h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Would Hells Kitchen be an ideal place to give the the cold shoulder?

At the Cam-bridge verses University of East Anglia university boat punt race on the river Cam, the boat punters met up by the bridge met up by the bridge of Sighs where the race would start. Many gambling punters would meet to bet on the outcome of the race and would buy punnets of strawberries which was served with cream which they ate as they watched the race. The betting punters would watch the cream of the best boat punters and some would record it using their video-cam recorders.

A lot of people who love boating were gathered to watch me launch my newest invention, a yacht that ran on pelletized plastic supermarket bags. Unfortunately, one spectator got too close just as the yacht backed up against the pier where he was standing. That's when the ship hit the fan.

At the Cam-bridge versus East Anglia university boat punt race on the river Cam, the boat punters met up by the bridge of Sighs where the race would start. Many gambling punters would attend the event and bet on the outcome of the race; while some spectators would buy punnets of strawberries which was served with cream which they ate as they watched the race. The betting punters would watch the cream of the best boat punters and some would record it using their video-cam recorders. Those who lost their bets would breath a heavy sigh when they saw their team lose.

does the shipping forecast mean we're going to get boats/yachts etc falling from the sky ?

Oh for Heavens sake, Prof. Let's have a bit of ,logic here. When did you ,last see etc falling from the sky? Boats maybe.

I couldn't carry away all the trees I had chopped down, so I had to l;eave the backlog behind.

WELL! it HAS been dingy for a while and raining

S it's raining dinghies?

Yacht to know.

Today's rain resembled bicycle spokes. I bet it was recycled

A storm cloud was arrested and hauled into court, where it was arrained.

Barry Allen aka The Flash favourite song is the Flash from the Flash Gordon film. Barry Allen has flashbacks of watching vintage recordings of Flannigan and Allen and the first time he used a flash camera.

Wind-up merchants would wind people up with talking wind up daleks and cybermen.

What is the difference between the Internet and a sword dipped in cinnamon?

One is cyberspace, and the other is saber spice.

we had a clear sky, then a punstantaneous downpour

If a flock of ducks tried to fly into a windmill, you might see an eider downpour.

As a quick as a flash, Flash Harry who travelled from the past St Trinian's school to the future. Flash Harry came as quick as a flash to photograph the Flash with his flash camera.

Sailors would only go sailing when they first saw which way the wind blows so that they only hoisted their sails when the wind was fair. Sailors had to stay sober or if they drank too much navy rum they would be like four sheets to the wind.

Ororo Munroe aka Storm was serving afternoon tea at the Charles Xavier school of excellency when argument with Bobby Drake aka Iceman brought a chill to the air as Ororo did not have the clotted cream and strawberry preserve topped scones the way he liked it. It ended up as a storm in a teacup.