h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

What you talkin' about Freddy?

That's one of Stings better lyrics. He's using expanding ont he phrase "over the moon". If you cant appreciate the sense of dream like, heart luttering wonder and sense of physical dislocation that occurs in the first rush of love then I feel sorry or you.

As Sho pointed out there are a lot of bad lyrics to be accounted for when it comes to Noel Gallagher but dont knock him or rhymes that odnt work on paper but do when sung in his local accent.

Southerners

ahem! I hope you weren't using the S-word to describe me, Mr. Badger

what about:

Hot dog, jumping frog, Alberquerque (or however it's spelt)

what the heck is that about?

Its about "24 hours From Tulsa", "shwo Me the way to Amarillo"and opther such songs that people have taken to their heart despite knowing little about the subject matter or why the writer inserted the place name or phrase. If you can have cool cats and hot dogs then why not jumping rogs in pop songs?

It's a knowing comment on pop sogs within a pop song like "Song or whoever" by the Beautiul South.

Having just seen We Will Rock You for the first time last night, can I put forward for consideration, heresy though it may be:

I see a little silhouette-oh of a man
Scaramouche Scaramouche will you do the fandango
Thunderbolts and lightning
Very very frightning
Me


(etc etc)

My fave awful lyric is from Madonna:-

"Romeo and Juliet,
They never felt this way I bet"

Heh heh heh

You mention Amarillo, blicky.

There can't possibly be a worse line anywhere than "I've been weeping like a willow" can there?

TRiG.

Agree with you on the Moonlight Shadow thing, Christopher. Of course 4 am is the morning!

Ah, the sun beats down
On my tan on my well-fed body
And the fishermen at the end of the pier
Strike a chord of curiosity
With their thick lines
Yeah, they've caught something big
And they asked me
Can I lend a hand?


This is 'Couldn't know' by Paw. A song about catching a fish?! I mean, ffs!

"Oh baby baby..."

In songs like Britney's 'Oops I Did It Again'. This just translates to me as "We have a five-syllable gap that we can't be bothered to make up lyrics for".

The Black Box title 'Ride On Time' has to be the stupidest lyric. Apart from the fact that the song is crap anyway, how can you ride on time? Ludicrous!

Also that ridiculous 'umbrella ella' phrase on the Rihanna hit 'Umbrella'. Totally pointless!

"To the left/To the left?Everything I won/ In a box to the left"..

I think it's Beyonce. As stupid as Rihanna!

Vicky

No, Della wrong as usual!

"To the left, to the left
Everything *you own*,
in a box to the left"

Its a good song not as good as Rhianna's "umbrella" and besideds filling in the meter with assonance is a trick as old singing. People can stupidly and snobbishly call it stupid because tey dont like, but I dont see people queue ing up to criticise Eric Clapton or singing.

"the sunshine of your lu-uh-uh-uhuhve"


I dont mind people critiscing bad pop music but Umbrella and "Hit me Baby One More time" are top draw.


Sorry TRiG but "Weeping like a willow" is a good i not very inventive similie. In England a folk name for a variety o the tree is "the weeping willow".

I you want a really bad lyric I think these are amongst the worst (apologise if its already been mentioned:

"Life" Desree

Ooh yeah
Oh yeah
Oh Life
Oh Life

I'm afraid of the dark
Especially when I'm in the park
When there's no one else around
Oh I get the shivers
I don't wanna see a ghost
It's the sight that I fear most
I'd rather have a piece of toast
Watch the evening news

(what an utterly *unique* rhyming scheme, I htink its unique because no one else would have the heart to inflict it on people. As or the lyrical content here well where to start? Here's some advice Desree I you haooen to be near an unlit park at night and there's no onelse around stay out of it. Also there are many worse things you could see but if the park is indeed unlit its unlikely you will be able to see any of them anyway)




"Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life
Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life"

In the dictionary next tot he word monotonous is a picture of Desree being handed the Guniess book of records certificate for most monotonous lyrics in a pop song by the members of 2unlimited)



"I'm a superstitious girl
I'm the worst in the world
Never walk under ladders
I keep a rabbits' tail
I'll take you up on a dare
Anytime, anywhere
Name the place, I'll be there
Bungee jumping, I don't care"

WHY? Why desre do you keep a rabbits tail...oh yeah your the "worst" at being superstitious...now I htink about it it makes sense. Im not getting the dare tihng though, you're fine with bungee jumping "anytime anywhere" just as long as it doesnt involve walking under any ladders then you *would* care




"Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life
Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life

Life"

yeah Desree we hard you the first 20m times "life" the songs called life.





"So after all's said and done
I know I'm not the only one
Life indeed can be fun
If you really want to
Sometimes living out your dreams
Ain't as easy as it seems
You wanna fly around the world
In a beautiful balloon

(Well we all know its not easy to fly around the world in a balloon beautiful or otherwise and only a moron would really think it was.)




"Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life
Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life

Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life
Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life
Oh life, oh life"

So What gives? Is life your "new word of the day" and you want to use it as much as possible soits imprinted on your brain?

"Sorry TRiG but "Weeping like a willow" is a good i not very inventive similie. In England a folk name for a variety o the tree is "the weeping willow"."

I'm quite sure he knows that. It's still not a good lyric.

'Umbrella' and 'Hit Me Baby One More Time' are terrible songs sung by arrogant divas with an attitude problem!
But everyone is entitled to their opinion.

Thanks, Elentari.

There's an impressively large weeping willow to the right of the main gate of Bedford Town Park.

And it really is not a good lyric.

TRiG.

The main gate gets everywhere! A main gate was mentioned on YouTube in a spoof Christmas Eve 1979 BBC 1 programme schedule.

Blimey, I never thought I'd see mention of Bedford Park around these here parts.

I used to spend many an hour playing tennis in there as a wee lad. *goes all misty eyed and then remembers he left Bedford running at 18*

"Keith Murry, holder of the boulder, lyrical analyst, mental roller coaster flow-er, money blower, MC over thrower, I flow with ya, two at a time, like Noah"

From E.P.M.D Back in Business. Not sure which track, might be K.I.M. I think as an MC name Keith Murry is so unusually pedestrian it becomes exotic.

Also the entirety of "Suicide" by Gravediggaz. Funnier on 45.

"Suicide, it's a suicide, Ba-da-bye-bye... If you want... to commit suicide Call 1800-cyanide line"

'I'm serious as cancer, when I say rhythm is a dancer.'


nuff said. That surely trumps the lot.