Cleethorpes – the 'thorpes (Old English word meaning village) of Clee' – is twinned with Königswinter, Germany.

On a map of England, half way down the east coast, there is a feature in the River Humber which has the look of a curved finger, pointing towards the land. This feature is in East Yorkshire, but the 'fingertip' (known locally as Spurn Point) points directly to Cleethorpes, a town which started off in the county of Lincolnshire, until the county became South Humberside. This was never popular among the locals, affectionately known as Meggies, and much campaigning brought about the new name of North East Lincolnshire.

This seaside resort has been a favourite with tourists and day-trippers, usually from South Yorkshire, since 1863 when the railway line was extended to Cleethorpes, as it is within easy reach of their homes (just over an hour on the train from Doncaster). The train line runs parallel to the beach, ensuring a good view upon entering the town.

During the summer season there is an open-top bus which travels the length of the seafront. From the top of this bus you can see as far as the lighthouse at Spurn Point as it takes you past Ross Castle, the Leisure Centre and the Boating Lake, before finally turning around at Pleasure Island.

The Beach

The River Humber ebbs and flows, providing excellent entertainment for paddlers, swimmers and speedboat enthusiasts. Until the last decade Cleethorpes had one of the worst seawater qualities in the country, regularly failing EC Directives. Now it is one of the cleanest. To decide for yourself whether it is up to standard for bathing check the Environment Agency website. The beach is regularly cleaned by the local council and there is a special area for families where it is forbidden for local residents to walk their dogs.

There is a selection of rides along the stretch of beach opposite Wonderland, including the Big Wheel, but they are only active during the summer season. Deckchairs are available to rent and you can treat yourself to a donkey ride along the beach. More adventurous types can take a trip in the sea-jeep. Try to visit the promenade one night when the Moon is full: watching the Moon rise and its reflection casting the image of a silver ribbon across the water is quite a magical sight that never fails to stir the soul, no matter how many times it is viewed.

The Beached Whale

Over 100 years ago, a passing whale made the huge mistake of swimming into the Humber estuary. When the tide went out, the whale floundered and was beached. The locals could do nothing to help the poor creature, and it died. There was no heavy equipment available to tow away the remains, nor the means to bury it, so the seagulls fed on the rotting carcass for weeks. It was jokingly reported that the revolting stench could be smelt from as far away as Yorkshire. When only the skeleton remained, the jawbone of the unfortunate creature was used to create an archway in Sydney Park on Brereton Avenue, where there's also a plaque detailing the story of its demise.

Beware!

If you should spot anything on the beach that looks like a mine, then it probably is one. Inform the local authorities and do not attempt to take it home as a souvenir. That means don't touch! Mines have been washed up in the past, albeit rarely. The mines were deposited during the Second World War and were supposed to float. Some of them sank to the seabed; it is these that eventually get washed ashore by the incoming tides. Chances are the most interesting things you will find on Cleethorpes beach are beautiful shells, seaweed, driftwood and dead crabs.

Swimming and the Tide

Red flags warn unwary swimmers of fast incoming tides. Do not attempt to walk out towards the old forts¹ that can be seen from the beach when the tide is out. The incoming tide will cut you off and you will become stranded. Drownings are rare but even one is too many. If anyone gets into difficulty, help is on hand as there is a permanent lifeboat station run by the RNLI situated on the south end of the promenade.

Salt Marsh

Behind the Leisure Centre is an area of salt marsh spreading across the beach. Ward councillor Chris Shaw claims the salt marsh will devastate local trade, which relies on beach tourism, but ecologists say it's important for the wildlife. The North East Lincolnshire Council have undertaken a six-year study of the area and taking that time to put together a report. Nathan Vear, environmental improvement officer for the NELC, says the area deserves a nature conservation order. According to Ecology officer Mike Sleight, there are over 80 different types of fish which swim through the Humber Estuary, and 140,000 birds – representing 60 species – visited the area during the latter part of 2007. Obviously the council aren't going to send in a JCB to clear the salt marsh until their study is complete, which adds to the frustration of local sandy-beach lovers and business people who depend on tourism, who are worried about the future of Cleethorpes beach.

