h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I had too, *had too* goodle it!

http://www.well.com/~cynsa/cement.html

One word: D*ck-head!

*giggle*

it takes a special sort of person...

I've just recalled a TV documentary I saw a few years ago. I think it must've been similar to thew series that's on TV at present (is it called 'Tribe'?) where a woman is sent to live with a 'primitive' tribe for a month.

However, on the documentary of a few years back, I recall the lady just about to make her departure from the tribe with whom she had been living. Just before she boarded her light aircraft, she turned to the tribesman beside her, who was naked except for a cord around his waist, which was festooned with wooden carvings of slightly larger than average penises.

"Remind me", she said. "What's the special name you have for that belt around your waist?"

"Belt-o'-long-cock", he replied, at which point the 'lady' 'd, 'd and 'd.

Tonight I'm been taken out of town, to a place with a car park, surrounded by trees, bushes etc.

"To look at bats, moths, and other wildlife." - Aww, bless her!

Has anybody thought of doing such activity?

Those.... 'anal misadventures', really are a strong bit of evidence for de-evolution.... that lis tof 'items' 'retrieved' ... some people is just so...

I personally am a fan of the excuses...

'I'd been shopping and forgot my keys, so I tried to climb in an upstairs window and fell. Onto this bottle of ketchup...' (prepared with lube and a condom..) was one that I have heard (though I suspect as with most of them, there's an element of urban myth. But then when you hear the genuine excuses, you become less sure...)

Hoh yus

Really, though, it must be pretty difficult to loose some of those* items up there... I mean anal dildos/vibrators arn't always designed with safety first anyhow and wouldn't exactly be difficult to... loose... but its pretty easy really to ensure one doesn't... or so I've heard anyhow

Well, the story of the anal vibrator 'burrowing north like an electronic mole' conjures up the vision that the surgeon was somehow unable to prevent this event occurring. Maybe the design of it was such that he was unabble to grab hold f it without it switching itself on....

P.S. I also like the excuses. They're on a par with those insurance caims that, "I inadvertently turned into the wrong drive and therefore collided with a tree that I don't have and so shouldn't have been there...'

or, even better,

"I hit a lamp post that was concealed by the pedestrian standing in front of it..."

People's excuses for their own stupidity rule... I like them lots

Stupidity... Some time back the g/f and I were watching a spoof film, of the 'Hot Shots!' style. Table Tennis balls had been 'featured'.



And we find ourselves in a sports shop over this weekend just gone, there for 99p a set of table tennis balls. A few giggles, as the do you remember that film comes the topic. She says there is more chance of them being sucked in than shot out. Hmm, an engineering challenge.



So as we sit in the car, I say; "what if the balls are placed inside a condom, then there is something to pull on to recover miscreant balls.

After nearly choking, she says; "maybe, but there would have to use lube too."

Later that night, I remember a product, femidoms. But the whole cost of doing this put's me off, never mind the bloody stuid nature of it, or if it's not the best way to treat a woman!



Re: Robyns Ketchup bottle trick would you not think the people that are prepared to stuff objects into themselves take a moment before taking a step back if you will' stop and consider object recovery methods? Maybe stick to purpose build devices, with handles or limiters?

You would think so!!!

I have been told, though never personally witnessed, that my best friend is able to aim and fire reasonably accurately with ping-pong balls... It's all to do with which muscles one has developed and how one uses them by all accounts.

Plus, vaginal insertion is very much more limited than anal, the cervical opening is so tiny that things dont generally go missing.

*ducks*

It's a fishing expedition I don't fancy.

I believe the muscle control you refer to is called a "Singapore grip".
Only met one woman who could do that, so I married her

As regards anal insertions, I'll have to be a NIMBY on that one in every sense of the word!

You wouldn't believe what I've just spend the last hour and half of th working day reading on the net... errr... dunno maybe you would

errr, teh key with ... 'anal insertions'.... is lube.... and... nothing too* ambetitious a size/shape.... apparently....

Probably 'poppers' as well ...

or patience and graduating sizes

Concrete mix. Isn't that how friendships are cemented?

ERrrrr... yeh... apparently one can work their way up ... sizes of ... inserted 'devices' anal beads can be nice too... or at least so my friend told me Actually that reminds me, I need to... err... do some online shopping some time soon... err... yeh probably for grocerys or CDs or soemthing.. yeh... probalby something like that

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