h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Welcome! So you want to be a member of the crew? Okay, well here is the deal: Everything we get our hands on is divided in three parts: One for the crew, one for the captain and one for the ship. The latter is used to provide you with all you need: Food, drink, a place to sleep, weapons, clothes, entertainment - you name it!

What kind of job were you looking for? Carpenter? Cook? Marauder?



PS: If you only want to be a passenger that's fine with me also. Just book a cabin by pressing the "discuss this entry"-button and name it cabin #(number of your choice)

Just remember: 1. No spitting outside the spittletrays. And 2. should you happen to kill someone you'll have to clean up the mess yourself

Er, yes ... hello ...

*Extends hand rather nervously, then hesitates at the thought of shaking a hook ...*
Well, I'm not much good with a sword, and that sort of thing .. but I'm a bit of a whizz at maths, so I could work out how to set the guns ... range them on distant targets ... that sort of thing ... Would that qualify? ... and I could navigate a bit, and I've got a silly three-cornered hat if that helps ....

Oh - and I brought my ship's piano along ... *indicates a small Broadwood upright with 3 octave keyboard standing on the quayside* . I could play jolly music while the pirates turn the capstan ....

*Brushes with gloved finger at a spot of tar which has adhered to his white trousers. Waits for the Captain's reply ...*

Wha'? Oh, right, yes. Well, I could do with a little help here and there. Math, you say? And navigation? And music?

Well, allright then. Come aboard and make yourself usefu... I mean, at home!

Jolly good! ...and if you'd just get your chaps to bring the piano on board - careful with it mind! - and pop it down in my cabin ...er ..wherever that is. I'll just see if I can find the wardroom and a nice little pink gin to set me up for the day ...

Pink gin?

Allright, okay, suit yourself. *mutters to himself: I think that calls for a double rum for myself*. You'll find any kind of drink in The Main Messroom.

Seeing as you are only the second aboard (Amy the painter was the first) you shouldn't have problems finding a suitable cabin. You can create your own, you know? (see posting 1)



Oh, and I'll have that instrument brought to your cabin as soon as you've made your mind up

*grins from her hammock*

Hi, everyone...

I would like to join your crew.

Being an interstellar hitchhiker extraordinare, I have seen all types of ships, space and sea, and have become quite good at repairing them if need be.

I'm also an expert cannoneer.

Hopefully this will be enough to be accepted...

Er,

Right then.

Ahoy ! 8-D

Well, let's see...

I don't (and can't) cook, I don't wash things and I'm rather accident prone.

Do you have a vacancy for a ship's layabout?

*Slips the a small brown envelope containing a wad of dosh as a bribe*

Hej, monsieur!
Do you have any need for a gardener? I am especially good at blue agaves . On lucky days I'm also good at making coffee.

Hatifnat the Gardener

Welcome, YP! I can *always* use a good cannoneer

Accident prone, Gwennie? Well, maybe you can be our klabauterman? You know, a kind of seafaring poltergeist?

Hati! A gardener? What an excellent idea. Can you grow us agaves enough to make us some tequila? Maybe you should also grow a couple of lemon trees? (there should be salt enough in the sea around us)

Is it ok for you, monsieur, if I bring the plants on board in few days? Is there a place für them?

Hi! May I come aboard? I'd like to apply for a crew position. I'm a hard worker and am reliable. Also, I have no fear of heights, so going up into the rigging won't bother me. I have some sailing experience too.

*Tosses dufflebag of belongings onto the deck, and wipes her hands on her jeans in order to rummage through her stuff for her letters of recommendation and her resume. She is wearing a tee shirt that says:
'Destined For Greatness, but pacing myself' on it. A towel pokes out of the dufflebag, and a bottle clinks inside.*

Here are my papers, Captain sir.

I'd like to sign up as ships ..I'm a very good rat catcher and not above biting anti-pirate people on the bum.
I drink rum and cider and earn my keep.
With my sharp claws I can climb up to the lookout and catch a few seagulls for tea.(but not when I've been drinking rum and cider) AND i'm a natural fighter with a killer instinct.....just ask that thrush my owner took off me this morning..........

I'd like to sign up as some sort of security officer. Or prison guard, or maybe even torturer. To get infomation out of reluctant prisoners of course, not for any sort of personal pleasure or anything.

Can I be the watcher?

Hati, the greenhouse is ready for you: http://www.bbc.co.uk/h2g2/guide/F70774?thread=131624&post=1191216#p1191216 mari-rae: You are most welcome. Since you are not afraid of heights maybe you could start by going here: http://www.bbc.co.uk/h2g2/guide/F70774?thread=130413&skip=0&show=20 Tabitca: A rat.chasing is most welcome! Mina: Security officer and such? Be my guest (but I'm not sure I want to see - or hear - what you will be doing here: http://www.bbc.co.uk/h2g2/guide/F70774?thread=130410&skip=0&show=20 Trin: If *you* like to watch it, feel free!

Hullo, Captain !

I'd like to sign up to be the figurehead. Its the perfect life: a lovely view, lots of fresh sea air, the wind in your hair, and *no* responsibilities. (Other than protecting the boat from running into things, or course.)

Yes, I believe that the life of the figurehead is the perfect life for me.

G7

Greetings ! It's a fine ship you have here!

I offer my special talent of instilling fear into others with my very short temper. I'm also pretty handy with a neon sword!

::: brandishes sword, and flicks the switch so it glows in an extremely cool way :::

Welcome! Female s are *most* welcome!

Gw7en, with a figurehead like you what could possibly go wrong? Feel free to assume the position right away!

Shea, a swordslady? Why, I would be honoured!

Grand! Thank you, !

*dashes off to her assigned place*

G7