Kite Festival

In 1998 a kite festival was held for the first time. It took place as the result of an idea by kite enthusiasts Eddie and Anne Megrath. Since then the festival has become an annual event, attracting visitors from far and wide.

The Promenade

The Promenade was originally built in 1885 by the Manchester, Sheffield and Lincolnshire Railway Company, but it has been renovated and reinforced since. It is over a mile long and 65 feet wide, with steps leading down to the beach at regular intervals. Along this promenade runs the 0° Meridian Line which is commemorated with a plaque beyond the Boating Lake. There is plenty of parking space along the length of 'the Prom' which is free for those with valid parking cards for disabled people, but there is an hourly charge for all other vehicles. This area is regularly patrolled by council attendants who check parking ticket times and will issue fines if the time paid for parking has expired. They have been observed to stand by cars looking at their wristwatches, counting down the minutes, so it's fair to say they are very keen. As the fine is £60, you have been warned!

Benches are provided the full length of the promenade, facing the beach. On a clear day you can see the lighthouse at Spurn Point and watch the ships inch their way along the estuary towards the ports of Immingham and South Killingholme, so bring your binoculars. When the tide is in, it can overflow onto the promenade. This is especially exciting during a storm, but you should keep a safe distance as it's possible to be swept in.

The Railway and a Royal Connection

The railway line was extended to Cleethorpes in 1863, when the newly-widowed Queen Victoria was monarch. The line terminates at Cleethorpes, and the station is the original shell, including the attractive four-faced clock tower which occasionally reads the correct time. Updating and improvements have been carried out to the interior, including the installation of a pub and a ticket office/waiting room. The station toilets are kept locked due to constant vandalism so if you're caught short exit the station and head up the slope where you'll emerge opposite the High Street. To your left is O'Neill's, a pub with a loo, and across the road is the Swashbuckle, also a pub with a loo. If you think that's a bit cheeky, the nearest public facilities are based in St Peter's Avenue car park, a good few blocks away, and they are reminiscent of the concrete shelters on the beach which used to house lone look-outs during the war, and smell just as bad.

On 23 January, 2004, the Royal Train pulled into Cleethorpes station and out alighted monarch-in-waiting HRH Prince Charles with a few of his staff. The Prince of Wales was visiting the surrounding area, including touring a factory at Great Coates. First of all though, he left the station by a normally-locked gate which accesses the promenade and went over to meet and greet some dignitaries and other members of the public who had bothered to show up (around 20 people). He took the time to speak to each person and shake the hands of those who proffered them, before speeding off in his chauffeur-driven Bentley which had been backed up the promenade very carefully.

Wonderland

Where the train line ends a gambler's haven is found. 'Wonderland' is a noisy area filled with slot machines which will eat your loose change faster than a donkey being fed carrots. This is a great place for people who like hot dogs, hamburgers, candy floss, doughnuts, seaside rock and whipped ice-cream. On any hot day in July or August the aroma of fried onions can be smelled as far away as Donna Nook, and makes a pleasant change from eau de Pyewipe.

The huge undercover building at the end of the promenade used to be home to rides such as the Ghost Train, but now houses the Sunday market, where anything from factory rejects and copied designer goods can be purchased. Keep a tight hold of your wallet, your children and avoid taking small animals, this place gets very busy.

The Pier

The Pier, now less than half its original size, is one of the landmarks of Cleethorpes. It was built in 1872 by Head Wrightson at a cost of £8,000. It used to host shows and attracted stars of yesteryear like Flanagan and Allen, Diana Dors, Frankie Vaughn, Ken Dodd, and Des O'Connor. During the sixties you could purchase a ticket for a variety show which featured several 'turns' complete with compère and a line of dancing girls who performed different routines between each act. For example Mike and Bernie Winters were regular returnees whose standing joke was that the local (now much missed) dancehall, the Winter Gardens, had been named by a Cleethorpes landlady who had very fond memories of their father. While the audience were laughing one of the dancing girls would wander onstage and offer them a drink, and as she teetered off one of them would comment to the other about the views in Cleethorpes improving every year.

