h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*tiptoes in*
Is he gone?
How did he know where I come from?

Must have read a lot of backlogs that one.
Hi Lil, good to see you! I have half an hour left of my w***-day, I guess I have to some before I go home....
It seems we are destined to meet in doorways
Hello and goodbye.

Well, I can't get to my home page, and I can't get to the Post (been trying for 2 days), but I _could_ get here from the front page, so here I am. Hi Garius! Try some of this punch.

Mitch Miller is the leader of a male choir. He was all the rage amongst the Lawrence Welk set back in the 50's. My grandmother had all his records. *wonders if people will know who Lawrence Welk was*

*sips punch*

*Takes a glass of punch and sips.*

Mmmmm. Good.

I missed you two when you posted after me - I kept refreshing the forum, but I was always at the bottom with no one below me. I hadn't noticed that I was the last in the group of 20 posts. Arrrrgggghhh.

Lil - I just posted something to your Atellier forum about Mitch Miller.

And Iorieth, I brought you a gift (whenever you get here). It's a copy of "Magical Mellons", the sequel to Caddie Woodlawn. Should be good for reading on the plane.

My home page came up in another window while I was playing Mahh Jongg so I'll be off to the Atelier and see.

The guest of honour should be checking in in a few hours. For all we know, she's enmired in the slowness right now, or attacking the backlog.

*Bursts through the door, panting.*

Phew, pant, that's some backlog, pant, did I make it in time? pant.

*Produces a large beautifully bound book for Ioreth. The title is 'Conversations from the Aroma Cafe'. In the front is written: 'To Ioreth, A small reminder of us all here at the cafe. Wishing you bon voyage and a safe return.' signed 'BluesSlider'.*

Hope she likes it, if I've done it right it will update itself as new conversations start .

Hello all, I really REALLY REALLY wish I could chill but my computer's been insane and my mom is on my ass to do lots of stuff before tomorrow but I'll be back in a bit. THANK YOU ALL

--------> cc((~))

BluesSlider, what an excellent gift! I need to go through the backlog and make a list of the presents.


I'm having home-made bacon-lettuce-tomato sandwiches for dinner today.


*Ook enters cafe from back porch carrying an acorn from the Magic Forest, which he carefully places next to BluesSlider's book*

Is that for Ioreth?
Ook: Ook! *nods*

Aww.

Hi Ioreth. Don't worry about your Mom - she is probably fretting about the details so that she doesn't have to think about you going away for a year (it is just you going, isn't it?). Must be hard for her.

I didn't realise how generous everybody's been until I started logging the stuff. Here's a list, and y'all let me know if I've missed anything so far:

Looney -- oranges from NZ and some exquisitely-carved pips
Odradek -- small package wrapped in sparkly holographic paper, contents still undiscovered
ox - 5 lb. hunk of gold, a huge ruby, a tin whistle & pocket lint
Colonel Sellers wants a piece of the holiest rock you got going
Sporky -- 14 million in cut-up incomplete notes
bumblebee -- a down pillow
jr52 -- a carton of Marlboros, a box of chocolates and a pair of nylons
Freedom -- an orange bicycle that folds to the size of a matchbox via ancient Viking techniques (back wheel later painted green by Looney)
**twilight** -- classic goo-coloured sweater with white marker
Redbeard -- special memory glasses with ability to take and recall visial images
Lil -- one personal organizer: an Indian elephant with a satellite dish in its headpiece (not only does it memorize URLs and addresses but everything can be carried in the elephant's trunk, including the elephant)
Barney's Bucksaws -- a necklace: a piece of Canadian souris agate, coloured amber and honey, strung on a cord
Bahb -- a reference fairy, invoked with the word 'Abulafia'
Garius -- book "Magical Mellons". the sequel to Caddie Woodlawn
BluesSlider -- a book, 'Conversations From the Aroma Cafe', bound in white leather
Ook -- an acorn from the Magic Forest outside the cafe

That's quite a pile!

*fluttering of lacy, flecked-wings*
"I hope I'm not too late! I've been trying to get here for the last 2 days! I have a gift for loreth, I didn't wrap it, so you can all see it, I hope you're all impressed.....it's the biggest shell I could find, look at the gorgeous shimmery colours! And I filled it full of Guardian Angel dust....for loreth to sprinkle on herself and re-apply after bathing/swimming/showering etc. Just to keep her safe out there in big, bad{sometimes} Real World Land.
Now, is everyone behaving themselves in here? No tantrums about the slow state of the net these last few days?? Good, no work for me to do then, I'll have a tall glass with an ice-cream Sundae in it, please! Then I'm fluttering off for an appointment with Real Life!
Be good everybody, and loreth....take care of yourself."
*sound of wings fluttering.....

*bounds in, polevaulting over most of the backlog*



Hello hello, haven't time to stay, just coming in to see if l could catch loreth...if not, and l don't get to see you, which l hope isn't the case, have an utterly marvellous time.
The gift l gave you ought not to be opened until you've been in lsrael one week. On the anniversary of your first week there, open it at sunrise. You will find inside of it precisely the thing you need most for your trip, and which you somehow managed to overlook upon leaving.

Best of luck, kiddo. And a tip for you: be nice to the customs guards. They really don't have very highly developed senses of humour...and -nobody- likes a full body cavity search. Especially not after such a long flight.

*grabs a cup of punch to go -- not that she'll be needing much in the way of mind altering substances where she's going, and races off again*
Back later!

Missed her by minutes!

You can't tell me this place wouldn't be full of customers if the servers weren't crippled. *pauses to admire her triple negative*

*decides nothing more can be said and sits down with today's papers, so far untouched*

*Ook sits down and reaches for the Times crossword*

*sparklers-wheee*

Hi, all. Lil, yeah , I remember Mithch Miller and actually didn't mind him much. L. Welk was a different story entirely. I mean, Wayne Newton wwas the whitest white boy you've ever seen in those days. Of course, I remember all this as a wee child at my gram's knee. Seem to recall I was over that knee occaionally, too.

IIEM, root beer float please.

*heads to couch (of which he has become quite fond)*

Does seem pretty quiet for a party, tho. Could word of Odra's target-malpracticing gotten around?

Hey, it says here that the Sewage-Sludge Convention in Birmingham, England, is just getting underway. I suppose Bluebottle will be attending.

Hey jr, didn't see you come in. *looks up* Hey! What happened to the bells of sarna that were hanging on the back of the door?

IIEM, let me have a dollop of vanilla ice cream in this punch. We'll call it a Blue Dust Bumper. Mmm.

Hello all! Ah, punch bowl still full, I see. *grabs cup of punch*

Sewage-Sludge Convention? Now that sounds like fun! Boy, if I had a choice between that and a week in Las Vegas, I don't know what I'd do!

I seem to think I remember 'Sing Along with Mitch Miller', unless that was before my time, which may very well have been the origin of the bouncing ball over the words in a singalong.

Redbeard, your post deserves the only double positive that makes a negative

*Yeah right*

Must be the punch

Looney, I made an extra BLT for you *hands over fragrant sandwich wrapped in serviette*

And here's a packet of crisps and the obligatory slice of pickle.

I think it's working. I really think h2g2 is working. Either that or I'm the only one left. Crikey, let's check.