h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Back after a short while. I hear that Absinthe makes the heart grow fonder.

Either that or it makes your derriere sound like a Japanese motorbike...Absinthe makes the fart go Honda.

Has anyone read "Mots d'heures Gousses Rames"?

My favorite is "Un petit d'un petit, s'etonne aux Halles."
They couldn't put him back tout Gaie de Regennes.

hats hall for rain two me!

can't say hit, never mind read it

It reads like Mother Goose rhymes, but with a French accent.

"Un petit d'un petit" is "Humpty Dumpty."

but just doesn't have the same ring to it

the son is shining and no sine of reignbut dew

U rang, you Tan. Helow, helow no bodie there. Must be wun ov the oringe men!

Orange you going to tell us about the orange men?
As Eire recall, they don't carrot all for conventions.

Kair fur a Tango?

I stayed out of the sun for a week, and now I wonder, where did my tango?

I comb here hand hen joy the banter, honey wish eye could hunger stand hit

You comb hair often? I thought you were a vacuum... (airless)

hair less hide somewhere else

The mantra for bald men is:

"Hair today, gone tomorrow."

I was going to have a Beach Boys cut, but the bar-bar-bar bar-barber ran away.

I love what the Beach Buoys did to California gulls.

har you insulating that the beech buoy's aren't much cop, cloud dare ewe, hen again, I wan't inn too them as such

Gud, Gud vibe rators owt on the soup Jon Bee.

What kind of music would you play for a President's imbeachment?

I met The Beach Boys at the pub. I said,
'I'll get a round (round, round, round, I'll get a round.'

I hope that's not the one at the strip mall.
I hear it's bugged.
("I'm getting bugged driving up and down the same old strip")