Sometimes 'talent' shows would be organised which usually featured audience members who weren't afraid to be laughed off the stage or ridiculed by the compère. If this sort of caper took place during a 'one star' show, it wasn't unusual for the star in question to join in the fun. In 1961 a six-year-old girl was the youngest participant and the compère struggled in vain to maintain control of the contest while all hell was breaking loose behind a curtain at the back of the stage. As the compère kept pulling the curtain aside to catch out the perpetrators, the little girl continued singing 'Cockles and Mussels' amid the shrieks of dancing girls being chased behind the curtain and the audience howling with laughter. When the audience were invited to clap loudest for the entrant they liked best, the little girl got a rousing cheer and she went home clutching her prize, an LP soundtrack of Hans Christian Andersen featuring Danny Kaye, personally autographed by the night's star turn, Flanagan and Allen.

This sad relic of a once-great Pier no longer echoes to the sound of laughter, because it was sold to a businessman who converted it into a nightclub called Pier 39. It hosts discos, live bands like The Bluetones and Ultrabeat, and visiting star DJs like Dave Pearce, as well as the occasional celebrity guest like Michael Knight of Hollyoaks. Pier 39 has been been voted 'best club on the coast' because of its oustanding quality in sound system and lighting. If you're not interested in clubbing, there is nothing to recommend for the visitor barring a visual reminder of what used to be.

Pier Gardens

Parallel to the promenade and beach, just past the Pier, is a wonderful walkway known as the 'Pier Gardens'. This delightful haven contains all the features of a park, with benches to rest and admire the views across the Humber. This is the place to consume your mandatory lunch of fish and chips, although watch out for diving seagulls who will attempt to steal your chips. Be sure to sample the whipped ice-cream; ask for a '99' and you will have a chocolate flake added to your treat. There is also a crazy-golf course to amuse granddad and young children, several snack shops, a children's indoor play area including a bowling alley, and an aesthetic artificial waterfall which is floodlit at night. You can walk south towards Ross Castle, or mount the (many) steps to gain access to the castle and Alexandra Road/Sea View Street.

Ross Castle

Ross Castle was built by the Railway Company in 1885, and named after the then secretary of the Railway Company, Edward Ross. Due to Health and Safety worries the castle was closed to the public for some years, but a two-year renovation plan in 2007/8 saw the castle have a complete facelift and it has now been rededicated and reopened. The view from the top of Ross Castle up and down the promenade is fantastic and it is well worth the climb, but be warned, it's a steep incline. Across from the entrance of Ross Castle in Dolphin Gardens is a brand new bronze statue in the figure of an airman, with a plaque of dedication in memory of Air Force personnel losses.

Sea View Street

Opposite Ross Castle is a wonderful find for the visitor who loves to browse around 'olde-worlde' shops. Sea View Street is extremely narrow but it boasts the original buildings from two centuries ago. There are two original banks, a pet shop, boutiques, newsagents and several original pubs. The bottom of this road leads into the rear end of St Peter's Avenue.

St Peter's Church

About a block up 'the Avenue' is St Peter's Church, the parish church of Cleethorpes. Here is the war memorial where the Remembrance Sunday/Poppy Day ceremony is held each November to honour the fallen. Inside the church is a special stained glass window of the Normandy Veterans Association badge. The NVA memorial book is on display beneath the special window, but that is stored inside a locked glass cabinet so it can be viewed but not touched. Special arrangements should be made to access a specific name or date which must be done by appointment with the clergy or his staff; their office is across the road at St Peter's Church Hall.

