h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Well, I seem to be on my own here, haven't seen anyone for days.
I'm not panicking, I'm not panicking, I'm not panicking, I'm not panicking, I'm not panicking...

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!

I'm having my little radioactiv guard monster with me, everything's alright....

Where is it! my monster is gone, I'm on my own again...
There's nothing to panic about, everything's alright...

I'm not panicking,I'm not panicking,I'm not panicking,...

Oh my god, what's that thing in the corner?!
Phew, that was just a mirror, that was me.

*lurking under the sufrace of the murky water before bracing himself to strike...*

SPASH!!!! RAAAAARR!!!!!!!!

*tee hee*

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

*faints*

*waking up*

Oh my god, what was that?!

*decides to use the Toilet Water Spray as Pepper Spray to defend against attacking monsters, just attacking ones, not the nice ones. And against this */("§$%$%'# Guard monster, which has chosen to disappear*

Stupid radioactiv monster...

all alone, snief

(A distant voice echoes from a protruding iron pipe)

Hannah - I'm up on the space station - I think I may have seen your monster walking lost around the "Rehab wing"...? Why not teleport up to the Great Hall and grab some snacks while you wait...

http://www.h2g2.com/forumframe.cgi?forum=37821&thread=49748

No need to panic, your monster just had to go to the Little Monster's room to powder his, erm, antennae. He's here, guarding you safely now.
And so are we. Try not to wonder off next time.

Sorry

Still, I'm not surprised you decided to have a good look around - I don't blame you.
So, what did you see?

A lake with a big fat worm in it. Well, a worm with many teeth. More a dragon or something. But nice, actually.
And a lot of little violet beasts, just a few inches high. But cute, in a strange way. I love it.

Yes, I must admit that the sewer does always hold surprises, and that you never know what you're going to see next... So much beauty and ugliness crammed into so small a space that whereever you look your eyes are feasted.

Is there beauty down here but me?
(just kidding)
That slimy somthing in the corner is also quite pretty.

Yes, there is a lot of beautiful monsters down here - haven't you heard of "Beauty And The Beast"? It's a veritable Jim Henson fantasy world, with mopre weird and wonderful creatures than the Brother's Grimm could possibly imagine.
Not everything that's beautiful is friendly, though, but not everything that's ugly is dangerous.

I haven't seen all of it, but I'm exploring the sewage. And I've seen nice things here
I like dragons very much. They're beautiful, aren't they?

Beautiful, but dangerous if you make them laugh...

(There's a LOT of methane down here, for obvious reasons )

That's why all H2G2 sewer dragons come with an amazing CO2 fire-extinguisher at no extra cost.

oh right, I was already wondering.
still they are sweet, aren't they
*walks over to a baby dragon, baby sees her, smiles, she makes a funny face, baby laughs.*
aaaah
that hurts.

Yes.... We've got to install better air circulation equipment, trouble is the maggot worms keep eating the fans and the nanobots cause havoc with the wires....
But they are very beatuful - you should see one fly! Shame we don't have a lot of room in the sewers for them to spread their wings...

*Dons fireproof gauntlets and picks up a baby dragon*

Watch this...

*Spreads the little dragon's wings and makes a few small adjustments to the trailing edge angle, before checking the wind and launching it down the tunnel where it performs some beautiful sewerobatics before 'Split-S'ing back round and perching on TY's arm*