h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hey Peet I've decided you're a sweetie

Let's alert the media, then.

::tries to ring the media, but the phone is busy::

But you *are* the media!

Which type of medium is Shea, Lady Scott?

Why do you think the phone was busy when I tried to call, Lady Scott?

Medium-rare, Paul.

I know, Lady Scott.

It took me a while to figure it out, too.

Medium rare, eh, Shea? My mis-steak.

That was so clever!

I laughed so hard, my sides hurt.

*Opens the creaking door, peers nervously into the gloom. Finds one of Lady Scot's brooms and brushes away the detritus and dust. Chokes and realises it makes sense to sprinle a little water on the dust. Tries to ignore the various spiders scurrying around! Like a true Brit puts the kettle on for a cupa! Feels rather lonesome! Sips tea and wonders whether anything will happen!*

*something happens*

Yeeeee Haaaaa! but what?

*shrug*

I was hoping you'd tell me!

now you're talking! The place is humming and spinning like a top! Or is that my head after our Ashes celebrations?

*Places a replica of the scared urn on a shelf* Hey that looks in here!

Why is the urn scared, red? Did you scare it?

silly me!

SACRED!

But I suppose it might also be scared in here, what with it being so Ohioan. I can't really imagine that a replica of the ASHES urn has ever been in a little bit of Ohio before!