Alexandra Road

Brighton Slipway, which connects the promenade with Alexandra Road, has a unique 'tide clock'. Along Alexandra Road you can marvel at the round-the-year floral displays in Dolphin Gardens which have won Cleethorpes many awards in the 'In Bloom' regional competitions since 1996. In 2007 alone, Cleethorpes was awarded four prestigious national awards by the Royal Horticultural Society for their 'In Bloom' campaign.

On one block is Cleethorpes Library which is the modern building built to replace the old Cleethorpes Library which stood at the very top of Isaac's Hill. This listed building could not be converted to accommodate people with physical disabilities so it had to be replaced. The new library is ultra-modern with many facilities and helpful staff.

Highcliff Road

At the top of Alexandra Road is the building where used to be the Talk of the Town nightclub, now demolished. In its place stands a magnificent glass-fronted block of flats with retail outlets taking up the ground floor. Estate agents rave about the view from the topmost flats. No doubt to enable enjoyment of said vista they will furnish you with the phone number of a window cleaner with specialist high-rise equipment for the constant seagull excrement removal.

Travelling south you will pass many hotels and B&B establishments. With their magnificent sea views these are the most expensive places to book; other, more reasonably-priced accommodation is available for much of the year and most are within walking distance of the beach.

The Kingsway

Once you reach Queens Parade you'll see a modern block of flats built on the land that once housed the Lifeboat Hotel. This was a sad loss to the town, as many ex-pats have fond memories of the place. Cross the road to the Kingsway Hotel and you are now on the stretch of road known as the Kingsway. You'll pass Hotel 77 and be heading for the Winter Gardens, one of the iconic symbols of Cleethorpes. Here there used to be the world-famous Bag's Ball every Wednesday, tea dances for pensioners every Friday and concerts as and when. Queen played here, before they were famous.

Sadly the Winter Gardens now exists only in people's memories and on photographs. There was such an outcry locally when the popular landmark was demolished in 2007 that the buyers pulled out of the deal and the plot of land was fenced off and left derelict. Since then regular complaints spurred the council into action and plans are afoot to build a doctor's surgery, attached chemist and retail outlets.

Kings Road

Diagonally opposite the old Winter Gardens plot is the Leisure Centre, which was built on the land once occupied by the outdoor bathing pool. It is council run, and boasts the usual facilities which require membership. Once past the Leisure Centre, just before the Boating Lake is a paddling pool, with an adequate seating area for adults who wish to sunbathe while their offspring work off their energies in the pool. No dogs are allowed in this area.

Boating Lake

At the Boating Lake (where you pay a fee to park, but no admittance fee), you may rent a paddle boat and delight your family with your rowing skills. Don't worry, the water isn't very deep. Many ducks, geese and swans live here and it is a good idea to take last week's loaf of bread to feed these hungry birds. There is a bandstand here where shows are performed – check the 'What's On' guide at the Grimsby Evening Telegraph.

See if you can spot another local landmark, the Boy with the Leaking Boot. The famed statue and symbol of Cleethorpes was donated to the town in 1915 by John Carlbom. You'll need eagle eyes to locate The Boy though. He used to stand in a pond surrounded by flowers at the end of the promenade, directly opposite the Winter Gardens. Unfortunately he was vandalised, repaired, and vandalised again so many times that the council decided to move him to a more inaccessible location, at the top of a waterfall on one of the islands in the middle of the Boating Lake. Since then he's been safe, even though he can no longer be admired up close. Along the back of the Boating Lake is a miniature railway track, which runs almost as far as the Leisure Centre. The miniature train runs at a steady 10mph and is guaranteed to amuse the children.

The Wellow Hotel

Across the road from the Boating Lake stands the Wellow Hotel which is family-friendly, having an outdoor play area with special cushioned flooring in full view of the family room where parents and carers can sit and drink in peace. There's a pub/function room which is kept adults only, but the restaurant at the rear welcomes all. There's a children's menu and baby changing room. Meals here are excellent and fantastic value for money at two adult meals for £8 (in 2009). There's adequate free parking facilities for patrons of the Wellow.

