h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

but you weren't at the TOP of a new page


na na na na na !

People who imitate violent crimes out of films.

(Stop it, or they will ban all good films!)

Back to the headaches for a minute. I have a friend who suffers badly with migraines (flashing lights, sickness etc etc) and has to confine herself to a darkened room for maybe two or three days before it goes off. She is not swinging the lead, she is genuinely affected by these headaches in a bad way, her job was threatened and her lifestyle curtailed far too often to be bearable.

Her Mum, not the most tactful or feeling of people, knew that she was in the middle of a three day stretch, but still rang her up, got her to the phone (with difficulty) and told her that it was all my friends fault that she had these headaches and she had brought them on herself - because her hair was too long and the weight of it was causing the migraines!



Friend not impressed, put the phone down

Sorry in advance if you are one or have one....

People who talk to me endlessly about football or motorcycles in the mistaken belief that I am interested in either.

William.

People who keep forgetting the punchline...


Incog.

... To which the barman replied..."just don't..." no wait..





I'll get it in a moment...




Ah , right- "Well whatever you do, don't.... " er....






No, that's not it



Ach- it was really funny anyway- guess you just had to be there .... er....

Being asked for my asl

If anyone's petty hate was people who reply without reading the back-log, I just did that.

Foxy

Songs that you HATE but are so catchy you
end up singing them anyway.

"I know a song that will get on your nerves,
get on your nerves,
get on your nerves,
I know a song that will get on your nerves,
Get, get, get on your nerves"

Like that, you mean?

UG

double tautology!

NCP Car Park [what does CP stand for?]
if done before, just spotted the thread and didn't get time to read the backlog!

My current petty hate is those silly slouch boots that look like something an Elf would wear in Lord Of The Rings that girls are currently wearing with their mini-skirts and crop tops. Don't they know it's summer? They'll all have mingy, sweaty feet and anyway they look silly.

Pointy shoes that seem to have come back - especially the flat ones. Make feet look massive !
People who wear open-toed shoes but have really scabby toes and toenails.
People who sit on a tube or train with the windows and vents shut in 90 degree heat.
People who sit on tube or train and pretend they haven't spotted a pregnant or elderly person so they can keep their seat. (Miraculously wake up/look alert as soon as person leaves/gets offered a seat by someone else)
People who won't admit to ever having seen any trivial TV or says they only watch the news/wild life or history documentaries. Don't believe anyone who says they haven't the faintest idea who Dot Cotton is. If I'm wrong then they're a petty hate anyway.

This has probably come up, but anyone in a car who does any or all of the following:

- Drive down the middle lane of the motorway at 60mph.
- Omit to indicate when you're sat patiently at the mini-roundabout waiting for them to go straight on and they go left.
- Zoom up to your back bumper at 110mph and then brake sharply.
- Take up two parking spaces

B

People who think that if you are walking along thinking you are sad(some of us in repose have faces that naturally do that ok)
People who say 'Surviving' when you ask them how they are doing.
People who say 'You must cut your cloth....'
People who say 'theyre growing up aren't they!'

People who claim they have a migraine when it's only a headache.

People who claim they have flu when it's just a bad cold.

when someone says something that's obviously insulting, and then says "no offence"

"You have to be the most stupid person I've ever met. No offence."

The pop-up for msn messenger that has CV advice on it:

There's a guy who looks like he's getting off on being intimidating. Who makes up these rules about job interviews? What's the point of having face to face job interviews when we could have interviews on the net? This would let nervous people shine and save time.

<>

You should check out the thread called Ear Worms! on the 'ask the h2g2 community' page . . .

az

oohwee, chirpy, chirpy, cheep, cheep . . .
m-m-m-my Sharona!
waterloo, couldn't escape if I wanted to . . .

"Earworm" just about sums the annoying catchy song experience up.

Anyone else heard of Clint Boon?

People who ask you about your exams, in detail, when you have been doing them solidly for about five hours, how they went, what questions you got, and whether you revised enough, in the mistaken belief that they are "taking an interest", but in fact you never even want to hear the word "exam" ever. Especially if coupled with the subject that you have just done.