A Conversation for The Mother of All Gooses

The Stage

Post 81

Mysterious Stranger

*looks around for damsels in distress*

*discovers that Madame Pansy has disappeared*

*mutters to himself* Ah, mais merde - she is fast, that one, no?

*squats down next to Thistle Howl*

'allo my dear - what are you looking for? May I assist you?

The Stage

Post 82

Mary and her full-grown <sheep>

*A young lady rushes towards the stage from the wings. She abruptly slows to a walk and saunters casually onto the stage. The effect is somewhat lost as a large smiley - sheep barrels into her from behind, bowling her over. The sheep skids to a halt and looks out at the audience with very wide eyes. It scampers back to the young lady, who is just getting up, and tries to hide behind her. The lady scowls at the sheep, then at the audience.*

I had a song all ready, but now I've forgotten it. smiley - cross

The Stage

Post 83

Titania (gone for lunch)

*elbows Witty*

A new character!

*applauds politely*

The Stage

Post 84

Robyn Bankes


Did someone mention eggs?

The Stage

Post 85

Mysterious Stranger


*gets up with some difficulty, approaches the lady witht he smiley - sheep*

Ahem.. if I may, Mademoiselle?

Mary had a vampire bat
His fur was black as night
He followed her to school one day
And promised not to bite

She brought him out for show-and-tell
The teacher screamed and ran
And school was cancelled for a week
Just as Mary planned

*winks at Mary*

*a smiley - bat flutters down from above and settles on Mary's shoulder*

The Stage

Post 86


The Stage

Post 87


*waves to Peta*
Don't worry you haven't missed much. They're getting ready to look for the eggs. smiley - chick
Want somesmiley - popcornanyone? Caerwynn?
smiley - bluefish

The Stage

Post 88


*winks at coelacanth*

Applaudes wildly!

*takes a handful of smiley - popcorn* smiley - smiley

Watches intently... smiley - bigeyes

The Stage

Post 89

dElaphant (and Zeppo his dog (and Gummo, Zeppos dog)) - Left my apostrophes at the BBC

smiley - dog <-- barks at the duck, and twice at the smiley - sheep

The Stage

Post 90

Three Blind Mice

1: I smell the pine this way.
2: I smell it too.
3: Jump!

*the mice all jump and land on the tree more or less successfully, causing the branches to sway rather alarmingly*

2: Is this where we run up the clock?
1: We're being upstaged by a flock!
3: My whiskers have taken a knock.
1: The audience has gone into shock!
2: Miss Pansy is changing her frock...
3: The new one looks more like a smock.
1: I forget where I've hidden the Glock.

*they all go silent for a few moments*

2: *aside* We'll find some other way.
3: Marks!

*they scamper up to the very top of the tree and pose around the star*

smiley - mousesmiley - esuomsmiley - mouse

The Stage

Post 91

Thistle Howl - a frighteningly cute Critter of the Night

*pouts. For a second there the really cool Stranger was about to pay attention to her...then the adult women came on stage. Sigh!
She feels better moments later when the Stranger begins to recite.*

Oooooooooooh, neat! That's really, really good!

*she produces a pencil and a little notebook and tries to get it down*

Let's see..."Mary had a vampire bat..."

*she's having trouble writing. Her seat wobbles.*

The Stage

Post 92


*takes some smiley - popcorn and passes the Quality Street round, handily and hygenically dewrapped*

Thanks coely.

The Stage

Post 93

Amy the Ant - High Manzanilla of the Church of the Stuffed Olive

*looks for a triangular one which had formerly been green*

The Stage

Post 94

Buttercup the Pantomime Cow

*from underneath the table*

No wonder it was such a bother
To hide ourselves her under cover
For when poor humpty's fall we broke
It seems we picked up some small bloke
Our increased girth was not the fault
Of cake and pies and single malt
But to hangers-on entirely due
And what comes next we've not a clue
But if you're wise, take our advice
And keep your eyes on those three mice

*struggles to get from under the table and onto her feet*

The Stage

Post 95

Humpty Dumpty (and Chicken Little, his chicken)

*Scrambles out from under the table on all fours, dusts off his knees and stands.*

Did I hear someone say an egg we seek?
Then Lo! stand around rapt and hear me speak,
For certain as my own name is "Humpty"
I search for my long lost brother, Humphrey.

The Stage

Post 96

Buttercup the Pantomime Cow

Only in a pantomime
Could someone venture such a rhyme

The Stage

Post 97

Seven Dwarves

Come, come. We must lead you all,
On a wonderful, fantastical, mystery tour.
Through Garden and Lake,
Through Spire and Jail,
And finally *their voices rise*
To an estate agents.

Grumpy: Bit of an anti-climax
Rest: Shut-up

The Stage

Post 98

Purr in Boots

smiley - cat
**After the debacle with the smiley - mousesmiley - esuomsmiley - mouse, Purr decides to play it safe by teaming with another character.**

Parrdon meow, dearr Miss Thistle Howl. Ai have noticed yeour sseating arrangement is a bit prrecariouss.
**Pulls the stool from in front of the table close to her.**

May Ai assisst yeou in gaining a better vantage point?
**Holds out his arm, then a startled eggspression crosses his face.**

Dearr lady, what IS thiss upon which yeou have perrched?
**He leans closer to examine Thistle Howl's seat. (The Object she's sitting on! Well, okay, maybe the other as well.smiley - winkeye)**

smiley - catsmiley - biggrin

The Stage

Post 99

Mysterious Stranger

*winces as he experiences a sudden stinging sensation between his shoulder blades*

*looks around, confused, but decides to ignore it*

Ladies - are you ready for the tour?

*bows, twirls his moustache, and then offers one arm to Mary and the other arm to Robyn*

The Stage

Post 100

Mary and her full-grown <sheep>

*Eyes light up as the bat lands on her shoulder*

Oh! How did you know?

*Take the stranger's arm and smiles sweetly at him while giving a discrete hand signal to the sheep. The sheep noses it's way between the stranger and Robyn, separating the two.*

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