Other Attractions

Next door to the Wellow is a fairly new addition to the attractions of Cleethorpes, the Ten Pin Bowling Alley. The next building along is the independent cinema The Parkway. This was very much welcomed as the last cinema in Cleethorpes, the derelict ABC on Grimsby Road, was demolished in the eighties and a McDonald's built in its place. The Parkway has nine screens and hosts live acts, including a pantomime, and touring shows. They also host a 'Senior Screen' on a Tuesday morning, offering a choice of three recently-released films at a reduced rate. There is also a mother and toddler morning. The whole building is wheelchair-friendly with adequate provision for mobility scooters to drive directly through to the selected screen room. The plentiful staff are helpful, efficient and friendly. With two blocks of toilets each for female and male, plus disability facilities, you never need to queue for the loo. In 2007 the Parkway cinema won a prestigious award for 'Best New Cinema in the UK'.

Across the road from the Parkway is Meridian Point, containing a drive-thru McDonald's with a KFC right next door. Where once was a wildlife haven is now concreted and tarmacked to cater for the multitudes of visitors each year. Opposite the fast food outlets are a range of shops as well as a Play Towers and a Keep Fit/Gym/Fitness Suite place which you can go in and browse but you have to be a member to use the facilities.

Pleasure Island

Please note: Pleasure Island closed down in 2016

Pleasure Island family theme park was built in 1993 on the site of the old Cleethorpes Adventure Land & Zoo which was closed in the late 1960s. Pleasure Island is open between April and September, and also autumn half-term (usually the last week of October) from 10am until 5pm. One entrance fee, £15 per person in 2008, covers all rides and shows. Visitors with special needs and/or physical disabilities are welcomed. Wheelchairs can be booked in advance and staff are on hand to help access most rides and attractions.

Every entrant is given a map of the park which should be studied to plan your day. There are shows which start hourly, such as the parrot show. These well-trained birds perform a variety of acts including high-wire bicycle rides and feats of balance which appear to defy the laws of gravity. The sea-lion performance, also, should not be missed. Beware of sitting too close to the front of this show unless you are wearing waterproof clothing, or at the very least don't forget to take a towel!

The rides are all height-restricted for safety reasons; there are special rides for toddlers and small children, and play areas with a café and toilet/changing facilities for families with babies. Roller coasters abound for the more daring.

A magical ride for parents to take their children on is the 'Sweet Factory' ride. This is based upon the film Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. You sit in a circular boat and are transported along the 'river' viewing all aspects of sweet-making, all the while having delicious smells like vanilla and chocolate wafted towards you. As you leave this ride, the only exit is via the souvenir shop. Worth a look around but certainly not inexpensive.

McCormacks Family Bar inside the theme park's boundary serves alcohol, and hot and cold meals throughout the day with a children's menu also available.

Shopping

No doubt you will want to take Cleethorpes souvenirs home for family and friends – Cleethorpes rock always goes down well. The High Street has a large car park which is free for disability badge holders, otherwise you'll need to purchase and display a ticket commencing at one hour minimum. There's a Barclays Bank with external cash machine and the main Post Office which also sells cards and Cleethorpes souvenirs. Further up High Street going towards the beach is a taxi rank, a few small shops which change retailers often, with the exception of the fishmongers which has been in business at least 50 years, and the usual pubs and nightclubs.

At the end of the High Street you turn left to head for the railway station, or veer right and turn into Alexandra Road, which hosts the Dolphin Gardens. Opposite Brighton Slipway is the Dolphin Hotel and then there's a line of arcades, charity shops, a fish and chip restaurant, a café or four, a souvenir shop, a jewellers, an antique shop, the Tourist Information Centre, Cleethorpes Collectibles and a stamp trading centre.

