h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

HAAAAAAAAAAR UMPHHHHHHH!

Couldn't have put it better meself old boy

The Coughin' Tecwin you say?
I should ask of it one of my dear old friends. No matter where in Great Britain, or for that matter in whole Europe, he was he knew a good pub just around the corner. As a matter of fact, after he dies owners of the pubs he DID NOT go to will make a fortune. All lads will simply run to find out why were not couple of these particular pubs visited by that gentelman.

Hmmmmmmm...still tryin` to grasp yer meanin` there, Leggers, or am I lookin` too deep?
Whatever, there`s ALWAYS a good pub round the corner in the UK..it`s just knowin` which corner,though I must say the Coughin Tecwin dont come in that category...sound like a bloody student pub..can`t stand bloody student pubs..full of bloody students...HAAAARRRRRUUUUUMMMMMPH

quite ... can't stand those blasted infernal student pubs. galling, appalling, absolutely and utterly distasteful. Good Lord, the very idea! BAH!

dear Lurcher
you did look too deeply into my story that I told when I had a little more of than I should have.
I also agree about those student bars, no matter if they are international or simply one nationed. Those rookies have no clue what so ever on how to have a good time. For them it is getting drunk to the point where it won't matter who you mate with, a chicken or a girl.
Bloody students, and people say that they are our future, un-bloody-believable.

I say, steady on old chap, let`s not get carried away, wot!!
Don`t let`s think the worst of the younger generation. They are our future, God `elp us.


Grim, aint it?

Pass the bottle, old chap....oblivion cures everything..

You know what they say don't you chaps?

Let the bally students run the country - while they still know EVERYTHING!!



Bassers

I thought we ran the bally country Bassers

well you see deal ol' chap. From my point of view we don't run the coutry at all times, that would be too much work and not enough of tea time. We rather here to make real important decisions such as how much of Mac Lurchers to produce or which country to invade. You know, decisions not understood by regular people.

*confused*

Regular people you say ? Never met any myself - wouldn't want to of course.

Regular people are kind of like out waitors' waitors. And of course you don't want to meet them, why we can get some of their commoness. We don't what for that to happen now, do we.

Jolly right - don't want any of that nonsence rubbing orff....



Bassers

ARRHRRUMMMMH,

this is more than just a bit awkward chaps, however, it must be put in the open. Yes, I'm afraid so. I've got the most peculiar feeling that there is an imposter in our midst. I'm afraid it really is more than a feeling. This creatures posts here are most peculiar, most odd. By George, this is not an easy thing at all but it is incumbant upon us to out such persons, eh? I believe the rules are clear on the matter, wot? Dashed awful business.

HARRRUUUMPPPPHHH!

*bangs gavel several times*

ORDER ! ORDER !

A Quisling you say .... here in the Chaps Club, the last bastion of Honour. Well I ......

*swoons*

MY GOD
could you please tell us dear "?" who is the imposter? I hope that that person will be panished for his imposturous dids.
By god, I need a drink. why, where is that Mac Lurcher?

Someone saying we`ve been infiltrated, is that what you`re saying, what!!
Doesn`t surprise me though, thinking about it, can`t understand a lot of the things I`m hearin`. The language seems different, somehow, sort of forrin.
Could be me `earin aid on the blink praps,I dont know. Wish old Scrotum was back, a chap knew where he stood then. Gaggin` for a drink maybe, but he knew where he stood.

HAAAAARRRRRUUUUUMMMMMPH

*there is the squeel of wheelbarrow tyres pushed to their limit outside the Committee Rooms*

Oi gart 'ere as farst as oi cud ..... oi 'eard thar's a Plant in the Club !!!

Oh prompt work dear fellow! Catch the blighter unawares left hook ,over the hip and straight into the wheelbarrow.You toddle off and I'll phone for the bally officers of the law.....
Three things spring to mind in the way of obstacles,though. One locate the stool pigeon ,as it were.Two get it sozzled enough not to notice the manhandlin' and Three who is going to do the heavy stuff.Dicky tickers or old war wounds put most of us out of the picture.Lurchers used to spar with the best of them in Bethnal Green in the old days so he tells me,I vote he does the heaving .Now Hog make yourself scarce until I give you the signal.

Yes Ma'am ...... I'll go and stand in the corner and be grubby until Oi'm needed then.