h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

"What are you supposed to be a clone of?"

(When you are trapped with an incessant jabberer).
What's that annoying whine, the fluorescent lights?





pedboy

(for yet another incessant jabberer)

Hey, your lips are moving.......... where you saying something ?

Heres another one thats been used in real life...

Dealing with a particularly annoying girl I know on a night out who wouldn't leave me alone...

'Even if you *could* have me, you wouldnt know what to do with me.'

*aaarrrrrrrrrrrggghhh*

(for yet another incessant jabberer)

Hey, your lips are moving.......... were you saying something ?

(never to be said in real life)

I know you're cheap but I'm not prepared to pay even SO little






(except in the most extreme circumstances)

If you listen to your head you can hear the sea I bet.

I like the euphemisms for 'being a bit thick'

Including:

The wheels turning but the hamster's dead
The chimney's clogged

I'd like to take the p*ss out of you, but nature beat me to it.

For a company:

Q: How many people work at your place?
A: Half of them

It SOUNDS like English but I can't understand a word

You are obviously not suffering under the burden of a heavy intellect.

When you go all red like that, your face looks like a baboon's backside ....... it's quite an improvement

You mean like "Not the sharpest tool in the shed". SpinksSecret?
It is one of my favorites.




pedboy

My best put-down on here was when I told a researcher called Playboy Reporter that his opinions were only of any value to a disinterested perusal between strokes.

K-tshhhhh!

"Aspires to the status of a moron"

"thats a scary mask your wearing!" opps its your face!

Would be out of his/her depth in a parking-lot puddle.
Sets low targets and fails to achieve them.
Should not be allowed to breed.

Mind you, my favourite description of somebody who was lacking in experience was: "He's a bungalow. Nothing in the top storey."

When you're speaking of somebody who's in the same room, and he tries to mix in the conversation: "We were talking *of* you, not *to* you".

remember on a train home once with someone doing the annoying 'hello? hello? can you hear me?' at the top of their voice on a mobile phone and some wag from halfway down the train shouted out 'Yes!!' much to everyones amusement

Just bookmarking..sure someone will explain that to the slow ones.

One that comes from withi the towers:

'How many times do I have to flush before you go away?'