h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I blame 2legs that we had to leave the beach just as our bonfire got going really well. There had been a mountain lion attack in the area, and we have a 4-yearold that wanted to explore

I blame 2legs for #algeriannosewretling and lack of sleep.

I blame 2legs for the lack of profile of #algeriannosewretling and for my making onion and poppy seed bread today

I blame 2legs for copying and pasting part of the message above and so not noticing the lack of an "s" in wretling

I blame 2legs for people on hootoo who stalk me on twitter! #algeriannosewrestling

I blame 2legs for his failure to spot the connection between those two things.

How is Algerian nose wrestling ever to prosper while the bakers of onion and poppyseed bread roam at will through the murky mists of Cambridge town?

I blame 2legs for people not realising that stalking 2legs would be a dangerous and rather messy exprience

I blame 2legs for web2.0 and confusing cross-connections between types of social media I also blame 2legs for the onion and poppy seed bread not being ready to cook, quite yet... but that I do have my betamax casettes of #algeriannosewrestling to entertain me whilst I wait

I blame 2legs for and all the piled up during my three-and-a-half-weeks away from w*rk.

I blame 2legs for the abundance of dandelions in my garden and my wanting to re-wallpaper the office I just visited

I blame 2legs for the bits of useful things I has done today; cleaning lint/fluff off tumble dryer screen-filter, soaking screen-filter, scrubbing screen filter. Making ingenious duster on a stick, using gaffa tape and a chopstick, to clean inside the screen-filter 'slot' on the tumble dryer door, dusting the utility room throughout, cleaning surfaces in kitchen, cleaning fridge, rearranging a few things in the kitchen/tidying. Sweeping utility room adn kitchen, twice, dustpan and brushing up sweepings, finding a lonely looking single sock, mopping throughout, and still having had time to have eaten egg and bacon on toast,plus wash up, plus put stuff way I also blame 2legs for my only just noticibgn how late in the day it is, and I've not even shaved my legs yet, and I might have to go out later hows girl meant to cope?

I also blame 2legs for mops being designed for short people...

I blame 2Legs for always losing my socks in the washing machine, and for not having any mutant/jedi/magical superpowers as it has been a barrier for in finding work as employers want to have employees who an omnipotent like Q in Star Trek.

I blame 2legs that there's nobody to cook me dinner, so I have to do it myself.

I blame 2legs for my parents.We're still in the middle of moving to the new apartment and my bf can't carry things because he was attacked by a dog (no bad bites but it ran at him with great force) and there is so much to do but my parents 'have' to go on holidays next week so I have to watch the cat... And I *told* them I can't really do it at the moment.

I blame 2legs that you need to learn to say "no" to your parents. Or just have the cat move in with you.

I blame 2legs for my having no cat, and no dog I also blame 2legs for the person I was expecting to turn up, not having turned up, and my consequently not knowing if they are just not* turning up, or are silly late

Most of the people in your life appear to be blessed with a well-developed sense of entitlement. And I'm not so sure 2legs is to blame...

If only we could be so sure! 2legs works in mysterious ways!

I blame 2legs for the odd things missing after moving house:

* remote control
* pj bottoms
* two boxes of pushpins

If I could understand why he needs those things

I would say you don't want to know why 2legs wants those items