h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

That's......That's not so bad, actually...

Not so bad!!?? When he turns from Dead Fred the Thirsty Smurf into Weresmurf he's a !!!!

Well, I mean...I'm not saying it's a good thing, but smurfs are pretty small...And I'm thinking weresmurfs probably aren't all that much bigger...So can't we just...Like...Step on him or something?

I've always seen Fred as a human sized smurf - maybe we just need to find someone with very big feet?

Do they have human sized smurfs? I've never seen any that big, before...

I don't think there are any human sized smurfs among the original ones. But Fred is not a real smurf, just a dead human suffering from the Smurf Dicease. So it causes shrinking?

Well, I assumed it did...Granted, I don't happen to have my Smurf Disease Handbook on me right at the moment, though...

Did he turn blue too? I never saw that...

Well...I assume so...I mean...I wasn't actually watching, but...What other color would he turn?

None at all, I was hoping. I sort of saw him like old Fred in a white cap.

I was just thinking, if he shrunk and if he turned blue - how will we know him from all the other smurfs?

Wouldn't he probably be the one running around talking about pi and world domination?

Would he dare that, you think?

I don't know. I think a lot of things.

Wouldn't the old smurf what's-his-name be upset?
And what lot of things are you thinking?

Oh...You know...I think purple's a nice color...And rocks are very hard...And The Matrix was a cool movie...Stuff like that.

You're not afraid of Fred anymore?

Afraid? Who said anything about being afraid? I was more...Concerned...

Ok. Concerned. So, you're not concerned anymore?

Well...I guess maybe I'm a *little* concerned...

How little is *little*?
He's not been here after his escape. He seems to be more into 'Sex Before marriage' and 'Freaky Coincidences' these days.