A Conversation for H2G2 Waterworks: The Lifeguard Hut

Soul lifeguards

Post 41

Bluebottle

The chief lifeguard is - has no-one looked at the main page at all?


Soul lifeguards

Post 42

Sandwich Maker

*blinks eyes rapidly, gazes in awe through tears at beautiful pool and sunshine*
So this is what the world looks like outside that bar...WOW!!!! I think I might have to give up my duties as bar wench and move my sandwich making ventures out here. Are all the lifeguarding positions filled? I would enjoy guarding a life, just not sure if I am actually up to saving any, just guarding that's all....


Soul lifeguards

Post 43

Bluebottle

Yep - the beach and the pool are what the world looks like outside the bar. So, what position as a lifeguard would you like, Sandwhich Maker? Or if you head to the beach, you can get a job there if you would like.

The rest of you - as you cannot, unfortunately, use your helicopters in the swimming pool, as shop steward I have campaigned and got you the right to have your own V. fast speedboats. Afterall, the swimming pool is so huge that you "need a bl**dy gondola to get about". What kind of speed boat would you like?


Soul lifeguards

Post 44

saffire

instead of a speed boat -- could i get a jet ski? ive always wanted one of those!
thankssmiley - winkeye
-saffire


Soul lifeguards

Post 45

Bluebottle

Yes, you can have a jet-ski! One jet ski coming up smiley - smiley Any extras that you want with it?
Unfortunately, the rest of us cannot have speedboats, the deal crashed at the last minute (nasty speedboat company) but I have managed to negotiate with Saunders-Roe of the Isle of Wight, and they are sponsoring us by building us some hovercraft. (The variety not full of eels.)


Soul lifeguards

Post 46

Roasted Amoeba

I could always do some alterations on my Sea King helicopter to get it to operate indoors...

Pweeeeeese?


Soul lifeguards

Post 47

saffire

thanks bluebottle!
how can a helicopter operate indoors??
-saffire


Soul lifeguards

Post 48

Bluebottle

I don't know - but as you're an amoeba, you can fit in a radio-controlled sea king helicopter that Would fit in the pool. By the way, why are you a lifeguard anyway as if you're amoeba size, how are you going to give mouth-to-mouth anyway as you have no mouth? You're more likely to be swallowed.


Soul lifeguards

Post 49

Roasted Amoeba

When somebody, particularly a bikini babe, needs saving, I miraculously metamorphose into a handsome hunk, and then I can give them mouth-to mouth... resuscitation, that is... smiley - smiley


Soul lifeguards

Post 50

Bluebottle

Ah, I understand... smiley - winkeye
If I see any female amoebas, I'll let you know.


Soul lifeguards

Post 51

Roasted Amoeba

A handsome HUMAN hunk, that is... so I can help female humans just as much as female amoebas... smiley - smiley


Soul lifeguards

Post 52

Bluebottle

Yes, I can appreciate that.


Soul lifeguards

Post 53

Roasted Amoeba

That's good, as long as you don't think I'm limited in my lifeguarding abilities...


Soul lifeguards

Post 54

Bluebottle

I would never dream of thinking that!


Soul lifeguards

Post 55

saffire

i didnt even know amoebas had gender! (i was going to write 'had sex' but that would just be sillysmiley - smiley)
-saffire


Soul lifeguards

Post 56

Bluebottle


Soul lifeguards

Post 57

Bluebottle

I didn't think they did... Still, RA seems to think that he'll only kiss/ I mean give mouth-to-mouth to female persons.


Soul lifeguards

Post 58

Roasted Amoeba

I am MALE! I think... Let me just check... Yep! I am! smiley - smiley


Soul lifeguards

Post 59

Bluebottle

And he's smiling too, folks! smiley - smiley


Soul lifeguards

Post 60

saffire

awwwww isnt RA so so happysmiley - smiley
-saffire


Key: Complain about this post

Soul lifeguards

Write an Entry

"The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is a wholly remarkable book. It has been compiled and recompiled many times and under many different editorships. It contains contributions from countless numbers of travellers and researchers."

Write an entry
Read more