h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I love Wilde...

"Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much."

"I sometimes think that God, in creating man, somewhat overestimated his ability."

"The cynic knows the price of everything and the value of nothing."

"The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it."

No Bible Thumpers!!!
~the sign on my front door~(not MY fav. quote, however tis the fav
of many friends...tisk-tisk...)

Mine is "errr" because it's in nearly every film ever made, yup even the foreign ones tooo!! Look out for it, there is always somebody who says "errr" at the start or in the moddle of their dialogue, sometimes it's the only bit the character has, ex: "errr" , the dude is now dead.... see what I mean.

"Get in the back of the van!"

*Waits for the W&I fans to come out of the woodwork *

Aimed at those who try to dumbfound us with statistical info...

By 2020 one in three of the world's population will be elvis impersonators

it tends to stop them dead in their tracks

Thought of another one... its from JAWS when chief Brodie sees the Shark for the first time.

"we need a bigger boat..."

its sort of become my mantra when faced with imposible odds. Another one to start the work week is...

"onwards and downwards"

it works for me

"When I was 7, I got dressed up as a little city gent and walked into the bank of England shouting F*** the pound."

-Bortsal old man, Brasseye, 1997.

...guess you have to see it but it makes me laugh like a drain.
Chris Morris is a genius!

...also I'm the first Withnail fan to come out of the woodwork,

"Boy lands plum role for top Italian director, probably on a tanner a day and I know what for, 2 pound 10 a tit and a fiver for his arse!"

I'm paraphrasing here slightly:

"So there it is; paedophiles actually have more DNA in common with crabs than with humans. That's a scientific fact. There's no evidence for it, but it's still a scientific fact."

I think it was DJ Fox who said that part, in deadly earnest of course.

>"Get in the back of the van!"
>*Waits for the W&I fans to come out of the woodwork *

"I mean to have you, even if it means burgulary."

I've got the W&I blob on my personal space.

Liam.

From Meet Ricky Gervais while interviewing Paul Daniels:

"My uncle was a magician, he only had one trick and it wasn't very good. He would get me and my friends to come round and he would put his top hat on his lap and let us all feel the rabbit; it didn't have any hair or ears. I don't know what happened to him, I think my dad and my brother burned his house down."

Liam.

I've started watching that now on Ch 4. Roll on Monday and the new series of The Office!

My computer shutdown noise is 'I' saying:

"Why has my head gone numb?"

That's what's on UK TV and WE still get
MODERATED?!?
~me, just now~
~Pandora...b.a.t.s

Slightly pedantic perhaps but the Head Gone Numb line is Withnail...
just so you know.

Far out.
~me, jussss now~

I think the horticulture one is Dorothy Parkers...
cheersismarah(better late than never)

"Schnarf schnarf..."
Schnarf, 'Thundercats'

I don't know where its coming from. "Never argue with idiots, they drag you down to their level and beat you with experience!"

"if you want me to leave, you can put your hands on my hot, tight little body and make me" Spike from Buffy

An aspiring society hostess sent G B Shaw a card saying "Lady X will be at home on yyzz. Shaw sent a reply saying "G B Shaw likewise"

Don't knock Masturbation. It's sex with someone I love.

Woody Allen