h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*walks around the 'newbe'...looks up & down...'sposses it's alright...keeps her hand on her saber...just in case...after all... there ARE s in these here waters!*
Welcome, mind 'yer manors & yer welcome to visit the party in my cabin...#1001.

* enters the cabin with a large tray of breakfast goodies *

Hi there everybody, I have not seen some of you for a while so thought that you must all be working really hard and might need some breakfast.

Hi you must be Pandora, great to meet you.

* goes over to Munch * Hello there, I dont think we have met?

* goes over to Plato * Hi Plato * passes him an

I am Light by the way, I run the Lighthouse bar in Cabin 13, please feel free to pop in whenever you like. If I am not there just help youself

Thanks, Light

Pandora - permission to kiss the captain is granted - as always

Munch - welcome. I think we have a couple of Starfighters in hold 46B in the YTK-quadrant. I got them cheap from the german airforce back in the late 1960's - after they had lost a lot of them in accidents...

Avast, Skipper!

Curse your black heart and all that tosh! My name's BigEric and I'd like to volunteer to be ship's Purser. I've had years of dealing with really scurvey mutinous dogs in British industry, so I could be quite useful in recruiting (for which I wave a cutlass about), discipline (for which I use a cutlass - but fairly), and hiring and firing (for which I use a gun - no appeals necessary).

I may just claim myself a cabin so that I can conduct private staff counselling sessions (on which you will of course be fully briefed), but first I'll try and find the Wardroom, and settle down with a pint of grog and see if I can ingratiate myself with your other officers.

Avast and belay there, you lily-livered scum. (Oooh, I have so missed my motivational role as a manager!) Shiver my timbers.

How could I ever refuse an offer like that? Welcome!

Hi Big Eric

* wonders why they call him Big Eric *

Good to meet you. I'm Light and I run the Lighthouse Bar in Cabin 13. I think you will find all the grog you desire there, or if not I am sure I can arrange to get some on board If ever I am not there when you want a drink its self service so make yourself at home.

::Speechless so he steals a kiss from Pandora instead::

Arrr...

Mr. First Mate Plato- thanks! I'm fond of the X-wing AND the TIE models (especially Defender and Advanced!!) ... but I'm also good with the Athena, Hercules and Apollo... Not to mention the Pyro-GX (well, the older models, anyway.)

Pandora- if that message was for me- thanks!

Light- No, we haven't- I'm new. I'm hunting my old foe Captain Blackmullet, and this seems like the finest ship to join until our paths cross again! Ooo, are those croissants? Do you mind? Blast! Sorry, I'll clean that up in a minute. Sounds like you're from the UK too.... arrr! (piratical expression of approval)

Cap'n- Arr, thanking ye. I'll go find a cabin on the gun deck, unpack me stuff, then maybe I'll go have a look at your facilities and fixtures.....

Avast, I think I'll go find a cabin. Thank you all for your distictly un-dastardly welcome...

Hello Light, Big E. & the rest...good eats!

*s for all the men* For those not knowing of me
I an a 'Born Again Tart' *touches her saber* Want to make something of that?

Incase of battle I have in my cabin tracers & armor piercing shells for my rifle. I'm ready for a fight. Verbal or otherwise. That's what too much grog does to me..and if you don't like it you may BITE ME! So much for the likes of all ye' scervy s!!!! *munches an orange*

Don't worry about ME Pandora- many, nay, MOST of my best friends are uptown tarts. In fact... I think I may be one too.

Oops I still haven't unpacked!

Munch

*give Munch an extra trunk to unpack things into* We tarts oughta' stick together.

Captain sir, I have a proposition... I don't think we've set foot in Christmas Island yet, although we seem to be right in the middle of it...... anyway, I think that if you created a new guide entry about this place and featured the capitol, places to visit etc. We could start threads on that page about our explorations there blah blah blah...We could even do the same for that adventure for Mr. Pod I'm hearing so much about... Well? What do you think cap'n Sir?

Oooo goodie-goodie!!! *begins to jump up and down*
Adventure!!! *removes the saber from it's half sheath & swings it around over head for practice...cuts the rope to the crows nest stranding The Above Average Joe* Oppsie...


*posts a memo on the memo board: To the ships carpenter:::
needed: one 96' ladder...The Average Joe is stuck in the crow's nest. Am sending one named Buddy to fetch food for
T.A.A. Joe...will pay by the rung*~Pandora

*STILL missing, one gentalman's poet style shirt. Last seen insideout & back to front: Reward given at time of retrieval*
~Pandora~

DON'T WORK LUV WILL 'AVE YA' DOWN IN NOT TIME!

Er, well, first mate - it's not that I am *opposed* to your idea. I just don't have the time to do a proper job about it for the time being. Mind if we just make another thread from here? Go ahead if you want to

Well, the thing about more threads is that they'd get all jumbled...
But maybe some time you could start a guide entry called: "The Further adventures of Captain Pierce and his Crew: Christmas Island"
and not write anything else? On your own time of course, good Captain...

Hmmm.... Too bad you aren't stranded up here with me, Pandora...
::thinks about using his knife to do the "sliding-down-the-sail-and-consequently-ripping-it-in-half-pirate-trick," but decides to wait for the ladder::

Ahoy everybody!

I have just been informed that today is new years, if you are a jew. Personally I am not ( and I can prove that ) but hey, did I ever say no to a new years party?

The jews are entering the year 5762 by the way. So if you are still having year 2000-problems with you computers - maybe you should convert?

First mate - I'll thing about it

Thank you captain! (no hurry)

The waves crashed high on the rocky coast of Christmas
Island as the ship Blood of the Zaphodistas set sail
toward it. A horrendous storm offshore was driving the sea mighty
hard, yes sir, with some waves exceeding 100 metres....oops,
make that 100 centimetres (I never could do metrics ). Maybe
that storm isn't so powerful after all.

(Ooh, looky, a rainbow! Do pirates say "Ooh, looky"? Perhaps not.
Well, never mind )

The granite rocks at the shore's edge were interspersed with basalt,
shale, and gneiss, making the whole scene as gneiss as anyone
could have wished (ahem!).

Contrary to the allegations of a certain poet in Cabin 99, there were
no sea monsters lurking offshore to seize and devour the ship,
nor was there a huge dog to block the pirates' way. Indeed, the
only thing that greeted them was an amply proportioned
McDonald's, waiting to thicken their waistlines and drive up
their cholesterol......

(To be continued)

I've just nipped out from my temporary bar tending postion to enquire about the mission we all got tooled up for, ages ago!

Is it still on or are we just giving ourselves up to rolling around the ocean waves in the lap of luxury?

Not that I object to the lap of luxury, or rolling come to that, but there hasn't been much action and the canon are getting dusty!