h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

errrr ... I`m obviously confused ... too many postings. Anyway he`s here now. Can we have turns slapping him

*strains on oars as they pull towards the Marie Celeste*

*The cook truely IS green. And his hands and feet are webbed and he has things that look distinctly like gills on his neck.

As the boat is rowed back, it is suddenly surrounded by 10 creatures resembling the cook (i.e. Green, webbed hands and feet, gills). They look doubtfully from the cook to the others in the boat. One of them addresses the cook.*

We came as fast as we could when you summoned, but you don't appear to be in danger. We noticed some Kraken parts in the water. Has there been a battle here?

*Uli doesn't see this because she has reached the ship, moored her canoe to the line, and climbed on to the deck*

*On board the longboat Martens catches a crab with his next stroke and fall into the bottomm of the boat*

Green ? Gills ..... what the ! Johans ..... we`re surrounded by strange creatures ..... and look at Mr Head. He look`s like, like ... like some kind of

*Scambles to rear of longboat .... realises he has left his weapons on board the Marie Celeste. Brandishes oar*

Mr. Head, what be these things and why be looking like a fish?

Urgh! *passes into unconciousness*

We can deal with Mr. Head when we be aboard the ship. Let us get to rowing this crate please...

*puts his back into it*

Don't be startled, shipmates! I am still your cook, Mr Head. The water has transformed me in ways I will now have to explain to you. These are my kinfolk and we mean you no harm. They came at my call to fight the Kraken.

*to the creatures* Glorple, Bloop - it is good to see you again. And I greet you others whom I do not know and salute you all for coming to our aid. The Kraken has been dealt with by means we could never have employed. A roaring sword the like of which I have never seen was used. We must examine it for ourselves.

Meantime, let us get on board, for now we have doubtless been seen by the others.

*The other gillmen seem to relax and the spokesman speaks to Cook Head*

Well, Glug, we knew a Kraken was in this vicinity and we are happy that you and your, er, friends could overcome it. We need to get back now, but if you need us again, just call.

*The 10 Gillmen swim a little ways off, then submerge and are gone.*

Mr. Head, you should have Mrs. Briggs look at you. You seem a bit under the weather. I be not sure that your green hue is healthy.

Here, this will be a sling to get the Captain safely aboard.

*Enters. Exits*