h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

my sign in name is atually thedeathofrats which is really quite short love the dragon proudwart! but i prefer mice TDOR the death of rats

"Moot" (adj) means something is arguable...

Most people don't know that.

i can wiggle my eyebrows like little caterpillars

i can wiggle my ears like an elephant

I can wiggle my... never mind...

You'll get a job with those funny puppeteers then

I failed the auditions. Nearly had the casting director's eye out

Ah, I wondered why I caught the casting director's eye. I put it in a jar.

TDOR, do you know about

Useless fact: cannot swallow underwater.

RF

wow didnt know that! useless fact;

the body can only intake so much alchohol before it goes numb and falls over from sheer drunkeness *TDOR fals over and stares glassy eyed at the ceiling*

tdor

TEEDOR!! TEEDOR!!! WAKE UP..

sheeeeshh..

i wanted to show him summat

A fish can die of thirst.
No, I'm not kidding. It's the rarest way for a fish to die: it happens when the icthioid in question gets a desease that causes it's esophagus to shrivle up. Poor, poor fish...
PWT
PS: TDOR,have I ever told you about drycle4aning?

"Did you know that an ostriches eye is bigger than it's brain....a tiger has striped skin.....and a baby goldfish is called a twit. Did you also know that Alfred Hitchcock didn't have a belly button, it was stitched up at birth. There, you feel better for knowing that don't you... "
Thus started the Useless facts conversation forum. How far it has come...
PWT

Mole-trappers would (and still do) hang the bodies of their victims on the fence surrounding the field they had just worked. This advertised their services to potential clients, and proved to their current employer that they had been hard at work.

From this grew the old wives tale that the moles bodies hung on the fence would deter other moles from entering the field.

Moleskin trousers, as sold at some gentleman's outfitters, are in fact 100% cotton, but still cost around £60.

Sometimes i have far too much time on my hands.

Man, I wish you could type the symbol for pounds on US keyboards... it looks a lot cooler that our $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ sign.
PWT

In 1966 the Jules Rimet trophy was stolen in England. Brazil said "The trophy would never be stolen in Brazil because even the thiefs are mad about football".

17 years later the trophy was stolen and never returned...in Brazil.

(I say 'never returned' but of course it could still turn up so don't have a go at me if it does.)

Sudden decompression of a plane's cargo hold can cause monkeys to explode.
http://animals.timduru.org/dirlist/monkey/PVWild12-Monkey-FaceCloseup.jpg

Queen Ranavalona of Madagasgar executed any of her subjects who appeared in her dreams

We don't have that sign on NZ keyboards either - there is a code, but I have forgotten it just as the code for an acute 'e' is alt + 233

Queen Ranavalona of Madagasgar executed any of her subjects who appeared in her dreams


That sounds pretty useful to me

My knees are hurting.

It's a fact.

Useful to me as it reminds me not to stand up for fear of falling down.

But it's useless to all of you.

Does this count?