Twice a week, on Wednesdays and Saturdays, there is an outdoor market in the Market Square. This area has a bookies, a taxi waiting room, several eateries like Spaghetti Junction, curry houses and a fried chicken outlet. On non-market days the parking in this area is free but limited during peak times, so check the sign when you park. Just around the corner is St Peter's Avenue; on your way there you'll pass a lovely little corner shop called Frenchies which sells milk shakes and a multitude of ice-cream flavours so vast they are still being researched. Also recommended are their bacon butties which are cooked when ordered, not fast-food but worth the wait. Just along from that is Robson's Fruit Market, an old family firm which has been in business at least 40 years. Here you can purchase locally produced fruit and veg, and fresh flowers; the staff will happily create a bouquet or other floral arrangement to your requirements.

St Peter's Avenue, the main shopping centre, boasts the usual estate agents, shoe shops, chemists (Boots, Broadburns and Wilkinsons), clothes shops, value store, two supermarkets (Sainsburys and Somerfields), two butchers supplied by local farmers, a bakery, a coffee house, a large furnishings store, building societies and banks. Highly recommended place to eat here is the Ocean Fish Restaurant, where you can queue at the front for takeaway or go through to the seating area at the rear to be served at a table. They do cater for parties and provide a winter special menu out of season.

Further in town (take the A1098 – Queens Parade/Taylor's Avenue then turn into Middlethorpe Road) is a parade of shops including Middlethorpe Bun Shop at 86 Middlethorpe Road. This is a local bakery selling their own bread buns, cakes, iced buns, flans, pies etc. They will make up any sandwich filling requested so long as they have the ingredients, supplied in their own white or brown baps. They also supply hot drinks and will warm soup, pizza and pies if required. Up to Christmas they produce their own Viennese mince pies which are highly recommended. They will take large orders for parties, and create personalised birthday cakes with adequate notice and payment of a deposit.

At the end of Taylor's Avenue is a roundabout, the second exit (still the A1098) will take you into Tesco's car park including petrol station. There are other shops surrounding the car park, namely a Pets At Home and Instore. Tesco parking is free, there's a café and there are three cash machines constantly in use.

Head back to the roundabout and take the first exit (the A1031) and you'll come to Pennell's Plant Centre which is a nice, but expensive, place to browse.

Eat, Drink and be Merry!

Places to Eat

Recommendations include:

• Beckett's, Market Place (takeaway, fish & chips)
• Steels Corner House, Market Place (award-winning fish & chips)
• The Ocean Fish Restaurant, St Peter's Avenue
• Marple's Café, Sea View Street
• The Smugglers, Highcliff Road
• Blundell Park Hotel, Grimsby Road
• The Wellow Hotel, Kings Road
• The Trawlerman, North Sea Lane (just past Pleasure Island, on the border with Humberston)
• The Kingsway Hotel, Kingsway (Silver Service)

Avoid the 'greasy spoon' cafés which advertise fish and chips for about £1 – these are the places where you will be served a triangle of previously frozen cod and frozen chips, which are probably not even defrosted.

Places to Drink

• Blundell Park Hotel, Grimsby Road
• The Coffee Shop, St Peter's Avenue
• The Smugglers, Highcliff Road
• Willy's Wine Bar, Highcliff Road
• The Wellow Hotel, Kings Road

Places to Stay

There are dozens of Bed and Breakfast establishments situated close to the main shopping centre and the beach. Prices vary depending on distance from the seafront, although most will offer discounts for families. Visitors who return to Cleethorpes year after year tend to stay in the same bed and breakfast and come to regard the landlady as a close personal friend – just about every house on Isaac's Hill is Bed and Breakfast accommodation. Hotels are more expensive but if you are planning a celebration somewhere special then the Kingsway Hotel is highly recommended.

If you don't mind staying in a caravan you can rent accommodation at the Humberston Fitties, just the other side of Pleasure Island.

