h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Ooh great, I will sort out a cabin and get my sewing machine oiled.

I will make sure the Captain's trousers will fit like no other, with Floh's assistance of course.

I won't interfere with the navigation, unless we go up the Bristol Channel and then I may be need to restrained.

Ahoy new neighbour

Hi Floh!

Once I've finished this quilt, I'll do one for you

Disorientation again...
I wanted to post to your cabin-conversation.
I'll return to the crow's nest, at least I know how to get there

Don't worry about the disorientation, Floh. After all this is a tall ship - especially for one of your stature

5' 8'', captain, sir!

That makes you the tallest Floh in history - are you aware of that?

ooh! Just a thought, but the pirate ship is always welcome at the h2g2 spacefarers' cantina at http://www.bbc.co.uk/h2g2/guide/A368093. "...The Cantina is where the disreputable people can be found. Not the scientists, not the explorers, but the bounty hunters, murderers, outlaws and gunrunners. If you need someone eliminated by a skilled assassin, or an illegal shipment of arimeshte slipped passed a Federation blockade by an experienced smuggler, this is the place to find the man you need...."

We'd also be very happy indeed to sell you weapons. Krans and I are noted galaxy-wide for our weapons design, and we even helped BigC with some of the systems in his space station before he became jealous of our scientific prowess and threw us out (So we kidnapped his spacestation with our GSVs*). We got rid of the GSVs: They're a little cumbersome, but we still have a few ROUs**. (Actually, rather a lot) and some MSVs which we're also prepared to sell, should they be wanted in what we consider a good home.

We did have loads of forums for all the different areas of the cantina and where people joined and stuff, but the changeover to the BBC seems to have killed them all off. Anyway. Yes.

Also, I'd love to be a member. I haven't had much fun recently: It's been too quiet... and the ship seems an interesting place to work.

Any place for a scientist/space commando/general ruffian who can argue the hindlegs off a donkey?

- Njan.



*GSV: General Systems Vehicle: Originating from a universe parallel to this one (Designated IMB269-a) and with a mind of AI-index 26 or above, GSVs are around 26 kilometres in length with two general bays of 10km by 5. They have a population (living on the surface, protected by multilayer forcefields) of around 2 billion people)

**ROU: Rapid Offensive Unit: Originating in the Idirian wars, these small (between 5 and 200m long) units are devastatingly powerful. Even the demilitarised VFPs (Very Fast Picket) can take apart small star systems in the blink of an eye)

**MSV: Medium Systems Vehicle. The smaller cousins of the GSVs for which the culture is famous

~strides in wearing female gear and swishes sword about~

~accidentally jabs Njan in the buttock~

Oh dear.
Sorry about that.
Where is Pierce?
I wish to join his crew.
I insist on pillaging!

*turns round and frowns at seven through his sunglasses from his great height*... oh, it's you. ... hello there.

Hello.
Where is the Captain?

~pats the captain on his back~

Excuse me sir...I was wondering if you had already thought about the onboard entertainment...I have some experience in organizing activities where people can relax, or party like there's no tomorrow.
No worries about little things like the music, the drinks and stuff like that...I have been working in a castle () that was completely devoted to things like that...
Apart from that, I'm well trained in the use of knives, so I can join in on th eregular pirating as well (starts playing with his bowie knife)

Assuming I'm allowed onboard, I could always give you a hand - I'm a musician myself.

If the captain sees something in my offer, I absolutely accept your offer . It's a lot of work, so help is always welcome

well ahoy again floh!
i'm back on ship and ready for more pillaging and alternative entertainment ! i must say our captain looks particularly fine in his new trousers though they may need to be taken out just a little or i dont think we shall be seeing any Pierce the juniors! perhaps i could give the captain a hand in that....
not to infringe on your territory floh but after last night i think pierces appetite may have increased somewhat (and i dont mean for salads even though they are particularly delicious )
menage a trois perhaps?
DM

As the ship's Sewing Mistress, I have to say that the Captain's trousers are the snug fit he desired.

In due deference to Floh's position she acted as chaperone when it came to the inside leg. I have to say that if she hadn't been there, then I may be walking in fear of my life!

* wanders on board *

*waits for someone to notice her *

*decides to stop hiding her light *

Err excuse me - I am looking for the Captain.

Is there going to be lots of partying sorry pirating going on here? I was wondering if you needed a barmaid? I pull a great and mix a mean (strong)

I would even take cabin 13 if you like

*aside to the girls*
I hear there are some hunky guys here

Pleasure, Caerwynn

Ménage à trois? Hmm, we should ask him before we make any further decisions...

Ahoy, all you good people!

Sorry to have kept you waiting but something just came up - and now we may even have to man the battle stations shortly

Right. To business. Njan, thanks for the invitation. For the time being we have all we need here, but I will go see your place with a couple of volunteers as soon as I can spare the time. You are welcome to take up any position you like and go find yourself a suitable cabin! And go talk to Kes and/or Wowbagger about music!

7of9! Good to see you. Please be a little more careful with that sword of yours, though . Pillage we will! Would you like to bunk with the lads on the orlop decks or would you like a cabin for yourself?

Kheldar, we can use any entertainment we need And a handy knifesman is always welcome! A bowie knife, eh? Did you bring any Bowie rec's too from that Kastle of yours?

As much as I understand your concern, DM, I have to admit that Caerwynn is absolutely right. These trousers fit perfect - and thank heavens for lycra...

Lighthouse Girl, you are very welcome - but watch where you go at night. Wouldn't want to distress the helmsman Feel free to take cabin 13 - and I'll be around later for one of your

DM? You ask him, okay?