h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

The beauty of the second amendment is that it will not be needed until they to count to three

The Fourth Amendment.....

"I Cannot Tell a Lie!!!"



GT

You can fool some people some of the time and most people most of the time and many people much of the time and a few people part of the time and a few others a fraction of the time and the majority of people much of the time and the minority a large percentage of the time and most clocks all of the time and most times part of the time and most fools all of the time and most times part of the time and........er

Lincoln must be rolling over in his grave--laughing.

You can fool all the people some of the time, and some of the people all the time, but you cannot fool all the people all the time
now they have learned to wear tin foil helmets.

You can fool some of the people all the time, and those are the ones you want to concentrate on. George Bush

Who put the overalls in Mrs. Murphy's birthday cake?

why do birds suddenly appear, every time you are near - OI! I want that worm for fishing bait

She got chewing gum on the soles of her shoes

To often, we lose sight of lifes simple pleasures. Remember, when someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles in your face to frown, BUT, it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and right hook that err person.... upside the head

Every day in every way I'm getting butter and making batter.

bloody brilliant - Clueso films

this is capt. james t. kirk of the federation starship enterprise,.....got any porn???

Second star to the right and straight on until that black hole that you didn't notice.

a norse, a norse my kingdom for a norse?????

"Come into my worldwide web site," said the spider to the fly.

“Do or do not... there is no why.”

Scotty, beam me abroad -a female or to a warmer country either will do

What's up, nurse?