h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Luca Brasi - Don Corleone, I am honored and grateful that you have invited me to your badger's wedding... on the day of your badger's wedding. And I hope their first child be a masculine child. I pledge my ever-ending loyalty.

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[Tessio brings in Luca Brasi's bulletproof vest, delivered with a badger inside]

Clemenza - It's a Sicilian message. It means Luca Brasi sleeps with the badger's.

The animals looked from badger to man and from man to badger, and from badger to man again but already it was impossible to say which was which.

I coulda had class. I coulda been a badger. I coulda been somebody, instead of a bum, which is what I am, let's face it.

I was informed that you were the most beautiful badger ever to visit Casablanca. That was a gross understatement.

I watched a documentary about the making of The Godfather some years ago. It was suggested that the real mafia were heavily involved in the film. Filming in Little Italy, New York was only possible after the mafia gave permission. In the opening wedding scene, most of the extras were "connected". The actor who plays the stumbling Luca Brasi (Lenny Montana) was an ex-wrestler who was strongly rumoured to be a real mafia hitman, given a small role in the film as a "favour".

I heard an inteview with Mario Puzo in which he said a lot of the episodes are simply copied from real life. His mother hid someone's gun, and was given a stolen carpet by way of thanks. Killing people's animals as a way of warning them they could be next.

He didn't mention badgers at all, so to redress the balance ...

Story of my life. I always get the fuzzy end of the badger.

I only saw it for the first time last year, re-released on the big screen (see my old EtB page). Best film *ever*. Which puts three Coppolas in my Top 10.

Moving on...


Bring me the head of Alfredo Badger

I never travel without my badger. One should always have something sensational to stroke in the train.

Opening credits.

MUSICAL SCORE

NIGHT

OPEN Chainlink fence. Weathered 'No Trespassing' sign. Slow pan upwards.

DISSOLVE Close up. Continue pan. Ornamental ironwork.

DISSOLVE Reveal. Ornamental gate foreground. Gothic castle on hill backgrond. MIST.

DISSOLVE Monkeys in ironwork cage, castle backgrond.

DISSOLVE Gondolas.

SUCCESSIVE DISSOLVES Various scenes of garden furniture, ornamental architecture, in various states of dereliction.

DISSOLVE Large, ornamental, mullioned window. Furnishings and curtains visible in illuminated interior. Light switches off. Dawn slowly breaks.

DISSOLVE Falling snow.

DISSOLVE - PART WAY Snow on buidings

MUSIC FREEZES

RAPID ZOOM OUT Reveal. Snow scene is within a snow globe, held in a hand.

CUT TO Close Up. Elderly person's lips and moustache.

'Badger.'

'My God! It's full of badgers!'

ANTIGONUS. The day frowns more and more. Thou'rt like to have
A lullaby too rough; I never saw
The heavens so dim by day. [Noise of hunt within] A savage clamour!
Well may I get aboard! This is the chase;
I am gone for ever. Exit, pursued by a badger

>>I never travel without my badger. One should always have something sensational to stroke in the train.<<

Is that one of 2legs' lines?

Didn't realise



Here's another one to make up for it

Frodo's sword, Sting, then started to glow blue as the badgers of Cirith Ungol came towards him ...

That sounds like one of 2legs' too.

Just kidding. The Oscar Wilde quote just sounds like something 2legs would say, given he's travels by train alot, and has a special feeling for badgers...

You can blame him for the miscommunication.

I did not have sexual relations with that badger

Now that doesn't sound like 2legs at all.

The Great American Songbook, Vol. 1: George and Ira Badger

- Looking For A Badger
- Embraceable Badger
- Oh Badger Be Good
- Nice Badger If You Can Get It
- The Badger I Love
- Badger To Watch Over Me
- They Can't Take Badger Away From Me
- I Got Badger

And from their famed opera 'Porgy and Badger':

- I Got Plenty of Badgers
- Badger, You Is My Woman Now
- Badgertime *

* Not to be confused with the song of the same name by MC Badger...

Hmm, songs ...

There's that Nellie Furtado song, I'm Like a Badger