h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*In the middle of the beach, just behind a sand dune, a round, gilded stone on a chain materializes and drops to the ground.*

*still unaware of her surrounding, briefly wonders why the future uses sand as a floor covering. stumbles and finds herself lying on the beach, her hand touching the chain of the SoulStone*

Where am I?

*Planes fly overhead, followed by loud explosions on the land above the beach. Out to sea, many boats can be seen on the horizon.*

*Feels the surroundings*

Sarah, this is the turning point of one of the greatest future wars of all time. The United States is attempting to invade Normandy. We believe that Lorenzen learned that the Soulstone was going to explode, and so he sent it back in time in an attempt to turn the tide of the war and allow a tyrant named Hitler to rule the world. While it is impossible to gauge how the future would change, it is advisable that the explosion not occur. Well, not here and now, in any event.

*is frightened by the strange noises around her. picks up the SoulStone and clutches it to her chest* But what can I do? I have no control of travelling through time, or I'd be back with my family rather than here...

*looks around now that her vision begins to clear* But then again, I cannot allow these people to be hurt, can I? *thinks for a moment*

~ A pebble suddenly hits Sarah in the head, then falls to her feet where several small stones have been arranged to spell out two letters ~

MC

*looks up, then trails the pebble down. smiles* Captain McClellan! Is that you?

Strength of good and light
So close to my heart
Give me spiritual sight
Let me see and hear all that are.

*The spell is successful! Sarah can now see and hear spirits.*

~ Captain McLellan waves his hand in front of Sarah to see if the spell worked, then realizes he might be attracting the attention of the circus spirit, and ducks behind Sarah so he does not have to rejoin the spirit troops. ~

Prepare to be shocked, Gw7en. McLellan is not alone, and your spell said "see and hear all"

Captain McClellan! So you are real! But why are you hiding? Do come out and tell me if you can help me get back to the Mary Celeste and my family. *looks to see if she can figure out what he is hiding from*

Can't wait to see it, d'E. I am prepared for a shock.

~ McLellan points behind Sarah at the tens of thousands of ghosts who are being marshalled together on the beach. They seem to be assembled from all times and places, leaving barely enough room to move about without jostling each other. ~

O'er there. They've herded us together to help ferry souls, I think. This war has the regulars over-busy, and they say somethin's goin ta happen here today, so they need extra help. I shouldna' left the lines, but I had to see if you were real. An' you are! But how can you still be alive after all this time? That explosion (oh, my poor Mary Celeste!) even killed Volkert and Goodschad, and they were dead already. An' is that Uli there? Or Yclept? I wasn't sure what happened there at the end.

Did you say get back to yer family?

~ McLellan's face turns beet red, passing his hair in its shocking color ~

Don'tell me you didn't know 'bout the explosion! An' now I've gone an broke the news to you without preparin' you.

*is looking at the ghosts in awe when McClellan's words sink in* Explosion... Everyone is... *she turns back to McClellan* How did it happen, Captain? I must know! I must get back and save them! Oh, my darling Benjamin... Dead... *her lower lip trembles and she looks close to collapse for a moment. then she shakes herself and straightens up* No time for that now, Sarah. Hysterics will not save them...

*turns back to the ghosts again* They are expecting many deaths then. We shall see if we can disappoint them. Come with me, Captain. *walks around a dune so that McClellan is safe from prying eyes - spiritual or otherwise*

*For the brief moment that Sarah is in the open between dunes, a machine gun opens up from on the ridge above the beach. Bullets splat into the sand around her feet before she is hidden by the next dune.*

*her heart pounds in her chest* Is that how they shall kill people? That gun fires far too rapidly to be natural. I must remove the spell they have on it. That will save lives...

*closes her eyes, gathers as much magical force from around her as she can and begins*

Chittering bullets fill the air no more
Be still the minions of death
And from their muzzles instead restore
To each their natural breath.

*The spell works! The next time that gun fires, it will only be capable of single shots.*


The secret weapon of the invasion has now been revealed: a Captain's wife from 1872

*thinks out loud to herself* Now then, I need to find a way to either remove the SoulStone or keep it from exploding... *turns suddenly to McClellan and Ulyclept* Do either of you have any ideas?

Explodes? Not again! Perhaps if you get it wet - there's plenty of water.

~ Throws a rock at a Nazi ~

I'd say what I think, but it's Lil's turn to post as Ulyclept.

However, if I could talk, I would suggest the possibility of getting it behind Nazi lines. But that's my bad side talking.