What the Dinosaur (VII)

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A LONG TIME AGO IN A TOWN FAR, FAR AWAY


Well, actually 'a long time ago' is a bit deceptive because this was written in May 2019, which isn't that long ago at all at time of writing really. Mind you, one character is a Neovenator dinosaur from 125 million years ago, and that counts as a long time ago (but I say '60 million years ago' more than once as everyone knows that that is when the dinosaurs were wiped out and is a nice, short number that fits in speech bubbles easily, and saves me trying to explain that actually the Cretaceous began 145 million years ago, lasted about 80 million years and ended 66 million years ago). As for it being a town far, far away - well again that depends on where you are. I mean it is my home town, but if you live in, say, Pittsburgh, well, it is 3,693 miles to Sandown, Isle of Wight. And actually it is the Yaverland end of Sandown, which is 3,694 miles from Pittsburgh.

You know what, this introduction really doesn't work. I'll tie a knot in my handkerchief to remind me to change it before I send this into The Post.

Episode VII of a 20-part adventureWhy is there a knot in my handkerchief? When will the dinosaur museum realise, 'One of our dinosaurs is missing?' Where have I heard the name 'Dr Beeching' before? How will readers react when they realise that in reality the phonebox near the museum is not a K6 as portrayed in the drawing above, but a KX? How disappointed is everyone that the charming story of a dinosaur has been rudely interrupted by the plot? Now that the police and their helicopters have been notified about the dinosaur danger, how long until the police and armed forces arrive and shoot the helpless creature dead? How many soldiers and tanks can be brought to the Isle of Wight in a day1? Is it true that dinosaurs' thick, scaly skin is impervious to all known explosives - except dinomite? Will any questions be answered in next week's installment of What the Dinosaur?
What the Dinosaur
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VI - VII - VIII - IX - X

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1Hovertravel have two 78-seater hovercraft. WightLink has two high-speed passenger ferries that can each carry 260 people as well as six car ferries, St Faith carries 142 cars, 12 lorries and 722 passengers, St Clare carries 186 cars and 878 passengers, the three Wight class vessels each carry 360 passengers and 65 cars and WightLink flagship Victoria of Wight carries 178 cars and 1,208 passengers. Red Funnel have three passenger vessels that each carry 275 passengers, three Raptor class vehicle ferries that each carry 892 passengers and 220 cars as well as a freight vessel that carries 12 HGVs.

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