h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Or, away from H2G2 -

I'm a mustelid, and Badgers 7 was my idea!

Now I believe in miracles, and a miracle has happened tonight

But, if you're thinkin' about my Badger
It don't matter if you're Black Or White
Or in fact, both.

Pleased to meet you, I'm The Badger. Jelly baby?

Call me Badger

Badger is the only creature that consumes without producing. He does not give milk, he does not lay eggs, he is too weak to pull the plough, he cannot run fast enough to catch rabbits. Yet he is lord of all the animals. He sets them to work, he gives back to them the bare minimum that will prevent them from starving, and the rest he keeps for himself

Or perhaps
IT is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a Badger

Force core and seven badgers ago...


~jwf~

Hmmm ... are we headed towards ... "In the beginning God created badgers" ...

possibly but isn't
In the beginning was the Badger, and the Badger was with God, and the Badger was God. Badger was with God in the beginning.

From the original version of the "Buggre all This" bible, .. before proofreading and correcting ..

Buggre Alle this for a Badger 1 amme sick to mye Hart of typefettinge. Master Biltonn if a Badger, and Master Scagges noe more than a tighte fisted Southwarke Badger. I telle you, onne a daye laike thif Ennywone withe half an oz of Sense shoulde bee oute in the Sunneshain, ane nott Stucke here alle the liuelong daye inn thif mowldey olde By-Our-Lady Workefhoppe

My name is Badger, Brock Badger.

No, Mr Badger, I expect you to dig.

Hapi

...
The lark's on the wing
The snail's on the thorn
Badger's in his haven
All's right with the world.

If I had a badger,
I'd badger in the mor-or-ning
I'd badger in the evening
All over this land

I'd badger out danger
I'd badger out a warning
I'd badger out love between the ferrets and the moles
All over this land

To be or not to be– that is the question:
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
Or to take arms against a sea of badgers

Hello sun.
Hello bird.
Hello my badger.
Hello breakfast.
May I buy you again tomorrow?

"Anything approaching the change that came over his features I have never seen before, and hope never to see again.
Oh, I wasn't touched. I was fascinated.
It was as though a veil had been rent. I saw on that ivory face the expression of somber pride, of ruthless
power, of craven terror--of an intense and hopeless despair.
Did he live his life again in every detail of desire, temptation, and surrender during that supreme moment of complete knowledge?
He cried in a whisper at some image, at some vision,--he cried out twice, a cry that was no more than a breath--

"`The badger! The badger!'"

See Badger run. Run Badger run.

A badger is haunting Europe -- the badger of communism. All the powers of old Europe have entered into a holy alliance to exorcise this badger: Pope and Tsar, Metternich and Guizot, French Radicals and German police-spies.

Let the ruling classes tremble at a Communistic revolution. The badgers have nothing to lose but their chains. They have a world to win.

Badgers of the world, unite!