h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

What happened to Ford Prefect during his 15 years on Earth before the Vogons destroyed it?
When did he first meet Arthur dent?
Did he ever appear in a production of Godspell?
These and may other questions remain unanswered...until now
As a community exercise I propose we right the Prequel...One line at a time
This could take his adventure in many directions, but I think we should drawn along a time line till that particular Thursday when he walks up Arthur Dents drive to and talks to Prosser.
We may consider sub plots, such as the Islington party Arthur went to and maybe a bit background regarding Trillian.
To start we must consider he is no Ford as yet but must establish his Earth bound identity.
I will start with a simple lead in.


The journey to Earth had been difficult with no direct hyperspace route available in this quadrant.

Owing to his pushing the wrong button, the landing hadn't been all that good, either.

He had decide only to stay on this crummy planet for a couple of days just to update The Guide,

and maybe pick up a girl or two to make it worth his while.

But having not yet investigated the sex types on Earth, he still is not sure which are the girls.

However, he is pretty sure he can have lots of fun finding out!

He suddenly realizes he has not got an identity for himself, so goes into the nearest pub for inspiration.

At least, he tries, but the moment he enters what he thinks is a pub, he is hit by a screaming creature.

"arrrgggghhhhh eeeeeeeeeeeeiiiiiiiiighhhhhhh whoooooooooiiiiiiiie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Ford wonders what all those neat little cubicles are for.

The icon of the female earth life form on the door that in went through, bothered him

He decided that if he wished to remain inconspicuos, it might be better not to go in untill he found out what it was for.

Being a hitchhiker, he decided to thumb a lift from a passing car, just then a classic Ford Prefect pulled up,

The door opened, and a scantily clad member of the species said: "hop in, stud!"

as he got in he said"Well thank you, but actually my name is not Stud", "So who are you then"she asked

(Ralph I think we need some input from others with this thread, do you have any community friends who may be worthy of this great work of fiction)

"I am err" he said and then looked at the car "Ford" he said "Ford Prefect"

she looked at him pityingly before asking "well Ford where are you headed to?"

"I don't know" said Ford, then he looked at a sign "Islington" he said

(thinks of a pun along the lines of'"i can take you all the way"', etc, etc, is't proud of it, but does not know if this is acceptable in polite e-society)