h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Oh, that reminds me of my grandma's lecture 'bout our manners...

go on........

I did and it didn't get posted!

As most people here know, Mike and I are a RL couple. He was staying here, in Israel, with me, and we went to see my dad one weekend. My grandparents came too, and so did my aunt and her husband, and my uncle and his family, so the house was too crowded, and I naturally say in Mike's lap, and naturally also kissed him on occasion.
The next time I called to tell my dad we're coming over, he said that my grandma asked if we could be more restrained when we're in her company. So we were. We just sat next to eachother, didn't even kiss, I think, all to make her comfortable.
Last weekend I was there. She and my grandpa, inlove like teenagers as ever, were all over eachother, laying together on the sofa.
It was sweet to watch, but do you sense double standards there?

I just remembered a really embarrassing episode from my college days.

I was in the foyer of the college library, just in front of a pair of swing doors, when I saw a man in a wheelchair trying to get the doors open on the other side of the doorway. So, being the good samaritan, I pulled open the doors for him.

Unfortunately, now I was blocking his way, with both doors now pulled back, and me there straddling the exit. There were other people now behind the man in the wheelchair, so I got a rush of blood to the head, and left go of both doors.

Wham. They crashed straight into the poor bloke in the wheelchair. MUCH to the disapproval of all the onlookers...

I slinked off out of the place as fast as I could ...

Woodpigeon

ooh dear...
^. .^
= ' =

Zactly...

And the other wooden tops stood there in judgement with out coming forward to help hold the doors open. When a task is too great for one alone it takes a team to make a fiasco.

Don't swet it, next time take charge and direct the dummies.

I just remembered something. At school we weren't allowed to have mp3's on the computers. But we still sat and played them. One day the teacher came into the room while I was there with some others. I had a pair of loudspeakers hooked to the computer. I was also surfing the net and was at that time on the HampsterDance website. So the teacher gave me an earful for having been listening to music. That was a bit embarrasing. Then as he left I had turned the music off and such, but I then hit refresh or something on the HampsterDance page. So suddenly their tune boomed out of the speakers. Didn't seem the proper thing to play to a teacher who'd just been yelling at you.

seems fine to me
^. .^
= ' =

A comedy of errors

Once upon a time, I went to live in a big city in another country where only about 5 people knew me.
One day, I was walking home after a *very* long night out on the town (it was definitely daylight, maybe even as late as noon) and still very much under the influence .
Grace Jones was playing, very, very loudly, on my walkman.
I was singing along
Suddenly I needed to spend a penny, so I popped into a bar.
Just as Grace (and I) started singing the chorus of
I need a Maaaaan!
It was a gay bar.
Which I didn't realise until about 20 Village People lookalikes all turned their heads to see who was singing

As if this wasn't enough,
On the way past the bar, someone pinched my b*m!
I just kept on walking!
On the way back from the loo, I saw who it was.
It was a *happily married* friend of the family back home!

I'm not sure who was more embarrassed

that's almost too funny to be true!
^. .^
= ' =

ok, this is embaressing....

....finding out your mum is an ant and dec fan!

FABT

^. .^
= ' =

I'll not hear a word said against Ant and Dec!!

Not by FABT's mum, certainly

Ant and Dec aren't they the two Human Clones made from Smashy and Nicey's DNA. trialed them before successfully cloning Dolly

i think she called them 'those nice young men'! she's turned into my gran!

I'm willing to hear several words said about Ant and Dec if it helps FABT

That wheelchair thing reminds me of a particularly embarrassing moment.
One day, when I was waiting for my train to arrive I spent my time listening to my walkman and just generally day-dreaming and totally ignoring what was going on around me (NEVER a good idea). I had put my big, very very heavy bag down in front of me when after a few minutes, I saw a white stick appearing just at the edge of my vision, then a hand, an arm, then the blind man all this belonged to. That is, I didn't see *him* until he was lying flat down on the ground, having stumbled over my bag.
I felt about a hundred eyes piercing my back as I was helping him up, apologizing about a million times.