h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Yeah, you people who don't answer your phone really annoy ME! Answer it, say "Can't talk now, call you later" and hang up, don't just leave it to bloody ring! Or get an answering machine.

Talking about answering machines...

Why the heck can't people talk to them? 's family in England used to call when we had an automated message, in German. The tinny recorded-sounding voice and the beep confused them so they never ever left a message.

So we thought, ok we'll put the message in English. Now they get a recorded tinny sound of me, plus a beep. The English relatives still don't leave a message - instead I get 2 minutes of "hello? Are you there? hello?" - presumably they think I screen all calls? Or I get the German people who call me going "hallo? ist da jemand?"



When I put the message in English and German, the few people (of either nationality) who did leave a message complained that it was too long...

I hate talking to answering machines, though. Feels like you're leaving evidence.

Yeah, but you probably just hang up and don't grumble about it for a year or two.

True.

My mum rings, phone number is clearly visible in my missed calls list (and she knows this cos she has the same sort of phone) yet her message is usually 'Mam here, just giving you a quick call, I'll talk to you later'. Every. Time.

WHY

Only leave a message if you're going to put information in it that I can't figure out for myself!

Another gripe about shoe designers. I managed to find a pair of sandals I liked. The heels were a bit higher than I wanted, but I'm not planning to walk long distances in them. When I tried them on, my usual size was a good fit - until I tried to do up the ankle strap. If I'd kept the sandals on, the strap would have cut off my circulation. I had to have a size larger than normal, just so I could do up an essential part of the shoe.

Shoe designers please take note. A woman's ankle measurement is appreciably larger than her wrist size. Please allow us a strap that's long enough to go round with a bit to spare.

CD, are you trying to say that not all women are the same size (zero) and that ankles can be bigger or smaller, even in the same shoe size?
I have the opposite problem with bracelets and watches, my wrists are tiny and I always have to get them refitted. So I gave up wearing them.

Answering machines... my grandad used to leave the "Hello? Yael? Are you there? No? " Some people just don't get the hang of them. My mum got over the English answering machine phobia, though, and now happily leaves obvious messages for me to listen to. Hurray!

Hmmm, my hands are too big, I can't wear bangles because I can't get them on...

Also, when shops sell belts *with* their trousers they're all the same length! There's one size where it fits, and for everyone else the belt is too short or too long...

Heads of organistions doing the 'one big happy family' act, while the rest of the family look on, thinking 'be quite, you festering arse. We all know we despise you and you're unaware we exist except when we go on strike or holiday.'

It's only a petty semi-hate though, since it amuses me so much.

If you're hate can amuse you, you're in a good place, KB.

Sensible, presumably mature adult that leave cups, plate and cutlery to fester and grow all sorts of life forms like complete teenagers. And yes, most of them are trained nurses. And yes, it's me who ends up washing it all. Me and another 2 people here, to be honest.

Oooh Elly, I remember living with someone like that - worse bit was she never stopped moanin about the state of the place! My favourite was one weekend she was on her own in the flat and she managed in that space of time to dirty every single dish - every one of them! It was quite a feat!
Most aggravating was when I cleaned the place from top to bottom one Friday afternoon before heading to my mum's for the weekend and when I came back on Monday morning it was like a tip. I then was accosted about the need to tidy up! Obviously I told her what she could do tih it!

Hubby once worked with a couple of men who decided to have a competition to see how disgusting their coffee mugs could get. One of them even took his mug home to sandpaper the glaze so that the stains would stick better!

Niiiiiice! He's a keeper!

Hubby wasn't involved. He likes his mugs clean because otherwise the tea is ruined. (He's a tea drinker, not a coffee drinker.)

I meant the guy with the sandpaper... not a dig at your hubby

Why does it always rain just after I've decided to wash all my bed clothes?

And why does it decide to chuck it down after I've got my hair done?

Back in the days when I went to a ladies' hairdresser, you could guarantee it would be blowing a gale after I'd had my hair done. I have my hair cut by a barber now, so the weather doesn't seem to care any more.

Just when I tie my hair really well in a ponytail, where it's not too tight but there are also no fly aways sticking out, along comes that sweet little 2 year old lady of mine, sticks one finger in it and ruins the whole thing.