h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*jing-ingle-ling*
*strides in with smile*
'owdy, 'owdy, 'owdy, everybody! *sniffs the air apprehensively**notices pile debris and smoldering papers in corner, Odra ensconced with hitherto unknown of pet, new toy, and bucket of punch**stride falters**looks to Loony and nods in Odras direction*

Is it safe?

Where is the Going-Away-Girl?
Oh, I always gets so emotional when theres farewell-partys
*Digs in her handbag for a handkerchief, handbag growling in a low rumble*
*My, we are grumpy today*
Sorry about that, I think it has tooth-ace.
I brought you a down-pillow, for the journey, dear.
-B-

*croons*hello, hello. hello, hello. I don't know why you say goodby, I say hello.

Not being able to speak for the owners I'm uncomfortable meeting your request(Knowing the statutes in Dorothyland[canz-ahhhs]). But, I'm sure the IIEM is bound by no such restrictions and there is that rather large bowl of blue(?) sparkling foaming punch that Lil made for your party. She shook some kind of dust out of the saxaphone there in to it and all partakers thus far have reacted. I unfortunately do not have that same excuse, this is just how I am.

Did most assuredly want to wish you 'bone voy-ahhh-gee. And..tender you this carton of Marlboro reds, a box of chocolates, and a pair of nylons.

*not wrapped but, given the smoldering papers in the corner, maybe, a good thing*

*somewhat sheepishly (theres that word, again)* Don't know if they still do, but, worked fine for me in a previous incarnation. (Well,,, maybe not the nylons.)

*Rushes in, lugging an orange bicycle, orders a double latte to go from the IIEM and quickly downs two or three cups of punch while waiting for her coffee*

Well, I can't stay, but...

*Writes note for Ioreth*

Dear Ioreth,
I regret that I could not spend more time at your fabulous going-away party. I hope you have a comfortable journey and that you have a great year. Please find my present to you tied to this note - it can be of much use for transportation. It is very easy to pack, since it can be folded down to the size of a matchbox (It's an old viking technique, although they used it mostly on boats).
Cheers!


*Ties note to the handlebar of the orange bike and sets it next to the IIEM, grabs latte, quickly drinks two more cups of punch and walks carefully out the door*

Well, gentlefems, I must pop out now. Ioreth, hope to see you again b4 you leave, but, if not, fare well in the promised land, and don't take any wooden shekels.

And, if you would be so kind, when Odra refocuses, please ask her for me if that is a combination jello projector/tickle Reagan.

*smothers smoldering bits in corner with foot*

*pop*

Paints the back wheel of the bike green.

Steps back to watch the spokes flash

*Starts giggling uncontrollably*
Oh my, this punch is really something!
*Giggling and sliding off the sofa, landing in a heap on the floor*

*doesn't come to the café to wish Ioreth good fortune for next year, or to get a lemon tea, because that would mean that shes running up a daytime phonebill.*

*wakes up and finds herself on chaise in cafe's back porch with a crick in her neck and her hair sticking in odd directions*

Oh. Ow.

*gets up and stumbles into main space over threshold*

I see Joanna has delivered donuts with actually doing so. It's going to be that kind of day. Ew, I smell scorched newspapers.

*finds blackened paper in corner, picks them all up and carries them out the back, then returns*

Well, I'll start with coffee so I can last the day, I think. And an uncertainty donut. I think.

*Bumblebee's handbag finally has had enough and starts dragging it's owner towards the door*
What? Oh but darling I want to staaaay! I am having the best of times!
Let go!
-
-
-

*jingle*

Bye Bumblebee, come back later!

*throws open door almost knocking the bells of. Grabs door for support, panting*

I made it!! I didn't think I would ever be able to get here. I need some of that punch now.

Here Ioreth, here's a sweater in classic goo and a white marker so all your friends at h2g2 can sign it. If you get lonely there you can put it on and think of your friends here.

*gulps down punch, takes another*

Better have a few to get on the same level as you all.

ah, couch.

*collapses on it*

*comes to, face down, with head in utility bucket*

Ow...wha?
Um.
...dark?

*realizes that she has come to, face down, with head in bucket*

Oh.
*sits up, head still in bucket*
Can l have some coffee....ow. On second thought, l think l'll just have some more punch.

You can have all the punch you want!

*sticks a lighted sparkler into a goo donut*

Oh. IIEM, an Ook Special, please. Ook, come down. Come on, get that silly grin off your face. *Ook suddenly swoops down, grabs fruit and heads out back to the woods*

So, good morning **t** -- the party will be going on right through tomorrow. Plenty of time to consume punch.

*attempts to sip punch, still with bucket on head, unaware of the futility of this. Eventually realizes that she can run a straw up beneath the bucket, leaving it on her head, as she bounds about the cafe, still wielding her gun-thing, looking for all the world like a Stormtrooper in a really, really low-budget Lucas film*

*tackles Odra from behind and tips bucket off head*
You can keep the gun, but I'd rather you saw what you're aiming at...

Here, eat something solid -- look at all the pretty donuts!

*whaps self in bucketless head*
l almost forgot...ow. That hurt...where'd my helmet go...?

No matter. Can l have an uncertainty donut, Lil?

Maybe.

*giggles*

*waits*

*giggles again*

*waits*

No...seriously...can l?