h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

That's okay. I'm wide awake, already. You'd better keep the to yourself. I wouldn't want you to fall asleep on me.

I'm kind of wide awake too - did some dancing to wake me up earlier. The neighbours didn't like my choice of music though. Italian Celtic folk by their own national bard. Mustards.

No matter what kind of music you listen to, your neighbors will inevitably dislike it. I think that was Newton's fourth law of motion or something.

Well, I guess it's a bit worse when you play the same tune over and over again...

Yeah, probably. It would be much more pleasant if they learned to like it, instead, but they never seem to realize that.

Can't see what's wrong with fiddles and bagpipes.

They have a problem with fiddles and bagpipes? What weirdos.

The song goes like this:

At the market in the East, for two coins, my father bought me a mouse.
Then came the cat and ate the mouse that my father bought.
Then came the dog and bit the cat that ate the mouse that my father bought.
Then came a stick and hit the dog that bit the cat that ate the mouse that my father bought
Then came a fire and burned the stick that hit the dog that bit the cat that ate the mouse that my father bought...

Etc. etc... (lots of verses)

Over and over again...

That reminds me of something that happened to a friend of mine. When he was in college, his neighbor left for the weekend and decided to play a little prank. They turned the stereo up and left Nirvana's "Rape Me" playing on a permanent loop all weekend. He hates that song, now.

I can imagine!

Speaking of pranks, I wish I was strong, and could do like whoever it was - take apart somebody's car when they are away and put it together again in their livingroom!

That would be a nice surprise. You could drive around without leaving the comfort of your own living room.

Back and forth between the sofa and the dining table.

You'd probably end up giving your carpet some much needed redecoration.

Me? No, not me. I don't have a car. Somebody. With a VW beetle.

Yes, of course. I was speaking hypothetically.

I don't even have a carpet.

Well, hypothetically speaking, if you had a carpet...

... and a car. And somebody did this prank on me... I would *not* be very happy, I think.

Well, that's understandable, I think. A lot of people probably wouldn't appreciate that.

But I'd love to try it on somebody anyway.