h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Emar: OW!! Who did that?! What's going on out there?!

* the penguin gets out his Very Sharp Knife and starts cutting the plastic case off the other fuse *

[Janine rubs her face where Emar punched it.]

[Janine] Ow. That hurt.

[Emar's hand suddenly feels as though it has been put in a trash compactor.]

[Janine gets to a safe distance from Emar/Zeb, which just happens to be right in front of the frozen bad guys, which just happens to be when they unfreeze.]


I've /really/ got the hang of not making one-post solutions, haven't I? To the point where I'm making one-post catastrophes?

* the penguin, humming quietly to himself, continues to cut the plastic from the fuse with his Very Sharp Knife. Several pieces of it now lie on the floor at his feet *

*GL chooses this moment to bound into the room in wolf form. He leaps up onto the fuses and starts tearing at the plastic coating with his teeth.*

[Penguin] What does it taste like, GL? Never liked plastic myself. Nothing like herring at all.

* he pops a dried herring in his mouth, chews, and continues to slice away. Most of the fuse is now uncovered, and it is nearly ready for attack with a pogo stick *

Hey, Past-Zeb, here's an idea for you: invent a device that'll turn the waves from my polka gun into mosh music.

*Affy blasts the hand puppet with his OmeGauntlet set at "Snowzar-Two Hours". Then, without waiting to see how this will undoubtedly be dodged, Affy finishes cutting off the plastic, and bounces on the top fuse. It shatters*

Someone else take the second one now....

[FD Link takes the second one now.]

I volunteer to be a frozen hero.


mmmppphhhh....mmpppphhhhhh!

Emar(as he and Zeb fall backwards into the temporal rift): OW!! WHAT'S GOING OOOOOOooooooooonnnnnnnn....?!










<Seconds after past Emar & Zeb plummet out of the Universe, there is a tremendous shrieking from inside the mini glacier, and present day Zeb bursts forth from confinement...>

Zeb: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! PAST ME!! WHY?! HE WAS SO YOUNG?! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH...!!!





<...sudenly, Dimmy emerges from the ice.>

Dimmy: You know, sir, Zeb wasn't REALLY killed. Just frozen for two hours. Otherwise you'd be dead as well.

Zeb: Oh.. oh, that's a relief-...AAAAUUUGGGGGHHH!!



Zeb: OW!! OW!! OW!! Thanks for killing my motivation Dimmy! OW!!

*Affy notices the effects of the snowzar finally wearing off, and all of the villains/heroes who were inside shivering off the effects. He also notes that the two fuses have been destroyed, rendering this section of their mission over*

Okay, the Brownian Motion Inducer, the Regulation Control Center, and the Energy Flow Systems are all kaput. One to go: the Neutrino Burst Injector. If my spy notes are correct, that should be guarded by....Sea. Erg. I see some serious continuity breaking coming up....

*Glances at Zeb and GL*

Okay you two, stop playing by that pit-of-certain-death. I mean sure, at first it's all fun and games, but then someone falls in and begins screaming their lungs out, eventually falling to one side and scraping of painful amounts of their body on the walls of the pit, and getting shocking zaps from the electrical equipment, and eventually dying as you splatter onto the ground. Or something. Anyway, I think it's time for us to head out.

*Sees several hurt looks from some of the bad guys*

Oh, okay. We can stay for five posts before we have to go to the Neutrino Burst Injector. So start fighting, if that's what you want.

*The previously sad villains become happy*

*giggles*

* the penguin disentangles himself, sniffs contemptuously at Zeb and waddles over to Affy *

[Penguin] Shall we go?

[Janine] Yeah, in three more posts.

[Penguin] I'm not waiting that long!

* he waddles off back to the main floor *

*GL attacks Zeb and nearly pushes him into the pit-of-doom, but Zeb manages to cling to the edge somehow. GL turns to walk away whereupon Zeb grabs his tail and pulls him towards the pit-of-doom. GL's claws make scratches in the floor as he is dragged inexorably toward the pit. Suddenly, GL stops resisting, which throws Zeb off balance and he falls on his bum. GL wrenches his tail out of Zeb's grip and bounds for the door.*

*UH kicks Zeb on the way out. Wel, he was frozen, angry and mischievous (6 posts after all)*

Later, Zeb. It's been real!

*Affy heads back to the main hall....After casting a "Yozozo" spell at the heating ducts, hoping that it'll turn out useful again soon*

[YK's characters exeunt]

Zeb: Well. I think that went... rather well.