h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

How much a certain footballer cost to transfer.
The London Olympic bid.

Anyone else NOT care about anything?

...what Arnold Scwarzenegger thinks of George Bush.

(I *do* care about the olympic bid, but only insofar that if London succeeds, I have made a rather rash bet that I'll eat my hat...)

Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq, Iraq,

Jennifer Lopez (the one who has evolved into 'J Lo' as though she's girl-next-door) and who she's engaged to, who's she marrying, who's she's dumping etc ad nauseum.

Any blatantly attractive person saying "I don't think I'm attractive/I hate my body blah blah"

Princess Diana "7 years since that awful tragic day" crap. Probably a day since someone unfamous unpretty unrich died and orphaned their kids.

I don't care about football full stop, and less about whatever football player it was getting however much for whatever it was transfer to whoever it was.
I missed ALL* of the olympics just finished, and am proud =with this, if only they'd have stopped mentioning bits about it on teh news on radio four my life for those two or whatever weeks would have been a lot better.
The olympic bid is of no interest to me whatsoever, London is bidding isn't it?
Iraq, no need to worry about that, Bush's problem.
Can't think of what else I'm ignoring, most things really

Darfur. Sorry, but I just don't. Oh - more people in Africa having an appalling time and dying and killing each other? How novel.

Anything happening in any soap opera, to any soap actor, or to anyone related to or acquainted with any soap actor.

The possibility that abortion may be completely banned in the US. Insomuch as I do care about it, I hope it happens. They deserve it.

House prices. I have no intention of selling my house, therefore house prices are irrelevant to me.

XP Service Pack 2. I'm on ME, and reasonably happy with it.

Speed cameras and the people who complain about them. I have a radical solution for those who don't like speed cameras - don't break the f**king law, moron. Then you won't get caught. I'd put a speed camera every fifty yards on every road in Britain. Don't wanna get a fine? Don't speed. Simple.

Fat people's self esteem. Don't tell me diets don't work for you. Just get off your enormous arse and do some f**king exercise. And until your body mass index is under 30, stay indoors and stop making me want to puke by wobbling down the road with your thighs rubbing together in those elasticated trousers you have to wear, you repulsive blob of grease.

H.

Ohh, Hoo - I think you do care about some of those! But back to my list:

I do not care one jot about the UK's first official music download chart launching next Wednesday.

I am bored rigid by any record that makes it into the singles chart or appears on TOTP.

I could not care less about people whinging that the housing market is collapsing.

I can't care about a stampede of hundreds of shoppers in western Saudi Arabia that left at least three people crushed to death. No matter how funny or bizzare that story is.

I do not care that Pope John Paul II has appealed for the release of two French journalists who are being held hostage in Iraq. I generally find that if you are with people prepared to chop your head off over kids wearing head scarfs, then an appeal by an old geezer is not likely to help.

To think of it, I couldnt care less about ANY hostage taken prisoner in Iraq. We all know you will end up dead already, so please just cut to the chase and do it.

I completely do not in any way shape or form care about what tennis players wear on the court.

badgers

Television, full stop.
Chart music, full stop.
my washing machine.
sport, full stop.
House prices.
The poor plight of the poor farmers in the UK suffering this year from the weather, I've never seen a poor farmer, less having the horrofr of iriving a year old Merc/whatever represents their poorness.
Potatos.
Hedgehogs.
Odd socks.

Everything except those which affect me closely, i.e. schoolwork and my girlfriend and my parents being #$@%@% and stuff like that.
ESPECIALLY not how much Bush cares about people.

I do not care about people stuck at Bus Stops

Coffee being full of caffeine

I do not care about Food contents settling during transit or stupid serving suggestions

I do not care about girls outperforming boys at school.

I do not care about how many Megapixels a Digital Camera can take

PinkyBoodles,

Up to this point I didn't care about what tennis players wear on court but I have to admit......my appetite has been whetted. Can you say more? The danger is that if you don't my imagimation will run riot.

I don't care about Big brother. Transvestite, transexual or transparent.

PP

PP,

A Williams sister caused uproar by appearing on court looking like a Gladiator reject with knee-high boots, black studded top and a denim mini. Blah blah blah. Suppose I just don't care because I think it shouldn't matter what the hey you wear as long as you can hit the stupid ball at the right time to the right place.

Not as exciting as you probably thought.

In fact, pretend I said nothing and let your imagination go!

I'm a little interested in house prices falling. Actually, I hope they fall drastically so's I might be able to buy one....

Knee-high boots, black studded top and a denim mini.....Hmmmm..... Oh damn, excuse me I'll be back in a minute.

PP