h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Welcome to the H2G2 Waterworks Sewer tour - where you get a chance to look around all the dirt and grime, and see if you
can find the odd unexplained monster or two...
We're currently starting a circus up, so please join in, help find some monsters and train them, and all should go well.

<BB<

I don't have any monsters left to train, they're all sawed up.

No! How could you do that???
Oh well, I'm sure we can find some more.... we'll just have to go to...
THE DEEP SEWER!!!!

*grins and groans*

¦M¦

I'd be careful if I were you, Ming - there are some dangerous monsters in this sewer!

I think I should just pretend to saw the monsters up, a monsterless sewer is not a sewer, is it?

*being very careful*

Yes, Hannah, just pretend to saw them - that might work best.
Ming, what kind of monsters are your favourites, and which are you most scared of? Beleive me, there are many dangerous creatures you do not want to meet!

Meeting them is nice, as long as they don't eat you.

Actually, being a fish, you'd've thought I'd have been caught by now...

But no...

So, I no longer fear death! I laugh in the face of Danger! "Hahaha"

(But only behind it's back when it can't hear me..!)

*Goes off to hide in some coral before he gets eaten...*

Actually, being a fish, you'd've thought I'd have been caught by now...

But no...

So, I no longer fear death! I laugh in the face of Danger! "Hahaha"

(But only behind it's back when it can't hear me..!)

*Goes off to hide in some coral before he gets eaten...*

Hmm, not my day really...

Laughing in the face of Danger is one thing, laughing in the face of a 60 foot Gurgantuan Mega Teethicon is likely to get you chopped up into little bits... It's very sensitive as it was bullied at school for being ugly and having to wear braces on it's teeth.

I went to school with a 60 foot Gurgantuan Mega Teethicon and it used to steal the fruit my mother put in my packed lunch.

That's typical of it - first despised and ugly, and then the school bully. I mean, we have some monstrous monsters here - nasty things. All teeth and no toothbrush, if you know what I mean.

*trying to find out how many meters 60ft might be*
I boyfriend I once had was a Gurgantuan Mega Teethicon, but only 30 foot tall. Probably still a baby...
But still - don't call him nasty. Teethicons are very sensitive.
Have you ever seen a Leberknoedelus Monster?

A Leberknoedelus Monster? No, I don't think I have... The name's familiar, but I cannot picture it. Could you tell me about them, please?

Well, they mainly live in the Alps, but I'm sure you'll find one or two in the Sewer.
They are about 20 foot high, mainly green or blue. Very furry. They don't have any teeth. They don't eat, just drink mineral water.
On Friday the 13th they can fly.

Wow - I didn't know about them. Still, they sound quite friendly.
What do you feed them?

Just Mineral water.
Someone once made one eat liver dumplings.
On Christmas they eat chocolate and on the fifth of December they eat birthday cake. (my birthday, I always invite a few Leberknoedeluses)