h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

cheepest...

at push I can go to two sticks of celery

*Triumphant laugh:*
Ha-hah! You can't keep a thing like this from me - especially if it's talked about at the Atelier!

I don't know what I'd use the Prez for, because I could of course take h2g2 over at any time (but won't, 'cos I'm a nice sort of chap), but I bid:
- 2001 tubs of Osian Sub-Ice Cream
- A warehouse full of Canfrieda Sugar-Crisps
- Near-endless supplies of alcoholic Canfrieda Wine and San Betian Seawater
- A free tour around the Governmental House of G-Planet, where I work and live (when not on h2g2)

Beat that!

I think its fairly safe to say ignore everything written in this thread. What women *say* they want, and what women *actually* want are two completely different species.

This is the only way I can explain the number of women who come crying to me, telling me how bad their boyfriends are, and how they wished they could find someone like me, when I'm still single.

Women say they want a nice guy, but they dont really mean it. Deep down in the subconsious they actually like men who cheat on them, mess them around, and generally dont treat them right at all. Hence all the women who stay with guys who beat them up and act the exact opposite of whats claimed to be wanted here.

According to this thread I should have women flocking around me, but instead all I get is "love you like a brother". I'm the "nice guy" and therefore I don't have a girlfriend. QED.

But hey, I'm just bitter and twisted.

Hooloovoo

Er, Prof. I think perhaps you might wish to reconsider, as the auction is for Peregrin as a partner, if you know what I mean

Eek, simulpost. Hey Hooloovoo, I know what you mean.
Story of my life. But trust me, it gets better.

*puts hand down quickly, and hides the half a bottle of flat San Miguel he was going to bid*

oops, me too.

Do you mean your life, your life story or simulposting gets better, B-17?

Gah! /I'm/ not the one who wants Peregrin! I've just heard from the Station's Public Noticeboard that there are several residents here who would like a perfectly tamed bird for company.

Um, Prof. - I think that's "company" in the biblical sense ...

No, wait, that's not how it goes ...

Never mind ...

All of the above, Nexus Seven

Anyone who had actually bothered to read the catalogue would know that this is the human version of Peregrin w'e're actioning here. Six foot tall, blond hair, nearly 21 years old etc.

I disallow Professor C's bid. (My auction, my rules). I'll just try to figure out what the current state of the bidding is.

Gah!
The residents in question will be most displeased!

*Breaks comms link...*

OK, it's currently NexusSeven's bid of several items of food including chocolate in various guises, assorted currency amounting to not very much, one washer, one bicycle pump, three boxes of cookies of a North American disposition, some home-baked cookies, a pencil, two pieces of limp salad vegetable (although HappyDudes reference to "cheepest" may indicate a bid for Shorn the Canary), a year's supply of a famous brand of Creme Egg, and a bottle of booze.

If it's a bird you're after, try Shorn the Canary. He's quite cute when he lets his feathers grow.

Actually, that was home-baked brownies ... but I'll chip in with some home-baked gingerbread cookies as well, and a veggie platter with Knorr's veggie dip (yum!).

The bid is now with Shea.

It comprises several items of food including chocolate in various guises, assorted currency amounting to not very much, one washer, one bicycle pump, three boxes of cookies of a North American disposition, some home-baked cookies and brownies, a pencil, two pieces of limp salad vegetable (although HappyDudes reference to "cheepest" may indicate a bid for Shorn the Canary) which could be added to a veggie platter with Knorr's veggie dip, a year's supply of a famous brand of Creme Eggs, and half a bottle of booze

I would like to say to all the NICE MEN out there, that don't worry, when shes finished playing the field, you do get noticed. Trust me. My man is a very nice man, who put up with hearing about all my sexploits, until one night he got me alone and kissed me....
And I melted!! He's still far too nice for a bitch like me, and I all I can hope is that I don't crush him too much when I break his heart, but its kinda cosy.... I like it a lot actually.

I'll take your word for it, that you do exist. I've met a few men who thought they were nice men. Turned out they weren't so nice. Just a little boring.

Done boring, maybe thats why we avoid men with the tag nice!!

>I would like to say to all the NICE MEN out there, that don't worry,
>when shes finished playing the field, you do get noticed

Oh great so I've got a life of no girlfriends, then when I'm thirty I'm gonna get some bitch whos decided shes gonna settle down with the next bloke she meets.

Woohoo to that!.

Hooloovoo