h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I failed to catch your eye Ami

all that and a "luxury" trip to Cadburyworld!!!

Oops sorry! The bid goes back to the lady with the whip.

Oooh Amy you're going to do rather well out of this...

Something's just occurred to me... well two things actually... 1) How did I become your property in the first place? I have a very short memory so I'm not that surprised... but it's been a while since I sold myself. 2) Why do you want to sell me?

Perhaps this should be a regular event at the h2g2 meetups. 'Auction a Researcher'...

*pats pockets*

*turns out pockets*

Oh dear...

Auctioneers don't own the goods they sell.

I' m on 5% commission or a , whichever is the greater.

Ooh does that mean I get the trip to Cadburyworld and the chocolate and stuff? Or am I owned by a mystery seller?

*gives Solnushka a * Never mind dear, we'll be selling Bill Clinton next, maybe you can afford him.

*looks a bit vauge*

Doesn't Bill have to pay me?

*slips some of Solnushka some readies from the Bank of Moxon*

.oO This seems to be turning into a completely different kind of commercial activity. And what am I supposed to do with lots that keep on hugging the punters? That whip lady seems very keen, we just need someone to bid against her. Time for another "telephone" bid, perhaps? Oo.

Upping the ante, eh? Okay, I add this batch of home-baked brownies and a fairly new pencil.

For sale, two ex boyfriends, one to suit the smaller model of lady, bless he's only 5'6",the other, tall and lean, young and a sweetheart... Well, I'm happy now, so I thought I'd recycle this lot!!

I think we have to know why they're "ex" boyfriends first, though...

All the females I know like nice shiny yellow feathers, bright eyes and a clean beak. Oh, and a clear musical whistle, of course - but that almost goes without saying.

Ok, Mr 21, is too quiet and nice for a woman like me, would never go clubbing and disliked loud rock bars. So would suit someone of a quieter disposition, and the other is an ex cos I upgraded him for a taller model!! And he never really loved me... unlike Mr Current, who is very lovely!! (and the reason why I'm not even bothering to bid!)

I bid one slightly chewed stick of celery

Lot One: Peregrin plus dressing gown, bicycle and various domestic gadgets. Current bid listed in the next - when I've added it up.

Lot Two: HV's ex boyfriends. Job lot.

Happy Dude has bid several items of food including chocolate in various guises, assorted currency amounting to not very much, one washer, one bicycle pump, three boxes of cookies of a North American disposition, some home-baked cookies, a pencil and a limp salad vegetable.

*adds a years supply of Cadbury's Creme Eggs to the above*

I have

LOL Happy! Perhaps you better specify which Lot you are bidding for