyteFire is Good :Oven StarterPeta :Community Brownie Distributor Savior of the Paper Clips :Office keeper and Third assistant inquisitor Santrapenius V: ChocolyteIrons : Liason to CanadaW.R. Phang Dental Surgeon : Dentist : kats-eyes : Server of BrowniesIrving Washington : Knight Protector of the BrownieAsteroid Lil :>: Apostate (She likes Blonde Brownies) Joker : MissionaryNDVV : Baker of the holy BrownieCaptain Armadillo :Random Street Lunatic Sandwich Maker : Commisary SupervisorSpanner Grrl : Propaganda PropagatorHelena : Damn Fine WomanMultivac : Official ApplianceResearcher Horay II : DancerOne Wayne Craig Hugh~ Owen : >: Long name persoGidgetGirl : DishwasherTowel Master : Choir ConducterJoe aka Arnia : Non Spokesman for the CotTB Demon Drawer : Kepper of the after Brownie beer Alaska : High Male Priestess of Brownies Luna, Queen of (my) Hearts: Lady in Waiting: Courtesy 38 :The man with the Shake, Hangover Curist Linus : Keeper of the Barfridge TempratureMari-rae:Missionary the Forth Bluebottle: Missionary Who Has A Worrying Fondness For MatchesLethe: Little lost soulBaron "Bear Thing" Slide: Shoe Polisher/Misguided Crusader

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