A Conversation for Red Dwarf
The Captains office-sign up here!
Ace Rimmer [pretending] Posted Jul 22, 2004
*hands over a nine feet tall stack of papers*
Sign these.
The Captains office-sign up here!
Mort - a middle aged Girl Interrupted Posted Jul 22, 2004
A new member?
Are they mad??!!!
The Captains office-sign up here!
[...] Posted Jul 22, 2004
*appears in door*
Anyone wanna take a vote on that?
The Captains office-sign up here!
smeggyheads - RPG, yey! Posted Jul 23, 2004
*signs the papers slowly and laboriously*
The Captains office-sign up here!
Spacecadet Jack (Supreme Commander in Cheif) [Major] Posted Jul 29, 2004
*Fills in form 18-28/A-X*23-1B with his name (Jack, SpAcEcAdEt_1st_ClAsS), birthdate (22nd May 1969), id-papers (inc.) , shoe sizes over the years (long list), hair colour (black), haircut (ridiculously long), hair designer (a mad man named Anthony), name in 5 different ways (er... Jaque, Jack, Jak, Jacque, errr..... Jac), sneezes on the paper were it says: "please leave a DNA sample here", copies all of the answers in two different lanuages that he cant speak (Germnan, italian) then in 3 languages you can speak (spanish [badly] French [badly] Japanese [badly) puts his goals in life, fills in all his past boyfriends names (shorter list) , writes his education and capabilities, checks the box to be resurrected as a hologram when/if he dies and finally, signs it with signature and hands the papers in*
Phew, done? 
The Captains office-sign up here!
Ace Rimmer [pretending] Posted Jul 29, 2004
Yep!
*stamps the papers and puts them through the paper shredder*
There, you're all done, welcome aboard!
The Captains office-sign up here!
Spacecadet Jack (Supreme Commander in Cheif) [Major] Posted Jul 29, 2004
Thankyou sir *smart salute* what duties am I to be assigned?
The Captains office-sign up here!
Ace Rimmer [pretending] Posted Jul 29, 2004
ehhhhhummmmhmmmmm... nightwatchmanguard-guy something maybe?
The Captains office-sign up here!
Spacecadet Jack (Supreme Commander in Cheif) [Major] Posted Jul 29, 2004
*carefully*
May I suggest something sir? What about "Guy That Walks Around Looking Like Hes Doing Something But No-Ones Quite Sure What Becuase Hes Dead Before We Reach The Next Space Port?"
The Captains office-sign up here!
Ace Rimmer [pretending] Posted Jul 29, 2004
Uhmmm... yeah sure, whatever...
The Captains office-sign up here!
Spacecadet Jack (Supreme Commander in Cheif) [Major] Posted Jul 29, 2004
*salutes quickly* Very good decision sir *manic 
*
The Captains office-sign up here!
Ace Rimmer [pretending] Posted Jul 29, 2004
*smiles confidently*
It was, wasn't it.
The Captains office-sign up here!
Spacecadet Jack (Supreme Commander in Cheif) [Major] Posted Jul 29, 2004
I thought so sir, shall I report to the bridge later? You ssaid I should go get a physical first then do that, which was very smart of you, this still stand?
The Captains office-sign up here!
Ace Rimmer [pretending] Posted Jul 29, 2004
I did? I mean... Yes. Yes of course. I'm starting to like you spacecadet, you could go far.
The Captains office-sign up here!
Spacecadet Jack (Supreme Commander in Cheif) [Major] Posted Jul 29, 2004
Alright then *smart salute* I shall proceed as ordered
*leaves the office*
The Captains office-sign up here!
smeggyheads - RPG, yey! Posted Aug 2, 2004
*hands over his completed forms finally and salutes*
The Captains office-sign up here!
Ace Rimmer [pretending] Posted Aug 2, 2004
Excellent, welcome aboard!
*rimmer-salute*
The Captains office-sign up here!
smeggyheads - RPG, yey! Posted Aug 2, 2004
*happily does a rimmer-salute back and looks at Ace with adoration in his eyes*
You're an amazing commander, sir
The Captains office-sign up here!
Ace Rimmer [pretending] Posted Aug 2, 2004
I 'am' aren't I?
Goddangit I'm starting to like these new recruits. They know great leadership when they see it.
The Captains office-sign up here!
smeggyheads - RPG, yey! Posted Aug 4, 2004
*gazes at him with rapt attention*
Is there anything I can do for you, sir....?
Key: Complain about this post
The Captains office-sign up here!
- 681: Ace Rimmer [pretending] (Jul 22, 2004)
- 682: Mort - a middle aged Girl Interrupted (Jul 22, 2004)
- 683: [...] (Jul 22, 2004)
- 684: smeggyheads - RPG, yey! (Jul 23, 2004)
- 685: Spacecadet Jack (Supreme Commander in Cheif) [Major] (Jul 29, 2004)
- 686: Ace Rimmer [pretending] (Jul 29, 2004)
- 687: Spacecadet Jack (Supreme Commander in Cheif) [Major] (Jul 29, 2004)
- 688: Ace Rimmer [pretending] (Jul 29, 2004)
- 689: Spacecadet Jack (Supreme Commander in Cheif) [Major] (Jul 29, 2004)
- 690: Ace Rimmer [pretending] (Jul 29, 2004)
- 691: Spacecadet Jack (Supreme Commander in Cheif) [Major] (Jul 29, 2004)
- 692: Ace Rimmer [pretending] (Jul 29, 2004)
- 693: Spacecadet Jack (Supreme Commander in Cheif) [Major] (Jul 29, 2004)
- 694: Ace Rimmer [pretending] (Jul 29, 2004)
- 695: Spacecadet Jack (Supreme Commander in Cheif) [Major] (Jul 29, 2004)
- 696: smeggyheads - RPG, yey! (Aug 2, 2004)
- 697: Ace Rimmer [pretending] (Aug 2, 2004)
- 698: smeggyheads - RPG, yey! (Aug 2, 2004)
- 699: Ace Rimmer [pretending] (Aug 2, 2004)
- 700: smeggyheads - RPG, yey! (Aug 4, 2004)
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