h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*wonders what the sharks will make of this argument*

[Mackenzie] I don't think I'll ask them ...

Wait, are these LOAN s?

No, they're the kind that eat people.

*Wanders by with competion bikini showing sunset over a tropical island*

Hi folks, don't forget voting has now started in the 4th competion!

With a bikini like this how could you not vote for me?

I don't think they're loan s, as far as I know they're here on a permanent basis.

Actually voting isn't supposed to start until Thursday - I just got everything ready in time...

<BB<

[Mackenzie poses in her shimmering green bikini with the butterfly wings and green aura]

* MaW poses in his bikini cunningly crafted from nothing at all *

It's an ultra lightweight bikini, you see, and doesn't leave any tanning lines. Never needs washing, and doesn't split or fray, or fade in the sunlight.

* he puts up a large placard, which reads "Vote MaW, vote for the world's most practical bikini" *

*strolling along the water's edge in her covered lace-trimmed bikini with belly-exposing corset top*

*the ankle chain with tiny silver bells tingling with every step she takes*

*sun-bleached hair flying in the wind*

*squatting every now and then to inspect something closer*

*collecting tiny white shells*

*poses in her aquamarine bikini with invisibly attached fish that appear to be swimming across the fabric*

*holding up a placard..*

'No fish were harmed in the making of this bikini'

*comes strolling from the other direction, her gold lamé bikini glittering in the sun and the fringes of the red scarf tied around her hips swaying with every step*

*makes sure the bright red hibiskus flower is still firmly attached to her dark hair*

Hola!

* strikes an alternative pose - legs spread, knees bent, hands on hips, chest thrust out, groin thrust backwards *

* wobbles *

* falls flat on his face and chokes on some sand *

Okay, that's not a good pose.

* gets up and proceeds to do some Tai Chi, showing off how his bikini, cunningly crafted from nothing at all, completely fails to restrict his movements in any way whatsoever *

[Mackenzie drinks some Chai Tea. ]

*swims in the warm sparkling water*

[Mackenzie] Hey! You aren't /swimming/ in your /bikini/, are you??

HEY, MaW, LOOK OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!





Sorry, thought I saw something.

* bloke's wearing a lovely radioactive atoll for the bikini competition at A781148 *

*staggers by in his preposterous black and white cow hide bikini now complete with udders looking for the tasteless vote*

* absently causes his modified placard to catch fire *

Red Dog, how good to see you! Isn't that a bit hot?

Come on in Mackenzie, the water is lovely!

Can't have a bikini that isn't functional, must be against the Trade Description Act, or something!