h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

They should take the stairs! Or the escalator. I mean, is it really that hard to take the escalator? And think how much fitter they would be if they always took the stairs where possible!

People in Halls of Residence who only start playing loud music _after_ it's supposed to be quiet for the night.

People who take elevators for ONE floor! There should be a law about the minimum amount of floors required to use elevators.

Oh yes, I forgot: stairs that are so well hidden that people HAVE to use elevators for just one floor!

Hate to repeat what's already been said but the "Caution: Baby on Board" makes me WANT to drive into the back of people.

That "diddle-er-der, diddle-er-der, diddle-er-der-der" ring tone that has been the butt of god only knows how many jokes yet people still insist on having it ...

Oven ready meals ... I agree their easy but, holy cow, putting a plate of Omnibeast (tm) pie in the oven (or even worse, microwave) for 20 minutes only to have to add £50 worth of condiments to it so that it tastes vaguely more interesting than cardboard would be enough to drive the Dalai Lama round the bend ... don't do it people ...

Stupid rules and regulations in computer rooms, preventing you from staying awake to do work at 2 in the morning. Haven't they heard that people don't function without at absurd times of the day?

People who come into my office to have a meaningless chat while I'm on h2g2, just because they can smoke in my office, and not in theirs...

Can I put people who smoke indoors on the list without offending anyone?

Maybe I should clarify to people who smoke indoors in the same room as me.

You see someone struggling with a baby buggy and 17 bags of shopping and you think 'Been there, done that' and decide to help them by holding the door open for them or something, and they walk right by you without saying thank you or even acknowledging your existence. >

I hope at least that someone rolled over your shoes?

People who speed up as you cross the road in front of them ... what're they trying to prove? A$$-Wipes

people who are drunk when I am sober.

also people who are sober when I am drunk

AOL

Microsoft software... and most other "friendly" software. Hate the stuff. Why do you think I use Slackware Linux?

My laptop[s]; why can't they build one that I can have and that will last more than a year before it falls to bits.
Microsoft ditto.
People who talk for no reason as in "how are you", when they actually couldn't give a **** and don't want to know if you actually tell them how you feel.
People who think they know what is "best for me" or "good for yyou".
Staircases with really short flights of staires; difficult to run up/fall down.
Atoms that fail to be split in a proper maner.
Mice that drop dead in middle of experiments and s***w up decent results
Anything which is; conveinance food; Esp micro-meals

B and Q. Hardly anything seems to have a price ticket!

Please believe me but I have no wish to upset the mods so I will try to be as inofensive as possible, but....

I suspect that this is only really a problem for men.

When you go for a wee wee and there is a, well a pube, kind of trapped around your, um, willy, and then it all starts but, um, shall we say this interferes with a direct toilet / wee wee interface.

I hope that was not too offensive. But you know what it's like. At least if you are a man. Sorry.

Posting a reply only to see it come up (1 hour ago)

Yeah, who's got the clock problem here? My computer has automatically updated, I assume h2g2's have (unless there's a parity error -1 becomes +1 -yeah probably that ), *Orcus shuts himself up*

Women who complain when you hold a door open for them because they're *perfectly capable of doing it themselves*. This is not chauvenist, it is simple common courtesy and is the polite thing to do. I hold the door open for anybody who is a few paces behind me.

Thank you, Orcus. And thank you everyone who has held a door open for me.

Supermarket cashiers who look everywhere but at you, for example while they're waiting for the credit card booking to come through.

Yeah, I hold doors open if someone, anyone, is behind me, but notice its only ever the aliens (females (ha ha)) who then have the ordasity to complain... (completely non understandable species).
And someone previous over the "wee wee" problem; be very, very careful when going WEE WEE after XXX, because it useually makes a nasty mess all over the toilet, as directional control is completely lost.. (sounds like the kind of conversation I start over lunch with important (VIP's) I don't want to be with..