h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*The raft auto-compensates for RD's weight.*

*Boards the raft and sits as far away from Red Dog as he can.*

I'd like to ask everyone to keep all flames or burning embers etc. away from Red Dog. Thanks.

*Looks down*

Oooooo. You can see everything! It's like floating on air.

*peers over the edge*

I think we ~are~ floating on air. The raft is an inch or so above the water.

*splashes the water and startles the *

I meant floating on air without support, Lil. That's how the transparent hull makes me feel.

*Looks down through the hull. Sees fish skittering around because of the disturbance. GL takes a Crater Fizz out of Affy's pack, twists off the cap and tosses the cap overboard. Watches as the cap sinks through the water. Fish rush up to investigate, then rush away again. The cap sinks down into the entrance to the underwater tunnel, then is lost from sight.*

I'll never forget my first raft trip. It started with the Frigid River near Flood Control Dam #3.

Oh, wait....but then it ended at Aragain Falls.

Gotta love my luck with water.

*Watches the water beneath him*

So very cool! You don't often get this many varieties of fish in one enclosed area. You've got some tropical, some typical blind cave fish, some more domestic types....if the fate of our timeline weren't at stake, it'd be worth studying this place.

*helps herself to from the machine*

Might as well use the time wisely whilst waiting for everyone to board

*When no one is watching, what looks like a hand comprised entirely of water rises out and touches the raft a few times, as if testing to see what its made of and how well it was manufactured. Once it has satisfied this curiosity, the hand quickly submerges back into the water, vanishing from sight*

*sits in the raft, finally having recovered from the sense of awe that has kept her silent for the last week or so*

*sees ripples in the water that look mildly suspicious*



*reaches into the Pocket, removes a black wristband, and puts it on*

*When the last member of the party boards the raft, GDZ deploys the defenses*

What is it, sea? GDZ, did you see something?

*nervously dons her bright green glove on the right hand and unholsters the nanogun with the left*

Oh, tea!
*reaches for a cup with her right hand and sends the mug sailing across the top of the water. Somewhere out of range of their lights there is a crash as the porcelain cup hits the cavern wall*

Sorry.

I'm probably being paranoid. But this lake seems... eerie. Let's get going as quickly as we can.

*The water surrounding the raft on all sides, except that nearest shore, subtly rises about six inches and gains something of a crystaline quality, standing a good five inches above the inch of clearance that the boat is getting now*

Underground caverns always feel eerie, it's all that blackness out of range of our lights.

*sips her and switches the carameliser over to 'Freeze'*

*positioned in the middle of the raft, having peered with interest through the hull*

*looks at the water*

*brandishes the CLI umbrella, ready to open it*

Just got a bad feeling about this place. We ready to move?

Yeah.
*sets her nanogun to HARPOON*

*Puts the raft in gear and starts moving across the lake*

*As the raft starts moving, Witty's seat finishes kneading her back and gently taps her on the shoulder to signal that the massage is complete.*

That was wonderful.

This is just like a glass bottomed-boat ride! It reminds me of a vacation I once took in Key West.

*The raised water pushes back against the raft, preventing it from moving. In front of the raft, a shaft of water rises and forms itself into the image of a person*

Lady, this ain't Key West. And it sure isn't a vacation, either. I don't know who you people are, and I don't care. Whether you're after the Kraken or my treasure, there's no way that you're gettin' either.

And on the off chance that you *are* just a bunch of tourists....Stop! Polluting! My! LAKE!

*Smaller shafts of water rise from every side of the boat, form into hands, and toss various bits of debris into the raft, ranging from the shards of Lil's tea cup to a black boot to an aluminum can to what appears to be a sink*

Now get out and stay out. You can pick up my garbage again in another century or so.

*mouth drops open at the sight of the watery being and is lost for words*