h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

They're stored in the museum basements along with all the kinky sex stuff.

How about Debussy's La Mer? I've never been much for impressionist music, but in here, it has a fighting chance...

"Water water everywhere, and not a drop to drink".
"Did you know urine is sterile, you can drink it".
and other famous toilet quotes

Um BB... 'tis actually:
Nor any drop to drink!
But hey... lets not split hairs here!
To quote from a schoolboy howler:
'Owing to slackness of demand,
There was a great slut in the market!'
shazzPRME

My theory is Coleridge meant to write "not a drop" but was far too stoned to realise what he was writing

HAHAHAHA! You are probably correct!
According to a shoolboy:
There are 3 kinds of Downs:
North, South and Eider
... and the Matterhorn was a horn
blown by the ancients when anything
was the matter!
shazzPRME

Sorry to muck up the thread but i m replying to technoyokel.

Sultans of Ping did a song about Armitage Shanks. Masters of Industry, makers of Toilets.

Ironically, it was crap!

*Ook comes in, blinking in the dimm light, pushing the cleaning bot ahead of him*
Ook?
*the bot sizes up the job and sets to work immediately*
*Ook puts the box of bog roll down on the counter and looks around in amazement*
*the bot mops the floor then starts doing stalls*
*Ook looks over bot's shoulder and becomes even more amazed*

*saunters in, avoiding, cleaning bot. plops down in corner, tucking sign back into coat.Brings out sax*
it's request time, everyBODY!!! the sax man has ARRIVED!!

*Ook pushes flush lever tentatively*
FLUSH-SH-SH-SH!
Ook: Ook!!
*pushes lever again*

Hey! The sax man is back!
Great!... do you know any Steely Dan?
How about Deacon Blues?
shazzPRME

Or maybe "Come Rain Or Come Shine"?

Hello Superdreamer
I knew somebody who was a big fan of Armitage shanks- he reckoned their toilets were far superior to any others! Maybe he wrote the song (The AS factory is in Rugely)

*starts in on a tentative sax version of "Cold as Ice", decides it doesn't suit him, and plays Kenny G hits(again)*

man, this pop stand's too slow for me. i'm ,like, outta here.
*replaces sign and leaves*

*cleaning bot now moves forward and cleans rest of room, then dispenses bog rolls*
*after final swivel to check work, cleaning bot goes back upstairs*

Good! It's gone!
*starts searching for suitable writing implement, realises that she hasn't got one, so makes a quick exit mumbling something about why isn't there a stationary store around here*
shazzPRME

*Glances through the door, seeing no-one around, goes to wall beside urinals, puls out tipp-ex, stretches as tall as I can and draws a line.*

How high can you go?

*Tip toes quietly out*

*shazz enters with step-ladders, positions them alongside FC's writing, draws a line much higher and writes:
'Higher then you!'
takes down ladders and leaves sniggering*
shazzPRME

*enters, studies lines with interest, leaves and returns shortly after carrying a pair of stilts,a brush and a bucket of paint. Paints a yellow line on the ceiling and writes "see if you can match this..."

Walks out again*

*Enters, sees line on the ceiling, exits, gets a ladder, climbs on top of the building, and draws a line at the very top of the roof.*
Hah!