From this day to the ending of the world,
But we in it shall be remember'd;
We few, we happy few, we band of brothers;
For he to-day that sheds his blood with me
Shall be my brother [...]
So far, 100% of h2g2's Presidents have been non-Hillbilly males. It is time for a change. It does not appear that any of the other candidates offer what Hypatia brings - a hillbilly charm, humility, a certain grace and, for god's sakes some dignity. These are not only qualities lacking in other campaigns, they are what h2g2 needs right now more than anything.
Some candidates have been sitting out in the sun too long, bathing in their own self righteousness and their hokey, odd little beliefs. While Hypatia believes that tolerance is among the most key values we must possess, she also believes that we shouldn't let nuts steer the ship of state.
General Campaign Info
Doo, doo, doo, doo, doo
Don't let the Vogons come for you-
Doo, doo, doo, doo, doo
Vote Two Oh Oh Oh Forty-two -
- Party- Ozark
- Presidential Nominee- Hypatia
- Vice Presidential Nominee- Jodan
- Campaign Manager - Asteroid Lil
- Deputy Campaign Manager - Spynxxx
- Head of Security- U28338
- Avian Advisor- U123301
- Spinmeister- U95721
- Surgeon General - U185843
- Cartesian Coordinator1 - U152404
- Chief Procurer of Doughnuts, Chocolates, and Other Calorie-Laden Foodstuffs - U216391
- Lord Chancelor of Environmental Complaining - U215480
- Grace, charm, charisma? - Check, check, check
- Favorite President- Harry Truman
- Poet?- You bet your grandmother's silverware she is!
- Favorite Candidate for Presidential Army - The Evil Army of H2G2
- Broadcast - here
Hip Hip for Hyp! Supporter Folks...
- U183682 - and Orchid
Platform and other Propaganda
You can see the Ozark Party platform on this page.
A poetic form of our campaign platform is here
A nice little story that accompanies the above two items makes up the Ozark party political broadcast. Read it.
This is quizzical's lovely explanation of why she voted for Hypatia and the Ozarks. It has a lot to do with gardening, but surprisingly little to do with sheep.
Maybe you like most of our campaign, but decide for one reason or another that you can't vote for us (probably that sheep). Perhaps you've declared your support for us, but want to know which other candidates we consider to be worthy of your secondary, tertiary and fourth-i-ary... votes. Therefore, we carefully scrutinized the candidates in the field, their platforms and their promises and hereby present this list of approved candidates for the perusal of our supporters-
Do Your Part
If you feel the same energy and optimism about the future of our fair site, please join Hypatia in the conversation forums below. Subscribing to this entry, adding a link to this page in your nickname and writing a journal entry recommending Hypatia are all welcome.
And vote! Vote early, vote often and bribe if you can. The page with all the proper instructions is here. Finally, say the pledge of Hypatia (by EvilClaw) before you go to bed each night-
I pledge allegiance to the Hypatia
of the United Researchers of Hootoo,
and to the website for which she stands,
One Guide, under Adams,
with and ness for all.