h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

and were they impressed?

*suddenly remembers an embarassing moment*

Did I mention the time when I exclaimed rather loudly 'why is there is abook here about plant psychology?' only to realise a few seconds later than it was actually *physiology* ?



Not very impressive on the embarassment scale, I know...

David

=BOOKMARK=

"plant psychology" reminds of lady in my town who can talk to trees and one summer she brought lawsuit against the local goverment, because a festival in a local park was hurting trees.

This morning I went to a vending machine in a not-particularly-awake state and entered the price instead of the item number of the delicious caffeine-containing item I wanted. I ended up with a very unpleasant bag of Spicy Tomato crisps instead. Of course, I had to pretend that was what I intended to do (there was someone waiting behind me), get some more money out and try again...

One of my colleagues got some free crisps out of it, anyway.

David

Ermmm, well, I'm not sure its the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to me, but yesterday I guested on a friend's show on 87.9 Blink FM, a youth radio project that currently covers an estimated 300km and has a few thousand listeners. I was, ermmm, forced to freestyle rap .

I think I was listening

I feel a bit confessional. When I was sixteen I went to a restaurant with a bunch of friends, including the dishiest human in creation (in front of whom I was a paralysed dribbling mute and purple wreck). there was a salad bar. From reasons I am about to unfold, i will never ever eat from a communal salad bar again. Anyway, I went up to get some salad at the same time as my crush, and he was standing the opposite side of the counter, when I suddenly sneezed loudly, violently, and alas with body, onto the spponful of pasta salad he was just lifting from the bowl. He looked at the spoon, looked at me, winked, and dropped it on the floor, making it look like an accident and dispersing the, ahem, evidence. I think his gentlemanly behaviour embarrassed me nearly as much as if he had yelled 'Yuk! Look what you've done!' at the top of his voice.

Not that I ever got to kiss him.

ouch. a couple of friends of mine did eminem's lose yourself in a karaoke bar, and the prompt was a bit off. painful to watch, although listening to another (male) classmate sing carol king's natural woman was much much worse.

i suppose i should add something embarrassing that i did? a couple weeks ago i steppped off the curb a teeny bit while getting into the car and completely fell over. doesnt' sound so bad, but there were people around, and just randomly falling over is a llittle sillly. i at least had the excuse that, what with time differences and a ten hour flight, it was four in the after noon and i had been awake since eleven the night before local time.

This morning I saw the biggest spider EVER scuttling across the office floor. I screamed so loud that people from the other offices (including panda cat) came running to see what was wrong. They found me standing on a chair in a daft panic. Oh dear!

I've fallen over in front of many people too chickadee, however, my only excuse was that I'm a complete klutz. It was when I was a teenager & I was taking rowing lessons one summer & we were learning how to row in one of those long skinny boats that everyone has to get into. So, one class towards the end of the course, we all go down to the dock & start getting into the boat (which was in the water & beside the dock) like we'd been taught. I think I was near the end of the boat. I put my right foot in, & all of a sudden, the left side of my body had fallen in the river . It was a very odd, confusing situation cause I wasn't sure at the time how half of me had fallen into the river & the other half still seemed to be in the boat . Now I've figured that since I was near the end, the boat must have floated away from the dock while I was getting in. So I had to go home soaking wet, & was so embarrased by the whole incident that, being a silly teenager, I never went back.

i AM a silly teenager, but i just found it amusing. scraped my knee, too.

That reminds me of something quite silly too.
I was forced to sail on this tiny tub called an Optimist when I was, I think, 11. Me and my friend were sailing the darn thing and across from us sat a huge man, who was almost sinking the tiny boat.
The amount of water we had to take out of there, while sailing, and on shore, was ridiculous.
Has anyone seen Shallow Hal? Just that.

Hmmm... Well I've just realised that although I do plenty of things people would think embarrasing, it happens to me so often (or at least used to) that I no longer get embarrased by them... However my GF more than makes up on my behalf...

Anyway the story about sailing tubs reminds me of a PGL Holiday I went on when I was 11... We'd all been sailing on a fairly small lake for a while, and it was dreary and NO FUN whatsoever, and we were all soaked through... When someone's boat (actually not mine) slipped its mooring (or whatever they do) and floated out into the middle of the lake... Instead of waiting around for a teacher or anything I just dived in and flailed around (I was wearing a lifevest) 'til I got near to the boat, then I swum back to the edge of the lake, towing it, which was fine, until I got near the edge and realised I could stand up!! And could probly have done so all the way out......

Which has reminded me of another story!
On the same "holiday" we went Kayaking - my first time...

I managed to be the first to capsize (into some roots near the side of the lake)... and the last- as we were all getting out...

Which reminds me of another time I was kayaking (I used to do it for fun...) while on the River Wey(?) at Guildford... There was this barge steaming along so I moved over to the side... Unfortunately I went straight into some nettles that were overgrowing the bank, I jerked away, and managed to capsize the boat... For a few minutes (it felt like) I couldn't right myself (I was too close to the bank) or get out of the bloody thing!!! (again too close to the bank - weeds and crap...)..

Finally I extricated myself and was dragged up onto the deck of the barge where a large was pressed into my hand... So not all bad then... Mind you I was too scared to be embarrassed by that at the time...

How can you find water sports FUN?
And why is it that you always go into those bloody bushes when you're frozen cold of the water and can't escape?

?

I often sing to myself as I'm walking along. Once, when I had been listening to Tom Lehrer, I was singing 'Poisoning Pigeons in the Park' as I came up to a short tunnel under the railway line. The next line I sung echoed nicely down to the person at the other end of the tunnel, who looked rather disturbed to hear the words:

We'll murder them all amidst laughter and merriment!

Oops.

Me:

Them:

David

I once worked in a call centre. I'd answered the phone 'Good Morning' even though it was the afternoon, and started laughing to myself, trying not to laugh out loud on the phone.

The caller asked for a member of staff who had recently left, and as I tried my best not to burst out laughing I said, very seriously and professionally...

"I'm terribly sorry, but she's no longer with us".

That was the final straw...