h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I think it's time to break some house rules with this character

How do you mean?

3 days till has been gone a year Maybe he/she is waiting for a grand return

Oh glorious day that would be, let us read from the book:
(reading from; Book one of Dustotaph

- the first book of Leocxrulets: Called:
Hooversis):


"1:11 And the prophet (slurring only slightly) said, Let the Beat-Nicks bring forth grass, the herb yielding weed, and the Kebab House yielding kebab after late drinkies are all finished and all those that stay on have left, whose chilli sauce is plentiful in itself, upon the pavement let pavement pizza remain: and it was so.

1:12 and the prophet did not awaken the next day till the Sunrise was a many-old thing and the remains of Kebab had dried most unappetisingly, and still the Prophet thought it was good.

1:13 and the Evening and morning did indeed seem one, for the prophet had sniffed.

1:14 And the prophet did again visit the Pub in the evening to drink fermented vegetable products and smoke, and yet, the time between pub closing and Sunrise remained productive, even if the prophet couldn’t always remember what the nature of kebab or the hangers-on was, when Sunrise quickly did come upon the prophet once more. And the profet did indeed loose count.

1:15 And the prophet did create a mess, and received a phone call from someone from the pub, the previous evening to whom a promise had apparently been made. And the prophet did ignore this claim, being the prophet this was of ease in function and implementation.

1:16 And the Kebab did enter a receptacle, and the prophet saw the receptacle, in double, and decided both that too much had been drunk and that the receptacle, or indeed receptacles were good and called them Dustbin.

1:17 And because the prophet had lost track, it was the nineteenth night before the Prophet remembered the disentangled power lead, called Cable, and the Plug, called Plug, and the Prophet did, after Pub closing, but before sunrise, plug the Plug into the socket and Hoover.

1:18 And the Prophet saw that the dust which did hold much filth and which was dark and dank did vanish. And this was good, and the Prophet could see material lining the floor, and he remembered this was carpet."

lettuce pray nighthoover hte prophet among us,
fleating visit to earthly domaign,
on the second coming return among us,
our nighthooverlyness we shall regain Oh show us the path oh mighty one,
to enlightenment and dust free life,
take us into your hoover,
and dispatch the dust amongst us show us the true path,
the breatheren that hath grown,
restore our faith in your mite,
and shun those that show distaine

don't forget the 1st aniversary on teh 25 sep oh nighthoover where be you

No sign on Friday when I was DJing. No sign at the Star and Garter on Saturday, and no sign at the quiz last night. Oh nighthoover, where for art thou?

Lets through a on the night of Nighthoovers glourous return!!!

Good plan, and we can project Queens video to "I want to break free" on every wall.

*waits*

THey've been waiting for two millennia for Jesus to come back. If nighthoover is to be as great, surely we will have to wait just as long for his return.

In the meantime, we should go about establishing some temporal authorities such that we may preserve the faith with a rigid autocracy.

2legs, as pontificus maximus nighthooverus, will you crown me Theodoric I, Nighthooverly Emperor of Life, the Universe, and Everything?

Hmm, I think we should put it to the vote... all those in favour???

hmm...if you're going to vote for an american *guffaw*, voting for one from the pacific northwest if your best bet..but il viag? i dunno..i could be his provost or whatever and keep him out of trouble (he lives only a few hours away apparently)

There you have it. Everyone knows Americans make the best emperors. And the most responsible Nyssabird has already volunteered to be my chief executive (she may consider herself appointed). Since we already have the beginnings of a cabinet perhaps we should be considering an appropriate venue for my investiture?

pfft..I don't care, so long as I get to sit up in a tree in a gauzy little wood-nymph dress and wave a stick menacingly

*menacing look*

How about the woods just outside the nighthoover shrine. I believe there is a rock with foot shaped indentations into which my feet fit perfectly. Nyssa can sit in a tree above in her deliciously skimpy costume and wave her stick. I will kneel before 2legs as the faithful look on in awe...

Hmm... Pondering my first act as Emperor...

Hang around long enough, and something REALLY absorbing is bound to crop up...

Bechmania candenier, lar ints tha belly button fluffneyness ye know, gadcha Moonunit zeplin?

QED