h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*is still cowering in hoLE* Axe, I see you have come to the side of enlightenment! OhmGOOohm

Somethink like that... I decided that my teachers could go and die if they don't think this is 'schoolwork'

What don't I have to offer. I feel that a person with lack of sense of reality is needed by people of derring do, and if I'm not accepted into the mercenaries, I'll hire each one of you to assassinate each other, then you'll be in trouble.

Ah, but we work as collective entity, which means we'd quite probably realise what you were doing and assassinate you.

Added to the fact that Krans and I are very great friends, and would without fail, fail to assasinate each other, preferring to take the money to kill everyone else and then disappear.

Anyway, if we did descend into anarchy, I'd win. Because I'm evil, and I have the bigggest guns.

How, precisely, does a sense of reality come into play, out of interest?

njan & co., would you mind helping out SM?

*opens up a breifcase, which holo-projects job information*
OPPONENT: Cat Borg Collective
OBJECTIVE: Retrieve and generally save the @$$ of Seargeant Mushroom before she is assimilated, without being assimilated yourself.
LOCATION: ACF Shooting Range
PAYMENT: 50 Million Credits upon Borg eradication, possible reward from RD/ex-R, 10 Million in advance.
*credits lay below holo-projector*

St. John, you can come along, too, but you don't get any money...

It's urgent. If you accept, join me at F84221?thread=187208 and HURRY!

Sense of reality is not needed as it only gets in the way of courage. You need courage to do dangerous stuff, and danger is your job.

*suits up*

Good, something to do. Anyone else coming?

axe, the rescue's not over. We're in close combat. I should get Myst... or Njan... but, if you can point and shoot, we need you in the cupboard corridors... follow the link on the borg page...

Did I say it was?

ok, guys, alternative assignment.. also, I've started on a nice constitution for us, so we're all codified and official. (and as a privilege of rank, leaders have to agree on assignments and assign personnel to assignments) *grins*... *power goes to head*

we're being payed 75 million credits by the borgs to stop attacking them, and provide protection for drones and borg assets from anyone attacking them. ...so shake hands with the drones, and we'll set up shop down there. .. Doikk, the usual support is what we'll need, Krans likewise. I'll set up a few hidey holes. We won't need much transport, other than the usual emergency exit procedures, so you guys can have some fun setting up sandbags, patrol routes, and looking menacing.

Also, it'd help in forums very much indeed if the tagline "h2g2 mercenary" or "mercenary [job]" were in your name, in addition to the fact that otherwise you'll be up for assimilation. ..those guys might not assimilate without consent, but they're pushy in attempts to get said consent.

any questions?

Well, I can buy that... However, I have loyalties to my staff, so the rescue of SM stands, although it is no longer a mercenary action.

Ah.. in which case, for the purposes of this operation, we have a conflict of interests. *thinks*

If you're rescuing SM, I'm afraid you'll be off the team roster, and so you're fair game in terms of things to shoot at, if you're obstructing what we're paid to do.

Not really brilliant for team spirit, but still. *wonders whether Venom should be excused one lapse of teamplaying from the mercenaries or not*

My person and staff comes first, and the mercs second. apologies. Besides, my op was not originally a merc op. It's a personal thing.

In which case, regrettably, we may have to ask you to retire. I think it would go against the spirit of a group of operatives as ..intimate.. as the mercenaries to abstain from activities, particularly in order to work for what is, after all, a contrary end.

ok, guys, I've made up a little prospectus / infosheet type guide entry on the mercenaries. .. so that we have a more dictionary-like presence, and so that our presence is even more distributed (and thusly harder to disrupt). As well as making it factual, I tried to capture some of the style of the mercenaries, so that it imparts the feel of how we operate as well as just a description of it. Tell me what you think, people. A763742

*claps* Well done... I posted some discrepancies to the page itself...

>> "any questions? "

Yes. I take it everyone knows that Sgt. Mushroom's trying to deassimilate Apollo in the Cat Induction Centre thread?

Being as Apollo is a 'borg asset', I take it we're supposed to protect him. Therefore, I'd like to know what CV'd do if I tried to knock SM out with a tranquiliser dart (or something like that).

Therefore:

1. Njan: Permission to attack SM, who we were previously supposed to protect.

2. CV: Do you really need a security guard..?

Axe, if you're threatened by SM, or our clients are threatened by SM, you have my full permission to carry out whatever actions you deem necessary. *smiles* ...after all, w.. you're being paid.

Aha.. circumstances are slightly different to those which we normally encounter.

I'm going to suggest (request firmly) that no-one, please, opens fire without having due reason. (I'd prefer if they didn't fire until hostilities were opened by myself, should we have to resort to violence, but recognise that that might not be possible, or desired. Still, please. *sweet smile*) In addition, it may be pertinent to review, should you not have already done so, the list of saberhagen swords which are listed in a guide entry by Red Dog. I also have a fair amount of information extraneously to h2g2, should you wish to contact me in a manner not [quite so] publicly viewable (ie. E-Mail).

Krans, if you're alive, I believe I count myself correct in saying that you have a fair degree of.. knowledge.. which would apply excellently to this situation, so if you are in a position to do so, I have no doubt that you'd make an excellent front line man, should you care to tread the field beside me. I may well prod you privately and have a word with you.

Other than that, I'm going to issue you, Axe, with a backup weapon which may well come in handy at some point during the situation. *hands a large sniper case to Axe*. You, also, I may well have a word with privately.

Other mercenaries are encouraged either to assume unintrusive positions where they might come in handy further down the line, or - should you be in a position to help out in the situation which we already have on our hands (and I'll leave this judgement to your discretion) - unobtrusively join myself and Axe (and Krans) in the positions in which we find ourselves.

Above all, read the backlog, and know your enemy (so it goes without saying that everyone should read up on the weaponry which Red Dog is packing - see above)



have fun, guys.