h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I don't have a problem with it being invented in an advert, as there's a need for such a word and all words have to be invented at some time. But I do have a problem with people swallowing everything they hear in adverts as though it's incontrovertible truth - such as marmite being the only food that possesses the special quality of being either liked or hated.

Oi! I work in advertising!



for his life

The way you try to get a cool email address but someone's been there and done that.

"Black cat" people. If you had a black cat, they would have one that was bigger, blacker, and cattier. If you climb a mountain, they once climbed a bigger, steeper, more dangerous mountain. And they did it faster, too. And so on.

Hey!
Not all black cat people are like that! I have a black cat and the only thing he is is stupider. (I mean, I love him and all, but he doesn't have a whole lot in the intelligence department as compared with other cats.)
I guess I must be the exception that proves the rule, huh?

Male cats & female dogs - just don't

Toenails What was the maker thinking when she stuck b toenails on us!!!!???!!!?!?!//!?!!!11/!?!?!

s! (s for cover, apologising...)

People who use unnecessary abbreviations and acronyms. (Posted on behalf of a lazy person, BTW!!!!)

There's a programme called History Hunt in the morning with Bill Oddie. Unfortunately the blonde lady who presents it with his is the worst and most annoying TV presenter I've seen. (Actually there are so many 'worst' TV presenter she must be 'worsest')

. . . . level crossing gates that close half an hour before a train goes throught them . . . people who park in bus stops . . . pedestrian crossing lights that change THE MOMENT someone presses the button . . .

People who park lengthwise on footpaths, or even tossers who drive down the pavement in their BMW 3-series Cabrio!!!!!

MuseSusan,

I'm not complaining about those who own black cats, merely the sort of "been there, done that, but I did it better" mentality.

The Woolworths Christmas ads.

The woman doing the voiceover is constantly SHOUTING throughout the entire advert. Does she think viewers are stupid?

What's almost as bad is that she's shouting with a smile on her face.

Absolutely. *All* shouted TV and radio adverts. There's a very annoying guy shouting to advertise beds - the ironic opposite of restful.

Oh, one of my pet hates has got to be chatty checkout assistants or sales staff who ask you 'do how are you today, how was work?" as if they bloody know youThe clones at my local Asda(recently aquired my Walmart..) have been programmed to do this now.. spot the American influence.
I'm tempted to say "just f**k off and do your job"... or is that a little extreme?
Phoney friendliness

"just f*ck off and do your job"



The secret is : when someone makes an inane comment to fake friendliness, button hole them for ages when answering their question. I recently cornered someone and went into a long monologue about clouds when they commented on the weather.

Please feel free to descend on the WalAsdaMarts in and around Derby and confuse all the staff you can find

I kind of like the idea of shop assistants in big shops doing what assistants in little shops used to do. ie Talking to folk. OK you lot and me have got h2g2 and real friends but seem people dont and can miss that interpesonal stuff.





Bloody high heeled shoes whats the point of them.

"Thye make your legs look better" no they dont my legs look great because I do sports why not try that.

"They make you look taller and slimmer" no they dont well maybe to idiots but anyone else can see you're a short arsed barrel of lard in uncomfortable shoes.

What high heels do is cause you spinal problems that put a burden on the already overstretched NHS, ruin wood floors and make it impossible for women to move along a crowded pavement at a decent pace.

Quite.

And leggings. And headbands. Not hairbands, those elastic things tennis players in the 80s had to wear to keep their hair out of their eyes.

They have they're uses in sports but yes, out in the real world, I can see your point

And minifans.