Well-known People Born in Cleethorpes

• Henry Hugh Bancroft (1904 - 88) – music teacher, composer and organist at five cathedrals
• Stephen Bennett (born 1959) – professional golfer (won the 1985 Tunisian Open and the 1986 Zimbabwe Open)
• Big Daddy aka Shirley Crabtree (1930 - 1997) – wrestler
• Timothy 'Nibbs' Carter (born 1966) – bassist (heavy metal band Saxon)
• Peter Collinson (1936 - 80) – film director: Tomorrow Never Comes; Straight on Till Morning; The Italian Job; Up The Junction
• Bob Cottam (born 1944) – cricketer: Hampshire, Northamptonshire and England
• Michele Dotrice (born 1948) – actress
• Vivean Gray (1924-2016) – actress
• Patricia Hodge (born 1946) – actress
• Christopher Paul Roberts (1951 - 77) – cricketer: Lincolnshire, Worcestershire and England
• Carl Ross (1901 - 86) – entreprenuer: founder of the Ross Group
• Haydn Taylor (1897 - 1962) – channel swimmer, also the first man to swim the River Humber
• Rod Temperton (1947 - 2016) – keyboard player, music producer and songwriter: 'Thriller' and 'Rock With You' for Michael Jackson; 'Boogie Nights' and 'Always & Forever' for Heatwave; 'Lovelines' and 'If We Try' for Karen Carpenter
• Patrick Wymark (1926 - 70) – actor

Actor John Hurt spent some of his childhood in Cleethorpes as his father, the Rev AA Hurt, was Vicar of Cleethorpes during the 1950s. His parish church was St Aiden's on Grimsby Road.

Grimsby

It is impossible to separate Grimsby and Cleethorpes; if they were one town it would be large enough to be called a city. Many times suggestions have been made about joining the two towns but a new name could never be agreed upon and the plans were shelved.

An outstanding landmark, the Grimsby Dock Tower can be seen from Cleethorpes and the surrounding area. It stands over 300 feet tall, and is held in deep affection with the locals, especially on their way home after a long journey. The Tower can be seen as far away as the Lincolnshire Wolds – more than 20 miles away.

Grimsby Town Football Club, the 'Mariners', are one of those rare football teams who never play at home. Their stadium, known as Blundell Park, can be found off Grimsby Road, Cleethorpes. At the end of Grimsby Road is a crossroads manned by traffic lights – cross these and you are on Cleethorpe Road, Grimsby. Just across these lights to the right is the Grimsby Docks, and to the left is the building which houses the Grimsby Telegraph  – the local newspaper.

How to get to Cleethorpes

• By train  – Change at Doncaster for the Cleethorpes station. It won't matter if you fall asleep because the line ends at Cleethorpes.

• By car  – The M180 then the A180, follow the signs for Grimsby. As you approach Grimsby you will see signs for Cleethorpes. Follow those. If you don't like motorways, head east and go up the coast (or down, depending on which direction you started from).

• By coach  – Ask the driver for a ticket to Cleethorpes.

Interesting Things to do

Perhaps you are revisiting the area and wish to skip the things you've seen before, or just aren't into the tourist routine. In that case, try a nature walk but be aware the distance logged from Pyewipe to North Somercotes is 19 miles so you should be adequately prepared, that means telling someone who isn't going along what your planned route is and your estimated finish time and let them know when you've finished. If that sort of ramble is too much for you then head for Donna Nook where there's a seal sanctuary. Nearby Louth is well worth visiting as well. Further down the coast road (heading south) are Mablethorpe, Ingoldmells, Chapel St Leonards and Skegness, which has its own attractions; notable are the Skegness Natureland Seal Sanctuary and Butlins holiday camp.

In Conclusion

If your idea of a good holiday is somewhere relatively cheap to stay with plenty for all the family to do, then Cleethorpes is worth a visit. Should you like the town enough to want to move there, you will be pleasantly surprised by the low cost of the properties for sale.