h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

You wretched gopher snot globules aren't worthy of my presence.

MV ... is that your original face or did a plastic surgeon somewhere lose his license?

*to all with a lot of offence*

the DNA resequencing did'ent work then


*big snigger*

I was just wondering what an atick was, maybe it was your way saying you were going to poke us with a very large blood sucking insect that you plucked off your disgusting neither regions thinking because you like that sort of thing it's really an honourable form of greeting to the rest of the twerps on here, excluding me of course I'm just scientifically curious about this thread and find that this is how I would imagine some lower forms of diseases would communicate grown in a petri dish.

AW you just want one is all, would you like the number of a good morgue?
I hear that they can do wonders with a complexion like yours.

Fishnet tights? I just thought Trin had tied a rather large and rotting whale around her hips.

Yes trin, I would be happy to stick my head in a bucket of tar! Just get me some out of your revolting belly button and stick it in a bucket for me k?
cheers
ford

Around *her* hips?

uh oh.....

Ugh, you loathsome putrid puddle of decomposing bat guano. And you, you acrid smelling mound of fermenting moose entrails!

No wonder you get along so well.

not bad...

how do you know poo so well? is it that you study it? or perhaps you share something in common with it? Or do you just enjoy smelling it, as you smell like it already
cheers
ford

Zoomer, are you talking to yourself again?

Ford, you wouldn't know poo if it hit you in the face. In fact, it looks like some did... maybe an elephant... oh, sorry - no, that is your face, isn't it?

*dips toe into the water*

Honestly, I snuck in nearly an hour ago and not ONE gratuitous insult yet!!

If brains were buttons you'd all use zippers!!

You smell of 3-day-old squirrel vomit.

It's the best I could do first thing in the morning.

I would like to make it clear that it is my inalienable right to wear fishnets as and when the fancy takes me. Not only do I cut quite a dash, but I can put them on all by myself. I realise this will make you lot terribly jealous, but I wear these items safe in the knowledge that bits of me won't leak out through the mesh.

Whereas bits of all of you leak. All bits. Always. It's messy, it's disgusting and the smells are repulsive. I think you need to be shrinkwrapped. With no holes left to breathe through.

Trin who are you kiddin, your in denial.

As for the rest of you things, I've seen more life and intelligence in my scrambled eggs.

No, I'm in my fishnets, thankyou very much.

Is 'scrambled eggs' some sort of code? I mean, look around you and you're going to see more life and intelligence in pretty much anything, given where you're starting from.

You Sir (and/or Madam, it's awfully difficult to tell) are a scruffy pile of dusty rags animated only by passing wind (yes I mean both definitions) and the shear will of the conglomeration of genetically mutated phlegm that resides in your centre.